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Funny satire stories about DUI

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Funny story: Mido Pelted with Midol Pill Bottles While FA Officials Look on

Mido Pelted with Midol Pill Bottles While FA Officials Look on

Middlesborough's Mido is sick and tired of the taunts and humiliations visited upon him by the rude footballers of Newcastle: "This time they went too far. They know about Muslim discretion about feminine hygiene practices and to have menstrual...

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Funny story: Pope accused of Drink Driving

Pope accused of Drink Driving

News has emerged today that Pope Benedict XVI was once accused of drink driving. Back in 1972 in Berlin, a young Cardinal Josef Ratzinger was driving his VW Beetle in a noticeably erratic manner. In Seine News interviewed Heinz von Ketchup, the p...

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Funny story: Hannah Montana Arrested For DUI

Hannah Montana Arrested For DUI

Rock star Hannah Montana was arrested for DUI in Hollywood on Saturday night. Police indicated that her blood alcohol content was 0.09, just over the legal limit. Officials from Bob Disney Studios were quick to deny the reports, noting that Hanna...

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Funny story: Drunk driving found to be pretty fun

Drunk driving found to be pretty fun

In what might be the biggest blow to anti-drunk driving laws and advocates since the introduction of the Chrysler Minibar, top alcoholics have proven drunk driving to be "hella fun." Although the theory had been known to many for many years...

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Funny story: Americans To Celebrate Independence Day With Third-Degree Burns, Drunk Driving

Americans To Celebrate Independence Day With Third-Degree Burns, Drunk Driving

OMAHA - Americans are gearing up for the upcoming celebration of Independence Day with plans to barbeque, let off fireworks, inflict third-degree burns on themselves and others, and drive drunk.

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Funny story: Shrek Charged With DUI

Shrek Charged With DUI

Hollywood hero Shrek was arrested in Malibu yesterday on a DUI charge. Reports indicate he had a blood alcohol content (BAC) of 0.09, just over the legal limit. Prosecutors in Los Angeles County say that while the BAC was not that high, the effect is...

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Funny story: Internet Operation While Intoxicated Arrests Up

Internet Operation While Intoxicated Arrests Up

Washington, DC (IPP) - The number of arrests for internet operation while intoxicated (IOWI) violations has gone up dramatically since the law was first enacted one year ago. The law is unsual because it is the first law ever enacted universally by...

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Funny story: Ireland and the UK to introduce 'Drink Driving' lanes on private toll roads.

Ireland and the UK to introduce 'Drink Driving' lanes on private toll roads.

The governments of Ireland and the United Kingdom are co-operating on a highly controversial plan to introduce police controlled private toll roads for drunk drivers.

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Funny story: Ted Kennedy Proposes New Drunk Driving Lane

Ted Kennedy Proposes New Drunk Driving Lane

Boston, MA (USA Today) - Senator Ted "I'll drink to that" Kennedy has proposed the addition of DUI Lanes to all interstate freeways.

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Funny story: Nation on Red Alert as Sutherland is Jailed

Nation on Red Alert as Sutherland is Jailed

The news that TV hard man Kiefer Sutherland has been jailed for drink-driving has shocked America and buoyed terrorist organisations the world over.

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Funny story: America to Allow Drunk Driving

America to Allow Drunk Driving

HILLSDALE, MICHIGAN- Citing a recent spike in Americans driving while under the influence of alcohol the Bush Administration has introduced new legislation requiring impaired drivers to follow a speed limit twenty miles per hour above what is current...

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Funny story: Caddyshack's Bill Murray arrested for allegedly driving, possibly a stolen, golf cart drunk on the way back from a disco in Stockholm

Caddyshack's Bill Murray arrested for allegedly driving, possibly a stolen, golf cart drunk on the way back from a disco in Stockholm

Stockholm, Sweden - Apparently reprising his beloved role as the emotionally challenged greenskeeper, Carl, obsessed with killing a renegade gopher in the original Caddyshack movie, Bill Murray was arrested by Stockholm police in the early morning ho...

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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan's Drug Possession a "Misunderstanding"

Lindsay Lohan's Drug Possession a "Misunderstanding"

Lindsay Lohan straightened out the rumors that she was driving drunk, under suspension and in possession of cocaine.

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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan Starts Celebrity Movement Against DUI Laws

Lindsay Lohan Starts Celebrity Movement Against DUI Laws

With the recent DUI troubles of Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie, a celebrity movement is forming to push back against stiff DWI laws. Lindsay Lohan has become something of a poster child for the movement due to her late...

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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan falls off the wagon and jumps behind the wheel; arrested two blocks away from the Santa Monica Police Dept.

Lindsay Lohan falls off the wagon and jumps behind the wheel; arrested two blocks away from the Santa Monica Police Dept.

Santa Monica, California - Lindsay Lohan, who was just released form rehab two weeks ago, was shortly arrested thereafter just two blocks away of the Santa Monica Police Department last night.

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Funny story: Al Gore Jr. Charged with felony drug-possession; faces 2 years in jail; Lawyers to use 'Fruit from the Poisoned Tree' defense over dad's objection

Al Gore Jr. Charged with felony drug-possession; faces 2 years in jail; Lawyers to use 'Fruit from the Poisoned Tree' defense over dad's objection

San Diego, California - Al Gore Jr. was formerly charge with felony drug-possession and one moving violation that stemmed form his traffic stop for speeding which resulted in his arrest on July 4th. If convicted on the more serious charge, Gore Jr.,...

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Funny story: Sober Drivers Cause More Accidents than Drunks

Sober Drivers Cause More Accidents than Drunks

Keginbumport, Maine (IP) - A scientific study has revealed that sober drivers cause six times as many accidents as drunks do. Statistics from the study have led scientists to conclude the extremely drunk drivers cause the least amount of accidents e...

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