Industry spectators are heralding the end of the current economic recession due to a startling discovery made in the vaults of the prestigious Union Bank in Switzerland; namely, bonds, stocks, gold bullion and cash currencies to the value of CHF 6 tr...
'Piggy Party' a small toy company based in George Osborne's own parliamentary constituency of Tatton, Cheshire, was hailed by the Chancellor yesterday as a "shining example for small businesses." "Rather than sitting around waiting for handouts...
Dear Constituents I have had a very busy week and should really take a break away from the pressure of constituency work. But duty calls and, anyway, my wife thinks we should visit her mother in Macclesfield. My impending visit to Greece in time for their next bailout or complete exit from the Euro sounds like my best chance for fun before Parliament re-opens. By the way, explaining whe...
Former Prime Minister Tony Blair is wrong when he says we should not hang bankers in anger over the current financial mess, says a leading academic. In an interview with the Daily Telegraph today, Mr Blair defends the free market and liberal econo...
Mitt Romney today demonstrated a profound sense of the moment and just how severely in touch he can be with his audience in a speech before the U.S. Dressage Federation summer convention being held in the Cayman Islands over the past two months. It w...
After only just recovering from the Barclays interest rigging affair and the RBS/ Nat West computer failure, the banking system was thrown into confusion again today, by what experts were calling a "One in a million" occurrence. A near meltdown of th...
In a bold move announced today, the Government is setting up a board of inquiry to look into the boards of inquiry that they have already set up. Headed by a group of very important people, some of whom have beards and wear suits, the Inquiry Inqu...
With the news that Car Salesmen and Estate Agents are now more trusted than Banks a new initiative is under way to capitalise on the public mood. Car Salesman Sam Slammer is setting up in Ashby de la Douche High Street with opening offers of a sec...
Moves to have an inquiry into the running of Banks have come up against a brick wall. When faced by an inquiry no one can remember and no one is to blame. Amnesia in the higher echlons of society is rampant and some believe it is a virus that can...
Culture Secretary, Jeremy Hunt has spoken up for the whole Government in expressing admiration for the Chairman of Barclays, Marcus Agonise, over his decision to resign over the fiddling of interest rates by the Bank. 'He was the one in charge' de...
Kevin Smalley, 48, a clerk at Natleys Bank has been dismissed from his job after a senior manager discovered that he had lent £10 to a fellow employee. The reciprocant of the loan, Wendy Smidgin, a sales counter assistant at the same branch, had m...
Bobbis bank have downgraded Odd-Grip bonds to 'skinner', Ocadi options to 'weeping' and Yyll Group smellies to 'peturbed' in another oily rut on the markets today. Xavier Casini commented - "Ocadi is a tall banker who shops at John Lewis, Super G...
David Cameron's bank account has been depleted to zero by a Robin Hood Style Computer Hacker. The attack came just 20 minutes after the Tory without a heart declared war on the Under 25s and tiny children who have already been abandoned by their fa...
Thousands of customers were left locked out of their bank accounts across the UK this week as a popular high street bank, that cannot be named for technical reasons, lost complete control of it's computing systems. ATMs, on-line banking and chip and...
Washington DC - Lobbyists around the capital are pushing the Congress to enact new legislation to curb what they see is an attitude of blatant entitlement. According to our source, Representative Crass Raftgay, banks want to put an end to entitl...
Athens - Greece has voted to print the Euro locally. According to our source, Mr. Pimpleonhishass, head of the Greek bank, the measure adopted will have Greece create money out of nothing. Greece will not return to the Drachma, but continue with the...
Hope, Texas - Julie and Barney Thompson were about to end it all. Thirty-seven years of backbreaking work, raising four children and volunteering for everything - from helping the search for lost kids to endless spaghetti dinner fundraisers for sick friends and neighbors to burying their parents out back - all down the drain. Time had caught up with them and was about to run them over. His Dad...
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