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Funny story: "Ask not what your country can do for you---ask what you can do ---to save your own sorry ass!"

"Ask not what your country can do for you---ask what you can do ---to save your own sorry ass!"

Politico is reporting today that the Romney campaign is in full victory mode as Election Day approaches. On one leaked transcript Romney is heard practicing his inaugural address and evidently he will be wasting no time in telling America how he is g...

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Funny story: Nightsticks vs Vibrators: NYPD Cracks Down on Dildo Dealers

Nightsticks vs Vibrators: NYPD Cracks Down on Dildo Dealers

New York - A mixed squad of undercover and uniformed police has broken up "a sex ring" that was attempting to distribute "vibrating devices" in "broad daylight" at locations in Rockefeller Center and the Meatpacking District. The disrupted giveawa...

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Funny story: Isn't It Time To Shoot The Elephant In The Room?

Isn't It Time To Shoot The Elephant In The Room?

Following the recent shootings in Colorado and Wisconsin, isn't it time that the US stood back, took a good long look at itself and focused the telescopic sight on the elephant in the room? The pro-gun lobby rants about the fact that lone nutters will always kill people, regardless of gun controls. Psychiatrists will tell you, and rightly so, the lone nutters are relatively rare and that there...

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Funny story: Yogurt Rescues the Greek Economy

Yogurt Rescues the Greek Economy

Athens - Don't stick a fork in Greece. Use a spoon instead, because the debt-riddled nation is about to emerge as Europe's economic powerhouse, thanks to booming sales of Greek yogurt. "Greek yogurt has more protein than regular yogurt. It tastes...

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Funny story: Taylor Swift Dumps One Kennedy For Another

Taylor Swift Dumps One Kennedy For Another

HYANNIS PORT, Massachusetts - It appears that country artist Taylor Swift prefers to keep it in the family; the Kennedy family. The 22-year-old singer spent the Independence Day holidays at the Kennedy Hyannisport Compound in Hyannis Port with Pat...

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Funny story: London 2012 Olympic Opening Ceremony Exposes Non-existent Countries

London 2012 Olympic Opening Ceremony Exposes Non-existent Countries

The international community is trying to come to terms with the shock revelation that some countries with which nations have links, simply do not exist. Two hundred and four countries were represented at the opening ceremony of London 2012, and it...

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Funny story: Washington Bails Out Facebook with a Cash Takeover

Washington Bails Out Facebook with a Cash Takeover

Washington DC - In a rare bipartisan action, President Obama has joined with Congress to purchase Internet social media giant Facebook for an undisclosed sum. "If you have to ask how much, you can't afford it," Obama joked with reporters. "But ser...

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Funny story: Mitt Romney Asked To Leave England And Go Back To Hee Haw, Massachusetts

Mitt Romney Asked To Leave England And Go Back To Hee Haw, Massachusetts

LONDON - Mitt Romney has just clearly demonstrated the art of sticking one's foot in one's mouth. The GOP presidential candidate figured that he would jump on the Olympics bandwagon and garner all kinds of free publicity for his political campaign...

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Funny story: Anderson Cooper Gay, Rush Limbaugh Comes Out as Fat

Anderson Cooper Gay, Rush Limbaugh Comes Out as Fat

Rush Limbaugh has finally made it official: He's fat. The conservative radio show host has never publicly confirmed that detail until now, just a day after Anderson Cooper revealed his homosexuality. Limbaugh made the announcement via his Frien...

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Funny story: Washington Outlaws Money; Puts Americans on a Credit Allowance

Washington Outlaws Money; Puts Americans on a Credit Allowance

Washington DC - Your money isn't good here anymore. A new ruling by the Federal Reserve prohibits Americans from "owning, possessing or utilizing" money, in any shape or form, under the threat of life imprisonment. The prohibition is at the heart...

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Funny story: Lords Reform expose poor casting to play out Lucas epic

Lords Reform expose poor casting to play out Lucas epic

Throughout the corridors of power it is well known that the Prime Minister idolises the Star Wars antagonist Lord Vader and for some time many backbenchers have feared this obsession would play out in party politics. Fourteen months since getting...

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Funny story: Over 12 Million New Jobs Found Locked in an Omaha Warehouse

Over 12 Million New Jobs Found Locked in an Omaha Warehouse

Omaha, Nebraska - America's frantic search for new jobs has hit the mother load. A team of Navy SEALs has uncovered and seized a long-forgotten human resource center, containing over 12.4 million private sector jobs. "At 1:09 AM, Greenwich Mean Ti...

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Funny story: Sex, Lies and Inquiries...and Inquiries

Sex, Lies and Inquiries...and Inquiries

An inquiry will be held into the banking scandal after an inquiry into whether or not an inquiry would be necessary found that an inquiry is necessary. The prime minister and Conservative party want a Parliament-led inquiry while Labour have enquired...

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Funny story: Homeland Security Crushes July 4th Terror Plot

Homeland Security Crushes July 4th Terror Plot

New York - After years of burning through trillions of taxpayer dollars, the US Department of Homeland Security has finally scored. The agency shut down an elaborate terrorist operation that would have destroyed the heart of the city on the Fourth of...

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Funny story: Cameron Accused Of Offering 'Jam Tomorrow' Over Europe

Cameron Accused Of Offering 'Jam Tomorrow' Over Europe

David Cameron is facing renewed backbench disquiet over the European Union after he tried and failed to satisfy Conservative demands for a referendum. Conservative MPs warned that the prime minister had not gone far enough by declaring that he wou...

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Funny story: Republicans Unveil a Do-It-Yourself Healthcare Plan

Republicans Unveil a Do-It-Yourself Healthcare Plan

Washington DC - Desperate to take the lead in the nation's never-ending healthcare debate, Congressional Republicans are massing behind an initiative that would provide all Americans with a do-it-yourself medical kit containing everything they need t...

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Funny story: 'Department of Common Sense' Would Rescue America

'Department of Common Sense' Would Rescue America

Washington DC -- A group of activists, academics and other concerned citizens is calling for the creation of a cabinet-level "Department of Common Sense" to improve the quality of decision-making in the nation's capital. "America is in near crisis...

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