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Funny story: Joy as Pope opens condom factory

Joy as Pope opens condom factory

Vatican City, Thursday 4 May 2006 - (ReUterus & Associated Mess): After many decades of theological schizm, humbuggery and dire Pontifical warnings of hellfire and damnation, Pope Joseph Ratzinger has announced that the Vatican is to open its own...

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Funny story: Pope's Easter message: "It's a miracle we got away with it"

Pope's Easter message: "It's a miracle we got away with it"

Vatican City, Italy; Easter Sunday 16 April 2006 -(Associated Mess): An official statement today by the Chief Inquisitor at the Pontifical Prefecture of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith has confirmed that His Infallibility Pope &...

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Funny story: Trey Parker And Matt Stone Quit South Park Over Offensive Episode

Trey Parker And Matt Stone Quit South Park Over Offensive Episode

Trey Parker and Matt Stone have confirmed they are to leave South Park - the controversial cartoon series they created, write and star in - after objecting to the "gratuitously sick, twisted" way a recent episode depicted the Pope and Roman...

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Funny story: Vatican Demands Celibacy in New Priest Doctrine

Vatican Demands Celibacy in New Priest Doctrine

The Vatican has attempted to pacify gay rights groups, it was claimed today, by bravely reiterating its stand against sexually active heterosexuals joining the priesthood, in a draft doctrinal paper approved by the Pope, presented in Rome earlier tod...

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Funny story: Tide of Mersey tears causes ripples in Rome

Tide of Mersey tears causes ripples in Rome

Mr. Socks, a recently deceased three-year old Tabby Cat, today took another step closer to becoming not just the first feline saint, but the holy figure with the shortest recorded gap between death and inauguration by the pope.

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Funny story: Sequel to the Bible is planned by Pope

Sequel to the Bible is planned by Pope

IT was yesterday announced that the Pope and several other religious parties are planning a sequel to bestseller 'The Holy Bible' as part of their Christmas and New Year celebrations. It is expected that Richard Branson's Virgin company w...

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Funny story: Pope Benedict XVI To Change Name To Pope Jesus

Pope Benedict XVI To Change Name To Pope Jesus

The Pope has announced he will change his name after admitting that his current title "Benedict XVI" just isn't "catchy enough to make an impression on the world stage". He now wishes to be addressed instead as "His Holin...

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Funny story: The Pope gets Whoopie Cushioned, Vatican Furious

The Pope gets Whoopie Cushioned, Vatican Furious

"It was so quiet you could hear a Rosary drop" said one witness after Pope Benedict XVI sat down for Christmas Dinner and a loud PFFFFFT rang out. Vatican security is optimistic that they will catch the prankster who keeps playing practic...

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Funny story: Pope Benedict XVI announces he is Santa Claus.

Pope Benedict XVI announces he is Santa Claus.

Vatican City - Yesterday in St. Peters Square, millions were shocked to both hear and see that Pope Benedict XVI is Santa Claus. Wearing a white fur-trimmed red bonnet and a red cape with white underneath, Santa waved to his fans after making...

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Funny story: Simon Cowell launches Pope Idol

Simon Cowell launches Pope Idol

London, England. Music mogul Simon Cowell will judge the latest reality game show to hit the small screen - Pope Idol.The show is sure to be hit, following on from Cowell's previous successes such as Popstars, Pop Idol and The Rabbi Factor.

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Funny story: New York Curmudgeon Wins Nobel Peace Prize

New York Curmudgeon Wins Nobel Peace Prize

Oscar the Grouch of Sesame Street has been named the latest winner of the Nobel Peace Prize, over such dignitaries as the new Pope, the U.N. Secretary General, and lots of other self important people. In a statement by selection committee chairman W...

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Funny story: Catholic Church Poised to Add New Sins To Top Seven

Catholic Church Poised to Add New Sins To Top Seven

Vatican City, Rome -- Precipitated by the recent passing of Pope John Paul II, the Catholic church is currently in the process of re-evaluating its role in the modern world. While the College of Cardinals are presently in seclusion choosing a new Pop...

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Funny story: Blair: Pope should send HIS troops to Northern Ireland

Blair: Pope should send HIS troops to Northern Ireland

London -- Arguing that religious wars should be fought by the faithful, not British soldiers, PM Tony Blair today called on the Vatican and Protestant "hit man" Pat Robertson to send troops to Belfast to either "Put an end to this vio...

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Funny story: Pope Benedict Urges Muslims to Give Up Their Oil to Christian Corporations Like Exxon Mobil

Pope Benedict Urges Muslims to Give Up Their Oil to Christian Corporations Like Exxon Mobil

COLOGNE, Germany (Reuters)-On Saturday, Pope Benedict XVI delivered a blunt message that Islam must give up its oil to America and Christian-Republican oil companies like Exxon Mobil. He said an improvement in relations with Islam "is a vital nece...

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Funny story: Pope Condones Gay Marriages Between Rabbits

Pope Condones Gay Marriages Between Rabbits

Pope Benedict, in his first clear pronouncement on gay marriages since his election, condoned same-sex unions as fabulous expressions of "anarchic freedom" that enhance the richness of the future of the human family. "Look at rabbits, bounc...

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Funny story: Catholic Church Revives Inquisition, Seeks Interview With Dan Brown

Catholic Church Revives Inquisition, Seeks Interview With Dan Brown

THE VATICAN-In a move that has impressed observers with its new Conservative orientation, the Catholic Church under the new Pope Benedict XVl, the former Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, has fully resurrected the medieval Holy Inquisition and assigned it t...

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Funny story: Pope vows to defend Catholic church's 'pro-life' doctrine at Moscow VE Record Turnout

Pope vows to defend Catholic church's 'pro-life' doctrine at Moscow VE Record Turnout

Flanked by President Bush, French President Jacques Chirac and German Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder, Putin accompanied by virtually all other World leaders, listened to a rousing speech by Pope John Paul II and Stalin condemning mass murder, violence...

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