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Funny story: "You're All Fat" Doctors say

"You're All Fat" Doctors say

Doctors have slammed the British population today for being "fat, greedy, drunk layabouts". The news shocked many and there were instances of people falling off their sofa in shock. The spread of obesity is causing concern. "I travel to work on th...

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Funny story: Study Linking Fast Food Restaurants to Strokes, Questioned

Study Linking Fast Food Restaurants to Strokes, Questioned

Nueces County, Texas: An NIH funded study conducted by the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor correlated the number of stroke victims with their proximity to fast food restaurants. A spokeswoman for the National Restaurant Association said "this...

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Funny story: 300-Pound, Chain-Smoking Alcoholic Pill-Popper Afraid Of Dying From Global Warming

300-Pound, Chain-Smoking Alcoholic Pill-Popper Afraid Of Dying From Global Warming

300-Pound, Chain-Smoking Alcoholic Pill-Popper Afraid Of Dying From Global Warming Beaner, Tennessee - Jonnie Ben Johnson, a 41 year old Beaner homemaker, admits that she's petrified by the thought of dying from global warming, saying, "It scares...

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Funny story: Salmanella Heaven In Austin Peanut Plant

Salmanella Heaven In Austin Peanut Plant

Health Inspectors in Austin, Texas have ordered a recall of all products ever shipped from a now-closed a US Peanut plant in Plainview amid a nationwide salmonella outbreak. The order came Thursday evening from the Department of State Health Servi...

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Funny story: More People Inserting Objects Inside Themselves!

More People Inserting Objects Inside Themselves!

According to reports, people of all ages are inserting objects into themselves. While it's been known to happen from time to time, now it seems to be epidemic. Professionals at Nationwide Children's Hospital in Cleveland, Ohio, told an annual meet...

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Funny story: Gland Problem Hypothyroidism Causing Stinking Creek Man To Weigh 475 Pounds

Gland Problem Hypothyroidism Causing Stinking Creek Man To Weigh 475 Pounds

Born with a rare, debilitating glandular disorder plus a hypothyroid problem, 475-pound Stinking Creek resident, Paul Don Henderson helped himself to a fifth serving of fried catfish, mashed potatoes and popped his 21st hush puppy into his pie hole a...

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Funny story: Germs "an urban myth" claim researchers

Germs "an urban myth" claim researchers

Researchers at the University of Lyef on the outskirts of Amsterdam in The Netherlands have published a paper in the New England Journal of Medicine contesting that the generally accepted Germ Theory of Disease is actually wrong. They suggest that...

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Funny story: Doner Kebabs Are Good For You Says Dietician

Doner Kebabs Are Good For You Says Dietician

Following an announcement from the Department Of Health and Wellness that kebab shop punters may just as well swallow two glasses of used cooking oil as have a doner kebab, we were contacted by respected dietician Ali Bullo, who told us: "Is not t...

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Funny story: Government to upgrade aspirin to class A drug

Government to upgrade aspirin to class A drug

Aspirin has been reclassified as a class A drug, introducing the possibility of lifetime imprisonment for anyone caught supplying the former headache suppressant. Home secretary Jacqui Smith cited the "uncertainty" surrounding the effects of the d...

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Funny story: NY Begins Bold Program To Expand Health Care Services To The Underinsured

NY Begins Bold Program To Expand Health Care Services To The Underinsured

NY State Governor David Paterson announced a new plan to expand health care coverage for thousands of under insured New Yorkers. The plan's centerpiece involves the registration and licensure of informal practitioners who currently operate outside th...

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Funny story: Jelly Fills In

Jelly Fills In

Since peanut butter is not currently a favored food source for Americans, jelly is stepping up to fill in, in more ways than one. Many people who are accustomed to covering both slices of bread with something are simply doubling up on the jelly, but...

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Funny story: Local Doctor Reprimanded

Local Doctor Reprimanded

Bloomertown's Community Health Department announced today that it was investigating claims that local Doctor John, actually visited a patient in her own home, to carry out an examination. The patient, an elderly woman with no transport who had bee...

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Funny story: Cure for Alzheimer's

Cure for Alzheimer's

In a combined UK/US study, Vitamin D has been found to stop the effects of Alzheimer's. The US section of the study investigated 20,000 old people and compared the effects of Vitamin D supplements in a double-blind trial. The British part of th...

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Funny story: Germ-Free People Get Sick More Often

Germ-Free People Get Sick More Often

Recent surveys of people in one different office building reveals that people who are "clean freaks" are more likely to come down with the common cold. It seems that all of that killing of microscopic parasites isn't always the healthiest way to g...

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Funny story: A New Muffin

A New Muffin

Today, SuperHealth Bakery released its new 700,000 grain muffin. CEO Tom Baker said "we have been working on this muffin for years." It has 700,000 different grains, so it took years just to collect them. It has 100,000 times anyone's daily recommend...

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Funny story: Health Department to issue warnings on rota basis

Health Department to issue warnings on rota basis

The Department of Health has announced that from March 1st 2009, health warnings for certain foods and drinks will be issued on a rota basis to save time. For example, during March butter will be bad for you, but good all April, bad again May etc. Re...

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Funny story: Daft Bastard Lands Stricken Hot Air Balloon On Concrete Playground - Breaks Head

Daft Bastard Lands Stricken Hot Air Balloon On Concrete Playground - Breaks Head

Hot air balloon pilot, Billy Sollocks of Basingstoke, Hants, frequently described as a 'daft bastard' by work colleagues earlier today narrowly averted complete disaster when, after losing control of his hot air balloon in the skies somewhere near Ba...

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