In an ad-hoc service hastily cobbled together by the Vatican, the Pope has sensationally made Bollywood star, Shilpa Shetty, a saint and at the same time drummed racist bully Jade, out of his gang. The Pontiff told us backstage after the gig:...
Vatican City - (Rue Uterus): Pope Ratzinger is said to be suffering from encyclical depression after being dumped by internet satire sites following his well-publicised rant last November that everybody was poking fun at his Nazi origins and defaming...
First century bas relief sculptures of Roman gladiators were found by Italy's version of Scotland Yard this week, while digging in the "backhouse" (Italian for outside toilet) of Roman Cardinal Guiseppe Pedophiliano.
The Vatican was forced to issue an apology yesterday after the Pope was photographed befouling a public phone box in St Peter's Square.
Vatican City - (Ass Mess): Pope Joseph Ratzinger is to take the lead role of Satan in a new lavish opera by Vatican composer Monsignor Marco Frisina based on Dante's Divine Comedy provisionally entitled "Hell Hath No Fury".
Vatican City (AP) Priests all over the world celebrated as Pope Benedict XVI announced today that Catholic priests will now be allowed to receive fellatio and administer cunnilingus. This is in keeping with the Pope's "modernization" of...
Vatican City - (Ass Mess): Pope Joseph Ratinger has issued an official plea for Saddam's death sentence to be commuted to life imprisonment with hard labour in one of the Pontifical Office's maximum security latrines located under the city...
As part of his drive to involve the 'yoof' into the modern church, the Pope will today include a section of his Christmas blessing in a rap specially written for him by English rap combo, The Incontinence Crew.
Pope Benedict XVI has announced a new sponsorship deal with chav's favourite Burberry and from now on we can expect to see His Holiness's gold and crimson vestments being dumped in favour of the brown plaid so beloved of skinheads and dolts t...
In a sequence of events that might have come straight out of madcap religious comedy 'Father Ted', Brian Parker from Croydon near London, was last week elected Pope for a day by The Conclave Of Cardinals in the Vatican.
The Pope was being interviewed by police last night after the Vatican admitted that they made the whole thing up.
Rome - (ReUterus & Associated Mess): Pope Joseph Ratzinger has won this year's prestigious literary award for the worst example of erotica in his seminal autobiographical oeuvre 'Sixty-nine Something'.
The Christian world was shocked to its religious roots, today, when the Catholic Church announced that Pope Benedict XVI had been sacked for wearing a cross at work. The Pope had apparently been warned before that the likely consequence of his blatan...
Rome - (ReUterus): Italian newspapers are fuming that Pope Joseph Ratzinger has expressed disgust at satirical sites such as The Spoof! that lampoon his boyhood Nazi allegiances and Uncle Fester-like beady eyes.
Vatican City - (Associated Mess): The apocalyptical Third Secret of Fatima came tantalisingly close to fulfillment yesterday with the announcement that Pope JP1 will be canonised because the prophecy's prediction that Nazis in the Curia will '...
After taking Sodium Pentathol for a minor surgical procedure and serving three masses with liberal doses of wine, Pope Benedict XVI held a press conference and admitted the Bible is "just a load of crap" and that the Vatican exists only to...
Vatican City - (AssoCIAted Mess): Claims that Pope JP2 Lodge once appeared in a vision to President George Bush Senior - prophesying that his namesake would one day be elected the US President who triumphed victoriously in the Whore Against Terra i...
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