(WASHINGTON) Confirming rumors that have been swirling from the Beltway to Baghdad for months, White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan and Coalition Provisional Authority adviser and spokesman Dan Senor acknowledged their plans to tie the knot la...
WASHINGTON -- President Bush's ghost-like military career hasn't stopped his team from stink-bombing John Kerry about the medals he won in Vietnam. But now new allegations have emerged regarding President Bush's service in uniform, this time invol...
May 16, 2004 (Washington, DC) -...
Washington DC - Shocking news out of the capitol today as America gets set to celebrate 50 years of integrated schools brought on by the landmark Brown v. Board of Education. In what can only be described as unprecedented, the Supreme C...
(Washington, D.C. -- The Pentagon) American military planners, led by the Joint Chiefs of Staff announced early today that American strategy in Afghanistan would change. At a briefing by the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs, Air Force General Richard B...
Washington, DC -- John "Big Head" Kerry has decided that it's high time he steps in and fixes the messes of the Bush administrat...
Washington, D.C. -- President George W. Bush held a press conference today that will go down as one of the strangest moments in U.S. history. After a few opening remarks by his Press Secretary, the President took the podium, looked around for a mome...
Washington, D.C. -- President Bush astounded supporters, local ministers and staff at a prayer breakfast this morning when he stood suddenly, looked about as if in a daze, and began spouting what sounded like gibberish to those present.
Washington -- The world was stunned today when President George W. Bush was found to be in possession of the One Ring to Rule Them All.
WASHINGTON - Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld spent his Friday on Capitol Hill answering questions concerning Adobe Photoshop misuse by U.S. military personnel in Iraq, and he announced he had already banned use of the program until all tr...
WASHINGTON (FP) - Money grubbing capitalists added 288,000 jobs to their payrolls in April as the nation's unemployment rate slipped to 5.6 percent, forcing urban survivalists (homeless hobos) to abandon any and all excuses and actually go to wor...
Washington DC - Last week, Matthew Lesko was taken into custody by FBI agents. Lesko was unavailable for comment, however FBI representative Chambers had this to say: "Mr. Lesko has been soliciting government secrets for years. Right under our n...
Washington, DC -- Today, President Bush apologized for the abuse scandal after taking an urgent phone call from famed celebrity apologist, Just...
Washington - During an early afternoon press conference today, President George W. Bush's attention was suddenly caught and diverted by a large chocolate cake at the nearby refreshments table.
Washington - Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld today announced the hiring of a new Chief of Detainee Operations. Secretary Rumsfeld held a press conference in which he named Bobo the gorilla Chief of Operations for Gitmo and all prison facilities...
Washington - Grant Hibbard, one of the commanders who wrote a glowing evaluation of John Kerry 36-years ago, now a Republican, is questioning whether Mr. Kerry deserved one of the three Purple Hearts he received as a result of a shrapnel wound in Vi...
Washington - President George W. Bush showed up totally shitfaced for a press conference earlier this week, sources say.
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