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Funny satire stories about Football (American)

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Funny story: Rush Limbaugh Wants To Buy The St. Louis Rams

Rush Limbaugh Wants To Buy The St. Louis Rams

ST. LOUIS - Radio political commentator Rush Limbaugh has expressed an interest in purchasing the NFL St. Louis Rams. Limbaugh stated that he has always dreamed of owning a professional sports team, but not the Detroit Lions who last year went 0-1...

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Funny story: Detroit Lions' Only Fan Calls It Quits After Sunday's Crushing Defeat

Detroit Lions' Only Fan Calls It Quits After Sunday's Crushing Defeat

DETROIT, MICHIGAN - When the Detroit Lions had their first win in nearly two years - a 19-14 defeat of the Washington Redskins on September 27 - Harry Havisham was there to rejoice in the moment. In fact, he was the only fan in Ford Field that day,...

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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders In Alleged Bank Robbery

Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders In Alleged Bank Robbery

Police in Denver, Colorado have issued arrest warrants for six cheerleaders after a daring raid on a city bank this morning, in which 16 customers were assaulted, and three more had their faces sat on. The incident came only hours after the Dallas...

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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Lose: Jessica Simpson Says, "Ya See It Wasn't Me After all Was It?"

Dallas Cowboys Lose: Jessica Simpson Says, "Ya See It Wasn't Me After all Was It?"

DENVER - The Denver Broncos improved their record to 4-0 with a 17-10 win over the Dallas Cowboys who fell to 2-2. The Cowboys cannot blame the mile high altitude, or the snow, or the fact that the Denver fans just happen to cheer louder than most...

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Funny story: The Detroit Lions Finally Win A Game!

The Detroit Lions Finally Win A Game!

DETROIT - The fans of the NFL Detroit Lions have finally been treated to a rare rarity - Their beloved Lions have won a football game. After going for 21 months without winning a game the Lions defeated the Washington Redskins 19-14 snapping their...

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Funny story: The NAACP Wants Washington To Drop The Redskins Name

The NAACP Wants Washington To Drop The Redskins Name

INDIAN HILLS, Colorado - The NAACP, which stands for The National Association for the Advancement of Chiefs and Papooses has sent a petition to the owner of the NFL Washington Redskins demanding that he change the name of his football team. Toby R...

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Funny story: Plaxico Burress' Next Pass Receptions Will Be In Prison

Plaxico Burress' Next Pass Receptions Will Be In Prison

NEW YORK CITY - Plaxico Burress the New York Giants receiver who caught the winning touchdown in the 2008 Super Bowl has just been sentenced to two years in prison and so his next football receptions will be in New York state's Sing Sing Prison. T...

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Funny story: Tony Romo Breaks NFL Records in New Cowboy Stadium Debut

Tony Romo Breaks NFL Records in New Cowboy Stadium Debut

The Dallas Cowboys officially opened their new stadium to the public in a Sunday Night NFL game against division rival The New York Giants. The new $1.15 billion dollar sports complex is the most expensive ever built and the crowd for the opening (o...

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Funny story: Chargers win with new midget toss play

Chargers win with new midget toss play

Oakland, CA - The Chargers beat the Raiders tonight by tossing a midget holding a football far over the defensive line, who then landed on his feet and crossed the goal line after a short run, on short legs. The coach of the Raiders was available af...

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Funny story: Scouting Report: Packers Hold Promise This Year

Scouting Report: Packers Hold Promise This Year

Poised on the brink of a new season, the Green Bay Packers hold more promise this year than any of the past ten. With several meaty linebackers, an impressive front line, and a solid performer at quarterback, they are sure to make their mark: WR,JAKE ALLEN, #13, makes quite an impression with his shoulder length dreadlocks and pencil thin mustache. This 6'4",196 lbs. graduate from Mississippi...

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Funny story: TV Report: Pro Football Season Opens Tonight

TV Report: Pro Football Season Opens Tonight

Detroit MI: Hello sports fans this is Kevin of KCAR TV, broadcasting from the media booth at Ford Field. Tonight the 2009 American Football season kicks off with the Detroit Kibitzers Vs the St Louis Nudniks. As many local lions may remember from the 2008 season, the home team didn't win a single game! To liven things up a bit I have asked the lovely Britney to join me and describe some of the...

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Funny story: Ohio State Preempts Outcome, Forfeits to Southern California

Ohio State Preempts Outcome, Forfeits to Southern California

Columbus, Ohio - Confused fans watched in disbelief as Ohio State head coach Jim Tressel surrendered to Southern California head coach Pete Carroll in Ohio Stadium well in advance of the two teams scheduled match-up on Saturday. "I just figured I...

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Funny story: Lola McCola has National Football Star Arrested

Lola McCola has National Football Star Arrested

SAN DIEGO, CA - National Football linebacker Shawne Merrihands was arrested early Sunday for allegedly choking his chicken in front of reality show star Lola McCola, police said. Authorities responded to a call at about 3:45 a.m. Sunday from a wom...

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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys To Adopt Malcolm McClaren 'Cowboys Cocks' Logo

Dallas Cowboys To Adopt Malcolm McClaren 'Cowboys Cocks' Logo

The NFL's Dallas Cowboys, better known as America's Team, are to make a change to their famous logo on their helmets this season, dispensing with their traditional Blue One-star crest, and replacing it with Sex Pistols' manager Malcolm McClaren's inf...

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Funny story: The Punch & Break Heard Around Boise

The Punch & Break Heard Around Boise

BOISE, Idaho -- An ugly performance by Oregon in a 19-8 loss at Boise State on Thursday night turned uglier immediately after the game when Duck senior running back LeGarrette Blount broke his hand after punching Bronco linebacker Byron Hout. Blo...

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Funny story: Brett Favre To Attend Anger Management Classes

Brett Favre To Attend Anger Management Classes

MINNEAPOLIS - Minnesota Vikings quarterback Brett Lorenzo Favre (pronounced Farve) has agreed to enter into an anger management program. The program called 'Getting Pissed Off Can Be A Real Pisser' meets once a week on Sunday afternoons at a downt...

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Funny story: Vikings Quarterback Brett Favre In One Hell Of A Mess!

Vikings Quarterback Brett Favre In One Hell Of A Mess!

HOUSTON - Texas Rangers Rufus Cutshaw and Dusty Youngwood took Minnesota Vikings quarterback Brett Favre into custody immediately following the Vikings 17 to 10 victory over the Houston Texans on Monday Night Football. Cutshaw said that a complain...

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