WASHINGTON, DC -- While addressing a meeting of the Office of Drug Control Policy (ODCP), health specialist Jacqui Chan warned of a potential epidemic of abusing what she called the next meth or crack cocaine, jenken.
A pre-recorded episode of the often controversial Rikki Lake Show featuring Jesus Christ confronting God is due to air early next week.
National Poisons Unit, Aldermaston - (Ludicrous Mess): A new strain of eco-friendly weed variant of super-strength quick-grow skunk cannabis has been found to have drastically lower CO2 emissions compared to average cannabis sativa products according...
YupTup Utah - Walcolm Inc., the worlds largest drug manufacturer, has produced a drug that fights depression or can cause depression.
Bogota - (AssoCIAted Mess): Russian Secret Service cocaine smugglers scuttled yet another of their Bloodyvostock-engineered Barrakuda-class submarines off Colombia's Pacific coast today blaming uneven freight distribution that caused the...
The entertainment world was shocked to hear that Jamie Lynn Spears was pregnant and now it turns out that they are to be shocked once again with the startling revelation that her sister Britney secretly impregnated her
London - (Narcotic Mess): The MoD has said that it regularly weeds out freelance drug-dealers poaching on its hard-won turf.
BOSTON - After 20 months of sniffing around the fetid locker rooms of major league baseball, George Mitchell did more than just uncover the use of steroids among some of baseball's greatest star players.
Police in New York City were called the scene of a bizarre domestic incident involving Republican candidate Rudy Giuliani and his doped-up pet pony, Miss Pretty.
GOLDEN VALLEY, MN - For years, parents have believed what they were giving their children for breakfast were completely innocent, nutritious, and healthy, sugar-laden cereals. Anti-drug activists, however, have revealed that those naive parents were...
A drug company has announced today that it will be releasing to the market the new drug Driagra to cure temporary fluid congestion in the testicles and prostate region, a condition more commonly known as Massive Sperm Buildup (MSB) or Blue Balls.
Hollywood legend Jack Nicholson is to get a once off Holiday special TV talk show where he interviews friends while under the influence of narcotics.
This week beings the biggest sporting event since the "pass the parcel world championships" in August. Sources say that a record number of alcohol and drugs will be consumed throughout this prestigious event including Jim Bowen's favour...
Former Wimbledon champion Martina Hingis officially announced her retirement from tennis after her original and back up samples from this year's tournament tested positive for cocaine. She stated that the long suspension time and legal battles t...
Buckingham Palace, London: (Constitutional Mess): A sex, drugs and blackmail plot to oust the Puppet Monarch has resulted in a dawn raid on a Buckingham Palace crack den according to police reports.
NEW YORK, NY -- A pharmaceutical giant made an announcement earlier today that will likely change history.
Cricklewood, London - (Rotters): Nobel prize winner Doris Lessing played a blinder this week accepting the prestigious literature gong for a lifetime of humbug and denial about some murky DNA secrets lurking in her personal closet.
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