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Funny satire stories about Donald Trump

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Funny story: Congress Moves to Lift Marijuana Restrictions

Congress Moves to Lift Marijuana Restrictions

The House and Senate are putting out an additional phase 5 legislation to help Americans reduce stress while facing long term "stay at home policies". "Hell, I can get joints like they were legal anyway," said Senator "The Turtle" McConnell, of Ke...

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Funny story: President Trump Doubles Down on “Injecting Disinfectant” with Additional Advice

President Trump Doubles Down on “Injecting Disinfectant” with Additional Advice

(Washington, DC) President Trump recently defended his statement that Americans could help slow the spread of the Coronavirus by injecting disinfectants at yesterday’s daily Coronavirus Task Force press briefing by offering up additional advice that...

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Funny story: A Leading Disinfectant Company Says Please, Please, Please Do Not Listen To President Trump

A Leading Disinfectant Company Says Please, Please, Please Do Not Listen To President Trump

CLEVELAND, Ohio – The Duchess Disinfecting Company has stated that their cleaning products are powerful cleaning disinfectants and they should never, ever be ingested orally or otherwise. The company’s Chief Director of Public Relations, Olivia Ti...

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Funny story: President Trump Says He Will Be Filing a Personal Lawsuit Against China for Causing the Coronavirus

President Trump Says He Will Be Filing a Personal Lawsuit Against China for Causing the Coronavirus

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The man who has sued more people than anyone else in the entire nation, has just stated that his latest one is a doozy. President Trump, the undisputed leader of the free world, has just remarked that he has instructed his lawsu...

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Funny story: President Trump Says Pandas Are Responsible For Covid-19

President Trump Says Pandas Are Responsible For Covid-19

President Donald Trump put another spanner in the spokes of already-frail US/China relations this morning, when he blamed the Coronavirus outbreak on the pandas at Beijing Zoo. The zoo has nineteen pandas, and, as a treasured specie, they are kept...

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Funny story: Trump suggests donkey penises cure COVID-19

Trump suggests donkey penises cure COVID-19

At his daily Whitehouse COVID-19 briefing yesterday President Donald Trump says he has a good idea how to beat the virus. "You know this COVUD-18 bug thing, it's done a tremendous, very, very, great lot of damage to people around the world, tremen...

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Funny story: Trump's Top Coronavirus Medical Recommendations

Trump's Top Coronavirus Medical Recommendations

Declaring himself the most qualified medical expert in the world, President Trump dismissed the Food and Drug Administration, (FDA) Administrator and appointed himself the new FDA Chief. During his four-hour news conference, where he asked and answe...

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Funny story: Trump admits gargling with Formaldehyde

Trump admits gargling with Formaldehyde

President Trump admitted, today, he often gargles with Formaldehyde in order to preserve his brain. He said that a leading brain surgeon from North Korea had given him the tip, during a conference call to Kim Jung Un. "Oh yeah, it's really helped...

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Funny story: President Trump Tells Harvard University It Better Return The $9 Milllion Emergency Relief Check Within 48 Hours

President Trump Tells Harvard University It Better Return The $9 Milllion Emergency Relief Check Within 48 Hours

WASHINGTON, D.C. – White House insiders say that the president is fit to be tied over the fact that Harvard University received a huge government check. When he first learned about the money given to one of the wealthiest universities in the world...

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Funny story: Members of the Never Trump Organization Say That None of Them Have Received Their $1,200 Economic Impact Checks

Members of the Never Trump Organization Say That None of Them Have Received Their $1,200 Economic Impact Checks

WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump has said that the $1,200 Economic Impact Checks have all been mailed out. A spokesman for the anti-Trump group calling itself the Never-Trump Organization told the media that none of their more than 65,000 member...

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Funny story: Trump Assures Americans that They’ll Be Able to Return to Their Crappy Low-Paying Jobs without Health Insurance Soon

Trump Assures Americans that They’ll Be Able to Return to Their Crappy Low-Paying Jobs without Health Insurance Soon

With the end of the national COVID-19 lockdown in sight, United States President Donald Trump reassured Americans currently unemployed as a result of coronavirus-related business shutdowns that they will be able to return to their crappy, low-paying...

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Funny story: Kim Jong Un Transferred to US Walter Reed Hospital in Late Night Rescue Mission

Kim Jong Un Transferred to US Walter Reed Hospital in Late Night Rescue Mission

(Bethesda, MD) Under direct orders from President Trump, North Korea’s president, Kim Jong Un, was airlifted out of the country’s capital city in a late-night rescue mission, and flown to the United States, where he was admitted to the Walter Reed Ar...

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Funny story: Nicolle Wallace Says She is Afraid That President Trump is Heading for a Nervous Breakdown

Nicolle Wallace Says She is Afraid That President Trump is Heading for a Nervous Breakdown

NEW YORK CITY - Nicolle Wallace served as communications director under President George W. Bush. The former staunch Republican woman says that she has had her fill of DJT, who she opines is 73 going on 3. Wallace, said that she is afraid that...

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Funny story: Conservative News Mogul Matt Drudge Says He Doesn’t Like President Trump Trying to Boss Him Around

Conservative News Mogul Matt Drudge Says He Doesn’t Like President Trump Trying to Boss Him Around

MIAMI – One of Trump’s biggest supporters seems to have turned on his once-upon-a-time hero. Matt Drudge, of the famed conservative site The Drudge Report, says that he does not like the president telling him what to print and what not to print.

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Funny story: Trump announces Strategic Toilet Roll Stockpile

Trump announces Strategic Toilet Roll Stockpile

In his daily COVID-19 address to the nation, President Donald Trump announced plans to assemble a U S. strategic stockpile of toilet rolls to deal with future pandemics. Speaking from his private, 20-feet by 20-feet White House toilet stateroom w...

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Funny story: President Trump Wants His Base to Donate Their Coronavirus Stimulus Checks To His Re-Election Campaign

President Trump Wants His Base to Donate Their Coronavirus Stimulus Checks To His Re-Election Campaign

WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump stated at his daily C-19 Press Conference/Campaign Pep Rally that he hopes everyone appreciates that he has just given them a very nice monetary present. Trump stuck out his chest and said that he wants to show h...

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Funny story: Trump Moves To Solve Toilet Paper Shortage, Uses War Powers Act to Order 300 Million Squat Toilets

Trump Moves To Solve Toilet Paper Shortage, Uses War Powers Act to Order 300 Million Squat Toilets

Donald Trump has ordered Avon to construct 300 million Asian squat toilets for the American public to use, in lieu of solving the toilet paper shortage by ordering more factories to output toilet paper lines. In many countries that use squat toilets,...

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