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Funny story: The Beginner's Guide Part 4: Ten Things To Know About Travel

The Beginner's Guide Part 4: Ten Things To Know About Travel

Hello and welcome to the fourth in our Beginner's Guide series. In this edition we are talking about travel. Since man could first walk, he has wandered freely, seeking out adventure and experience to broaden the mind. From the classic family holiday to the trans-Atlantic business trip, travel has become a much needed part of the day to day dealings of the human race. Whether you are p...

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Funny story: The Beginner's Guide Special Edition: Ten Things To Know About Dorking

The Beginner's Guide Special Edition: Ten Things To Know About Dorking

Due to the popularity of our 'Beginner's Guide' series, we have decided to print a selection of periodicals covering more specific subjects. Currently in the making is our 'Season's' selection, and we will also be publishing certain topical items, the first of which is our 'Halloween' special. Look out for these soon. But the first of our Special Edition's is devoted to Dorking. That histori...

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Funny story: Chaos As Dover Port Closed For An Hour

Chaos As Dover Port Closed For An Hour

The gates to the shores of Great Britain were sensationally closed yesterday for over an hour, causing turmoil amongst incoming and outgoing travellers and throwing the transport system in to chaos - over a biro. Port Authority employee Tony Weeks...

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Funny story: Talk Strange To Be Understood Abroad, Says Expert

Talk Strange To Be Understood Abroad, Says Expert

English tourists are being advised by a travel expert to adopt bizarre accents if they want to be understood by waiters and sales staff abroad. EIF News & Features' Travel Editor Peregrine Trip reckons the traditional method of making yourself...

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Funny story: All Aboard!

All Aboard!

I got on board the AMTRAK train to New York at New Carrollton as I normally do. Walking down the aisle wheeling my carry-on luggage with one hand and holding my coffee and blueberry Danish in the other, I spotted my old friend Joe. Even though he was wearing Ray Ban sunglasses, there was no mistaking his big, broad smile. Joe and I had spent many hours together on AMTRAK - Joe going to Delaware...

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Funny story: ITV Snubs Top Travel Writer Over New Series

ITV Snubs Top Travel Writer Over New Series

A top writer is furious at being passed over by ITV who have commissioned three new travel programmes. ITV Daytime have ordered celebrity travelogues by Adrian Admondson, Ade In Britain, and Dick Strawbridge, the boat-based Hungry Sailors, while a...

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Funny story: I Don't Feel it's Time for Me to Stop Travelling, You Know?

I Don't Feel it's Time for Me to Stop Travelling, You Know?

Hey there! I was sitting around the other day, at my parents, rolling a fat one, and I just thought to myself - "I'm not just not ready to stop travelling yet, I think I'll head off to Asia or the Pacific or something." I was comparing the life I had last year, when I was backpacking around Egypt to the one I have now, you know, trying to find a job, get a bond together to move out of my par...

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Funny story: My Favourite Slut Walks by Sir Digby Herring-Bone Sweater No 24. Croydon-On-The-Lash

My Favourite Slut Walks by Sir Digby Herring-Bone Sweater No 24. Croydon-On-The-Lash

Each week we join Sir Digby Herringbone-Sweater as he takes us on one of his famous Slut Walks. This week, Sir Digby discovers the cultural high watermark that is Croydon-On-The-Lash and its environs. I step off the rickety tram (a charming hallmark of a bygone era) alighting on the outskirts of East Croydon station, wondering what sights I will behold on this, my latest Slut Walk? I can barel...

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Funny story: Conference North to cover a bigger area than the Conference National

Conference North to cover a bigger area than the Conference National

The Conference North, the second tier of non-league football has been expanded to include Bishop Stortford. Bishop Stortford is the town in which London Stanstead Airport is located. "It's a bit ridiculous," said Alan Carlisle, chairman of Working...

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Funny story: Obama and Cameron Launch International Brotherhood Campaign

Obama and Cameron Launch International Brotherhood Campaign

In a further attempt to bridge the gap between U.S. and U.K. cultures and their respective citizenry, Prime Minister David Cameron has announced the "Have a Bloke and a Smile" campaign. President Barack Obama has also picked a director of goodwill c...

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Funny story: Gloucester - Strangers In A Strange Land

Gloucester - Strangers In A Strange Land

Peregrine Trip investigates the West Country cathedral city… I stared intently at the map, but I just was not seeing. For the life of me, I could not locate Bristol Road. So, feeling rather foolish, I asked the thick-set lad at reception who was trying to give me directions: "I'm sorry, but which is Bristol Road? I know… I'm sorry… it's stupid but I just can't see it." The pair of recepti...

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Funny story: Saudi Arabia: A Travel Guide

Saudi Arabia: A Travel Guide

Not many people would consider Saudi Arabia as a potential holiday destination. However, travellers who ignore it could be missing out on a surprising country which on the surface appears to offer little, but actually delivers. One of the main cities is Mecca, which is a historically important Islamic city. Indeed, it has become something of a mecca for Muslim pilgrims. There are other citie...

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Funny story: Palin Signs Up For New BBC Series

Palin Signs Up For New BBC Series

Globe trotting presenter Michael Palin has revealed that his latest in a long line of travel documentaries will be based in Brazil. Called "Hovel To Hovel : Around The Favelas In 80 Minutes", the ex Monty Python star's newest enterprise will featu...

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Funny story: Antwerp, Art & Ale - A Traveller's Diary

Antwerp, Art & Ale - A Traveller's Diary

Travel editor Peregrin Trip visits the historic Belgian port... Magnificent! Antwerp Central railway station - truly magnificent. What a temple to the glory days of rail travel! Antwerpen Centraal was clearly designed to demonstrate that the latter-day burghers' ambition and civic pride were just as great as their medieval forefathers who built its more ancient and holier compatriot down the...

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Funny story: Industrial Action On Railways Imminent

Industrial Action On Railways Imminent

Rail travellers in the U.K. are steeling themselves for disruption with the news that Arriva Trains will be striking in Wales and parts of England next week. Although workers have been offered a 12% increase over the next 2 years, union sources cl...

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Funny story: Royal Family Seeks Travel Expert

Royal Family Seeks Travel Expert

Buckingham Palace is advertising for a new "head of travel" to help the Royal Family cut costs and reduce their carbon footprint. The post, worth between £55,000 and £75,000, is advertised on the family's web site. A palace insider said: "Membe...

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Funny story: Travel Advice Relaxed for Egypt

Travel Advice Relaxed for Egypt

The Foreign Office's previous instructions advising "essential travel only" for Egyptian destinations such as Cairo, Alexandria and Suez, has finally been relaxed. The warnings has been put in place in the wake of widespread unrest and civil dist...

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