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Funny satire stories about kentucky derby

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Funny story: Eight Bells Trainer Denies Steroid Use

Eight Bells Trainer Denies Steroid Use

Larry Jones, trainer for Kentucky Derby runner up Eight Bells who tragically snapped both front ankles after her remarkable Churchill Downs dash, categorically denied steroid use by the fallen filly.

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Funny story: Kentucky Derby Opens Dog Food Company

Kentucky Derby Opens Dog Food Company

One of the grandest social events surrounding sport, southern gentility and pie-eyed patrons adrift in a sea of mint julep has taken a surprising turn for the pragmatic.

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Funny story: Big 'Gordon' Brown wins Kentucky Derby

Big 'Gordon' Brown wins Kentucky Derby

Big 'Gordon' Brown today won the Kentucky with a blistering display of moving quickly round a bit of grass.

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Funny story: 2002 Kentucky Derby winner Whore Emblem can't get it up for Japanese fillies

2002 Kentucky Derby winner Whore Emblem can't get it up for Japanese fillies

Hokkaido, Japan - (Horse-bollox Mess): Fabled 2002 Kentucky Derby winner Whore Emblem has gone lame in the matrimonial stakes at his Shadai Stallion Station Japanese stud farm home.

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Funny story: Dutrow bullish about Big Brown superstar

Dutrow bullish about Big Brown superstar

Louisville, Kentucky - (Thoroughbred Mess): Unbeaten 3/1 Kentucky derby favorite Big Brown is the bees' knees' to trainer Rick Dutrow who has dismissed kiss-of-death fears for the colt's outside draw of stall number 20 as nothing more tha...

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Funny story: Dubai's Shaikh McTomb-Raider desperate to buy awesome Kentucky Derby contender Big Brown

Dubai's Shaikh McTomb-Raider desperate to buy awesome Kentucky Derby contender Big Brown

Louisville, Kentucky - (Thoroughbred Mess): A couple of former Off-the-Wall-Street investment bankers-turned racing fanatics are chuffed to bits this weekend.

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Funny story: Economy tumbles, sports writers take the fall

Economy tumbles, sports writers take the fall

Rising gas prices and a tight economy have caused businesses to close or layoff workers, but the situation became even more dire on Tuesday when the nation's sports writers realized that their travel budgets and expense allowances have been slash...

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Funny story: Kentucky Derby Champion Mired In Drug Scandal

Kentucky Derby Champion Mired In Drug Scandal

NEW JERSEY - The 'Sport of Kings' was rocked by scandal on Sunday as allegations of drug use by Kentucky Derby winner Street Sense surfaced.

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Funny story: Queen Attends Kentucky Derby

Queen Attends Kentucky Derby

The Queen fulfilled one of her lifelong ambitions at the weekend, when she partook of a meal at Kentucky Fried Chicken. Her Majesty had been past outlets on numerous occasions, but had never actually sampled the culi...

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Funny story: Queen Elizabeth in massive 50/1 chance Imawildandcrazyguy Kentucky Derby gamble

Queen Elizabeth in massive 50/1 chance Imawildandcrazyguy Kentucky Derby gamble

Louisville, Kentucky - (Ass Mess): 50/1 Kentucky Derby no-hoper Imawildandcrazyguy has been the subject of a massive royal punt today amid reports that Queen Elizabeth has taken advantage of the ludicrously high pound/dollar exchange rate to back the...

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Funny story: Kentucky Derby Results Announced

Kentucky Derby Results Announced

Results of this year's Kentucky Derby have been announced and bettors are upset with the finish. Queen Elizabeth II of Great Britain, who went off at 263 to 1 odds, won the race by the length of a hatpin.

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Funny story: Queen Elizabeth in Kentucky For Kentucky Derby

Queen Elizabeth in Kentucky For Kentucky Derby

Queen Elizabeth arrived in Louisville, Kentucky for the running of the Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs. The monarch is making her sixth official visity to the United States and her first to the world's most famous horserace.

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Funny story: Kentucky Derby betting hots up amid Queen Elizabeth visit rumors

Kentucky Derby betting hots up amid Queen Elizabeth visit rumors

Kentucky - (Ass Mess): As a huge wall of money began flooding the betting market ahead of Saturday's running of the 133rd Kentucky Derby ante-post odds have begun some dramatic fluctuations amid reports that a massive corruption scandal is about...

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Funny story: Williams, Jones to begin world tour

Williams, Jones to begin world tour

Former NFL running back Ricky Williams and 2004 Kentucky Derby winner Smarty Jones will tour the world, representatives announced.

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Funny story: Smarty Jones Arrested After Preakness Victory

Smarty Jones Arrested After Preakness Victory

Kentucky Derby and Preakness winner Smarty Jones was arrested early Sunday morning outside a downtown Baltimore Night club and charged with public drunkenness, lewd behavior and resisting arrest. The three-year-old thoroughbred was spotted by office...

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Funny story: Eaton Road Kill, 175-1 Non-Thoroughbred, Wins Kentucky Derby

Eaton Road Kill, 175-1 Non-Thoroughbred, Wins Kentucky Derby

(Louisville, Kentucky) For the first time in the 129-year history of America's most famous horse race, the Kentucky Derby has been won by a horse who is neither a thoroughbred, nor, for that matter, three years old.

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Funny story: Omarosa in the Derby after two drop out

Omarosa in the Derby after two drop out

Louisville, KY-If you thought this year's Kentucky Derby would be another Bob Baffert waltz ‘round the turns, grab you horse beating rods because it's about to get rough.

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