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Funny story: New Mitten Diet Guarantees Weight Loss

New Mitten Diet Guarantees Weight Loss

In an exhaustive study performed in 5 different cities across the U.S. and Canada, Doctors and nutritionists have proven that the constant wearing of winter mittens immediately promotes significant weight loss. Aside from the obvious difficult att...

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Funny story: Vast majority of dieters wrongly blame hormonal changes for weight re-gain, study

Vast majority of dieters wrongly blame hormonal changes for weight re-gain, study

HARFOLD, Vt.--Some 80% of dieters regain the weight they've lost within a year. According to a study released earlier this week by Harfold State College, some 99.9% of those dieters blame hormonal changes for the return of flab. Coincidently, the...

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Funny story: Fat Buster busted for cheating

Fat Buster busted for cheating

Claire Buoyant has become the first person to ever be banned from Fat Busters, the weight-loss program. "We had to ask her not to come any more," said Chief Fat Buster, Wayne Station. "She looked like she wasn't losing any weight, but each week, s...

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Funny story: Geri Halliwell Pictures Spark Bikini Debate

Geri Halliwell Pictures Spark Bikini Debate

Women across the country have revealed they do no feel "bikini ready" after pictures in the press showed former Spice Girl Geri Halliwell displaying her 'perfect 10' body in a green two-piece. The average woman is a size 14 and weighs 10st 5lb, bu...

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Funny story: Kirstie Alley Says That Being On Dancing With The Stars Has Helped Her Go Down To A Size 6 - Hmmm

Kirstie Alley Says That Being On Dancing With The Stars Has Helped Her Go Down To A Size 6 - Hmmm

HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Kirstie Alley has said that she was actually thrilled at the fact that she managed to make it all the way to The Dancing With The Stars finals and end up finishing number two. Alley and her partner, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, aka "The Bad Boy of The Ballroom," were beaten by Pittsburgh Steelers wide receiver Hines Ward and his pro partner Australia's Kym Johnson. Kirstie entered...

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Funny story: Revolutionary weightloss program requires no calorie counting or exercise

Revolutionary weightloss program requires no calorie counting or exercise

A revolutionary new diet has been revealed by the Science Department at Weightlookers that allows people to burn extra calories without increasing their exercise amount. Crucially, this diet works better the more that you weigh. "We call it the Aw...

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Funny story: Kirstie Alley Still Losing Weight But Suffering Horrible Side-Effects

Kirstie Alley Still Losing Weight But Suffering Horrible Side-Effects

Although she has now lost over 40 pounds, actress Kirstie Alley says that the new pills that are really taking off her weight has some serious side-effects, she is determined to stay on them until she gets down to an even 200. Also Alley refuses to come out of her house until she is down to 200, but she has given her friends permission to talk with us. "Sally has lost a lot of weight alright...

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Funny story: Heartbreak for Raven-Symone: Drastic Weight Loss Doesn't Cure The Gay.

Heartbreak for Raven-Symone: Drastic Weight Loss Doesn't Cure The Gay.

If there's one thing Raven-Symoné never lacked, it's self-confidence, a rabid desire for hot girl-on-girl action, allegedly, and an LDL of 168. "I Thought I Looked Fabulous, No One Else Did." What a f--king pity. She didn't lose weight because she...

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Funny story: John Travolta drops 50 pounds on the Victoria Beckham diet after giving birth to son

John Travolta drops 50 pounds on the Victoria Beckham diet after giving birth to son

Scientologist John Travolta the first male-celeb to become pregnant and give birth has undergone a dramatic change in appearance. Just days after giving birth to his third child, the 1970s Vinnie Barbarino heart-throb appears to have rid himself of...

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Funny story: Former Fat Man Sues

Former Fat Man Sues

Ronald Rolls, car salesman and former fat man, has sued the weightloss group "WeightBreakers" after they helped him shed a staggering 40stone. Mr Rolls began life at a healthy 9lbs but ballooned to over 52stone by the time he was forty. Doctors g...

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Funny story: Weight-Loss Boffins Screw Up

Weight-Loss Boffins Screw Up

Research which sought to prove that drinking water before a meal helped with weight loss has been discredited. Researchers at Thames Valley East University published their results last week. They initially proved that people who drank a half pint...

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Funny story: Fatty tissue in the brain linked to reduced cognitive ability in weight loss researchers

Fatty tissue in the brain linked to reduced cognitive ability in weight loss researchers

The spare tires many U.S. adults carry around their middles have been linked to a buildup of fatty tissue in the brains of the weight loss researchers studying them, contributing to decreased cognitive ability. A group of thin researchers discove...

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Funny story: Weightlookers say dog sh*t helps you lose weight fast

Weightlookers say dog sh*t helps you lose weight fast

There was shock across the country as Weightlookers announced its' brand new "Doggy doo so you should too". The idea is very simple, some dogs eat their own turds and a fat dog is rarer than a fat human, therefore eating a soggy brown sausage should...

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Funny story: Woman Sheds 42 Pounds Doing Shopping Cart Cha-Cha

Woman Sheds 42 Pounds Doing Shopping Cart Cha-Cha

A new exercise craze is sweeping America by storm. It's not Pilates, it's not aerobics, and it's not tai chi or any number of other workout routines already heard of. This one is based on getting up on your feet, driving the mini-van to the nearest s...

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Funny story: Kirstie Alley Loses 50 Pounds In One Week on Obama's Darfur Diet

Kirstie Alley Loses 50 Pounds In One Week on Obama's Darfur Diet

World known weight yo-yo Kirstie Alley embraced the opportunity to Dance with the Stars by shedding fifty pounds in one week! The champion of the new diet is none other than Michelle Obama who is using her respected political status in order to a...

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Funny story: How Chocolate Can Become a Lifesaver!

How Chocolate Can Become a Lifesaver!

The average chunk of chocolate contains about 200 calories and because I might partake of two servings every night and is perhaps a few more at weekends it only adds up to 3,500 calories a week. That is the equivalent of one pound in weight per week. Therefore, in the last 3 1/2 years, I have had the calorific intake of about a hundred and eighty pounds and because I only weigh about one hundre...

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Funny story: Miracle of Weight Loss Revealed

Miracle of Weight Loss Revealed

(Alma, GA) Stating that the idea came to him after reading a Rant & Rave in the Ochlocknee Gazette, Dr. Walker Thronton, from nearby Lenox, claims he has discovered the long-sought secret to weight loss. "One of the ranters in the newspaper...

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