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Funny story: Vatican's In Utero Baptism Initiative "Perfect Way to Get 'em While They're Young"

Vatican's In Utero Baptism Initiative "Perfect Way to Get 'em While They're Young"

THE VATICAN - Though Pope Francis' turn at the papal office is still in its infancy, he has already become widely regarded as the most progressive in the Vatican's long history. But while doubters criticize many of his recent viewpoints as being "un-...

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Funny story: Pope Francis Tells North Korea's Kim Jong Un To Stop Behaving Like A Spoiled Brat

Pope Francis Tells North Korea's Kim Jong Un To Stop Behaving Like A Spoiled Brat

THE VATICAN - Pope Francis recently met with the co-hosts of The Viagra View, Larry King and Regis Philbin at an undisclosesd place in Italy. The pope was asked by Philbin what he thinks about the state of the world. Pope Francis put down his g...

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Funny story: Saints ain't what they used to be

Saints ain't what they used to be

Fast track Saints, now issued in batches of 30 or more are not as effective as the old single issue ones, an exit poll at St. Peter's Basilica has revealed. St. Christopher, now discredited for not being insured, was an all time favourite, polling 67...

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Funny story: After Death Of Mandela: Pope To 'Crank up the bass.'

After Death Of Mandela: Pope To 'Crank up the bass.'

'After paying tribute to Nelson Mandela, Pope Francis says it's time to, "crank up the bass and blow up a stereo."' A Vatican spokesperson. 'After Mandela's passing, I felt compelled to celebrate his life. So I instantly thought about subwoofe...

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Funny story: Higgs Boson is Wrong God particle says Vatican

Higgs Boson is Wrong God particle says Vatican

175 metres beneath the Franco-Swiss border near Geneva, Switzerland a thousand scientists are seeking the key to the universe. Last year an announcement was made that it had been found in a waste paper basket near the Atlas complex at the LHCA. B...

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Funny story: Pope-A-Dope Part 1: Pope Francis Deals It Up From The Bottom Of His Own Private What The Heck

Pope-A-Dope Part 1: Pope Francis Deals It Up From The Bottom Of His Own Private What The Heck

VATICAN CITY - Pope Francis unleashed his how you like me now mission statement for his (so far anyway) perpetually perplexing papacy Tuesday. During which he attempted to explain - via a variety of highly suspicious words otherwise recklessly distr...

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Funny story: Catholic Church to be Privatised

Catholic Church to be Privatised

The Catholic Church is to be floated on the Stock Market. Cardinal Karl Profiteri of the Holy See's Banca Ambrosiana has announced that the Church is going to be privatised. At a special conclave of bishops the vote was taken last April during th...

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Funny story: Freemasons To Sponsor Next World Cup

Freemasons To Sponsor Next World Cup

As the "Irish Freemasons' Young Musician of the Year" competition gets under way at the Masonic Hall, Molesworth Street, Dublin with a staggering 10K Euros on offer in prizes, a surprise decision has been announced by 359 Degree Mason Hektor Rameses...

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Funny story: Vatican buys Boy Scouts of America! Walmart buys NBC, CBS, & ABC News!

Vatican buys Boy Scouts of America! Walmart buys NBC, CBS, & ABC News!

Citizens of the US were shocked and dismayed this morning when news of the sale of the country's three major TV networks were reported sold to a corporate giant. As rumours flew in the media industry of TV anchor replacements and format changes, m...

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Funny story: The Vatican Asks The New Orleans Saints To Change Their Name

The Vatican Asks The New Orleans Saints To Change Their Name

BOSTON - Word coming out of the Vatican is that the Catholic Church has requested that the NFL New Orleans Saints change their name. Vatican Spokesperson Polo Pizarro, 83, said that due to the recent cheating scandals involving several players as...

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Funny story: Pope's remarks panic Purgatory

Pope's remarks panic Purgatory

Vatican City -- An offer by Pope Francis to reduce Purgatory time for Catholics who embrace the "miracle of social media" has led to a massive and sudden selloff of real estate in Purgatory. As a result, prices for Purgatory condos have been slas...

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Funny story: 'Pope's cassock was bugged' says Edward Snowden as Vatican offers asylum

'Pope's cassock was bugged' says Edward Snowden as Vatican offers asylum

Rome - Revelations Chapter 666, page 9/11 about covert buggery of Paypal [sic] vestments have triggered an offer of Holy Sanctuary to the US fugitive from justice who could be fast-tracked to sainthood if he accepts the Vatican citizenship offer.

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Funny story: Vatican Bank on verge of collapse as big heads roll in night of long knives

Vatican Bank on verge of collapse as big heads roll in night of long knives

Rome - Top knobs running the Vatican Bank fell on their tarnished swords this morning amid aftershocks in the latest money laundering scandal to grip the Holy C. Bank director Renzo Dolcelatte and his deputy Massimo Gorgonzola have fled the Bank's...

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Funny story: Another 'God's Banker' busted in Vatican money laundering racket

Another 'God's Banker' busted in Vatican money laundering racket

Rome - A Vatican Airways cargo plane loaded with €20m of illicit cash stuffed into North Face-Off zip-up holdalls was readying to take off from Switzerland's Gnomes of Zurich Airport when police swooped late last night. The seizure, part of an ong...

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Funny story: Pope blames rough trade in the Vatican

Pope blames rough trade in the Vatican

Rome - His Holiness has blamed a lurid Catacombs sex club called St Sebastian's Passageway for an outbreak of homosexuality in the Vatican. "At its core is a gay lobby," Pope Frankie the Argie said today, "swathed in peach-colored ruched silk drap...

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Funny story: Vatican Official Claims to Have Exorcised 160K Demons: Demons File Class Action Suit

Vatican Official Claims to Have Exorcised 160K Demons: Demons File Class Action Suit

Fr. Gabriel Amorth, The Head of International Association of Exorcists which is a Vatican sanctioned organization has recently made the claim that he has rid the world of 160,000 demons and sent them back to Hell. Fr. Amorth was one of the exorcists...

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Funny story: Pope Francis - Pesto worse than paedophilia

Pope Francis - Pesto worse than paedophilia

Chaos reigned on Vatican City last night after The Pope used a televised interview in which he was supposed to be confronting the Catholic Church sex abuse scandal to passionately condemn pesto. When asked how he intended to rebuild The Church an...

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