"Personally I think it's great, but then again, I'm completely made of wood." - This was the typical response that climate change experts experienced when lobbying a random cross-section of trees during last months investigation into the possibiliti...
A Conservative parliamentary candidate faces deselection over an affair she had with a tree more than four years ago. South West Norfolk Conservative Association members are angry Elizabeth Truss did not let them know about the affair. Party lead...
PAYSON, AZ - Dr. Harold B. Phallistra of the Payson Institute For Advanced Studies (PIFAS), claimed today in a small press conference held in the lobby of the Institute, that a recent spate of tree deaths in the area has led to an oxygen shortage in...
The remains of missing UK hippy tree hugger Lesley Mandleson has been found today in the Amazon rainforest where he was attempting fend to off illegal logging by tying himself to trees. Rescue worker Fidel Ramerez said, "Ok, this guy (26, beard) w...
Researchers have revealed that oak trees live for four times as long in the county of Kent, than they do in Scotland. The average lifespan of a Kentish Oak - barring hurricanes - is 1,000 years, whereas in Scotland the figures reveal an average li...
The Forestry Commission has recently added the fictional Ugly tree to its list of endangered species. The Ugly Tree, which has given rise to a number of catch phrases, as well as a number of Politicians, David Mellor, and Eastender Dean Gaffney ha...
Conservative MP Chris Fraser is to quit to care for a tree in his garden, after the Daily Telegraph said he had claimed £180K to buy more than 200 wives on the internet. Like every single MP that is standing down after the expenses scandals, he sa...
PORTLAND, Oregon - Reports coming out of northern Oregon state that several employees with the Ashburn and Greta Dalrymple Lumberjack Company have come down with a case that local doctors are calling Pine Flu. Slayter Hiddenlake supervisor with th...
Local New York officials apparently misinterpreting a threat warning from two Midwestern state governments,had beefed up police security around Manhattan but more specifically, Central Park. Police were instructed to be on the "look out" for susp...
The Evergreen Tree that took the life of Congressman Sonny Bono, who first stepped into the spotlight as half of the singing duo Sonny and Cher, has died after ten years of people nailing messages to Sonny on it. It was 47. The evergreen tree was 47,...
In a stunning abberation of nature, leaf-bearing trees worldwide have stopped shedding their leaves in the winter. "Shove it up your xylem and phloem," one markedly aggravated tree, Mr. Maple Hardwood, exclaimed. "We're deciduous trees. We simpl...
Material sent out by candidates and officials in September's Council polls was enough to fill up two Parks and one forest with trees, according to a concern group study. Dog owners Acting for People and the Environment said 551 tonnes of paper we...
BASIL - A new exhibit of dried leaves and acorns at Basil's museum puts 170 acorns, dried leaves and other works on display in Switzerland for the first time in six days. "Return of the leaves" is the largest acorn and dried leaf exhibit the museu...
A festering neighbourhood argument over the giant redwoods surrounding Cilla Black's mansion turned ugly earlier this week, with several trees given the chop while the Scouse TV star' was on holiday at Butlin's Lanzarote. Police were called to Bla...
A 300-year-old oak tree in Surrey has been made a 'Listed Building' by Council chiefs, who say that the tree, known as The Oak, is not responsible for local subsidence.
There was great excitement in Scotland yesterday, when money was discovered growing on a tree. Tree experts have said this is the first reported case of the phenomenon in Britain.
Bill Gates has unveiled a new computer that will actually allow scientist to talk to trees.
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