Satan was as ever resplendent and in buoyant mood as he made his way to his throne at London's Coventry Masonic Hall. J.K. Rowling who had used the hall for her Harry Potter film post-premier celebrations was in attendance to introduce him. Satan...
Jerusalem, Israel - A team of Oxford Theologists have confirmed what many believers have suspected for the last twenty years--that the most annoying of all gardening equipment was first thought up by the devil himself. "We stumbled across a very d...
While the last best hope of stopping Donald Trump's run for the White House was defined as "Lucifer in the flesh," by former House Majority leader John Boehner, Mr. Boehner added, (as though calling him 'Lucifer in the flesh' wasn't bad enough) "He'...
Auntie Sandra Levi, High Priestess of The Church of Satan, filed a lawsuit this week alleging that rock band Led Zeppelin plagiarized the copyrighted liturgy of her church. "When they recorded the subliminal Satanic lyrics in Stairway to Heaven, t...
Bentleyville, USA (AP)- Al Roker never predicted a rapturous burst of the power of prayer in his weekend forecast. The Child Soldiers For Christ youth group had assembled at their regular "divine debriefing" Sunday morning service when a loud nois...
A janitor at the famous Caesar's Palace Las Vegas claimed he not only saw Frank Sinatra the famous singer in a dressing room he was cleaning but had a long conversation with his ghost. A reporter from Follywood Fortnightly, LA's most prestigious variety magazine was invited to meet with the janitor. The janitor took the reporter to Frank's old dressing room and shouted; "Frank!" Out of an...
Reverend Gerry Fallguy, minister at the Suffering Jesus Christ Baptist church in Atlanta and founder of the Moral Immaturity movement, called reporters to his church last week to announce a startling discovery: "I took my kids to see the "Minions"...
Ex-Pope Ratzinger is recuperating well after an emergency exorcism was performed on him. Eight exorcists, three of them Cardinals from Africa, Germany and Ireland spent seven weeks, seven hours and seven minutes casting out demons from the ex-Pontif...
A member of the charity organisation CAGE by the name of Asim Qureshi has come to the defence of Satan and described him as a "beautiful and polite human being who we would be lucky to call a friend". The statement was issued by Mr Qureshi, shor...
Last night, Satan's New Year Address 2015, held as usual in rooms beneath the House of Commons England was hugely attended. Present were all the Grand Masters of the leading Masonic Lodges worldwide, Pope Francis, the Royal Family of England, leading...
Comedienne Joan Rivers may have died last week following complications from plastic surgery, but that doesn't mean she's slowed down or lost her edge. The eighty-one year-old comic, known for her bitchy attitude, is still makin' 'em laugh in the afte...
Satan Conference in Hollywood. On this occasion, The Prince of Darkness used actor Christopher Walken as his channel. After a little dance routine, to the immense amusement of the packed audience, Mr. Walken took up position on his golden throne centre-stage looking resplendent in a tux, and fingering a gold-topped malacca. He mopped his sweating forehead with a red, silk hankie before beginnin...
Olaf Soxoff, a German-Swiss skier has alerted the world to an incredible find. An experienced veteran of the piste, the sixty-three years old Olaf decided to try an unfamiliar route on the South side of Switzerland's highest mountain, the Matterhorn.
In a weird survey conducted by Harvard's Neuroscience Department some interesting findings are being discussed. College and University students were asked to list in descending order WHO THEY WOULD LEAST WANT TO BE AS THEY BREATHED THEIR LAST. The most recurring choices were... 1. Henry Kissinger. 2. Barack Obama 3. George Bush Senior. 4. George Bush Junior. 5. Donald Rumsfeld. 6. Tony Bla...
An elderly couple recently told how they were terrorised in their own home for three days by a cat! Royston Munt needed hospital treatment after being attacked by the intruder, which got in through a bedroom window. Retired taxidermist and WW2...
Los Angeles, CA The Westboro Baptist Church, known to be haters of homosexuality to the point of desecrating U.S. veteran's funerals, were caught in a plot by police today. In the line forming outside the Ellen DeGeneres Show, dozens of members of...
This special Bilderberg Conference was held in Madrid at the request of Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy. Officiating as usual was Satan. Compere was Jimmy Savile. Musical interlude was supplied by the late Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Elvis and Sammy Davis. Drinks were served by Obama Bin Laden. Seated regally on his golden throne wearing his black silk cloak, feet on desk and fingering his mala...
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