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Funny story: US super majors shun Brazilian auction

US super majors shun Brazilian auction

Sao Paulo - A $7 billion [15 billion real] upfront 'signature bonus' demanded by Sao Paulo auctioneers has been slammed by US energy companies as a crude scam amid rumors of a Hugo Chavez-style nationalization of Brazilian oil and gas next year. B...

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Funny story: Goldmine Sacks Holds Record Amounts of Pipeline in Storage

Goldmine Sacks Holds Record Amounts of Pipeline in Storage

Just revealed, the Wall Street banking firm Goldmine Sacks has rented up new warehouse storage in the range of trillions of square feet. The purpose is to hold miles of pipeline in abeyance and readiness, depending on need for implementation in upcom...

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Funny story: Barrel making companies looking to diversify

Barrel making companies looking to diversify

With the world oil crisis seeing peak oil having being passed, less and less barrels of oil are being extracted from the ground. "This has hit our business hard," said David Cooper, of Cooper's Polyurethane Barrels in Nantwich. "We have seen a dr...

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Funny story: The World's Largest Swamp Discovered In New Mexico

The World's Largest Swamp Discovered In New Mexico

TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES, New Mexico - A team of oil surveyors who were looking for a possible site for a pipe line which would bring oil from Mexico into the United States recently made an amazing discovery. The chief surveyor identified as Packwood...

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Funny story: Iran Announces: Here Comes The Grandmother of All Oil Spills

Iran Announces: Here Comes The Grandmother of All Oil Spills

TEHRAN, Iran - A highly personal in-house memorandum between Iran's Ayatollah Abdul Musaweewee Abacus, 67, to Ayatollah Ali Mohammad Open-Sesame, Jr., 71, has been intercepted by CIA operatives and forwarded to President Obama via FedEx. The extre...

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Funny story: Irish eyes are smiling again; no not at their soccer team, it's those Oil billions!

Irish eyes are smiling again; no not at their soccer team, it's those Oil billions!

A bonanza is about to hit the Emerald Isles that will be as huge as the Yukon Gold Rush and the Euro invasion put together(?). Oil, billions of barrels of the stuff is about to be pumped from Barryroe Oilfield into Europe via Great Britain making...

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Funny story: "Frack you America!" states oil and gas industry

"Frack you America!" states oil and gas industry

The American Petroleum Institute issued a statement this morning announcing the intent of its members to, "Frack you America!" While the statement seemed bold and aggressive, the API went on to state it had the backing of one hundred percent of i...

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Funny story: London 'Must Pay To Clean Up Scots Oil Rigs'

London 'Must Pay To Clean Up Scots Oil Rigs'

An unseemly diplomatic row is festering between the Scottish Parliament and Whitehall following comments by the SNP energy minister concerning decommissioned oil rigs. Fergus Ewing told the Commons Energy Committee that Westminster should pick up...

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Funny story: President Obama Admits He Wants Gas Prices To Hit $8.00 A Gallon!

President Obama Admits He Wants Gas Prices To Hit $8.00 A Gallon!

President Obama finally came out and told the truth about ending oil lines from Canada, preventing drilling for more oil in the Gulf of Mexico and every other place that he can. "Above all, I'm an environmentalist", he told reporters today. "Look...

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Funny story: Women Protest on Oil Price Increase In Line with International Women's Day

Women Protest on Oil Price Increase In Line with International Women's Day

JAKARTA, INDONESIA (CWTS World News) -- In line with the International Women's Day, women protest the increase of prices of cooking oil that also affected other countries worldwide. "Our concern on this issue is that women carry these kinds of bur...

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Funny story: Price of Cooking Oil Increases This Week

Price of Cooking Oil Increases This Week

Prices of various brands of cooking oil were expected to increase starting this week. The companies Kiba Shale and Princess Resurrection Chap'rone increased their cooking gas by $1.50 per liter and cooking diesel by $0.75 per liter. According t...

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Funny story: Windsor Castle oil spill 'part of Chevron Ecuador pollution scam'

Windsor Castle oil spill 'part of Chevron Ecuador pollution scam'

Windsor, Berks - An oil leak close to a newly installed River Thames hydro power turbine near Windsor Castle has been blamed by Amazonbotch supporters on US super major Chevron. Thousands of gallons of sweet light crude have been reported gushing...

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Funny story: Leaked Government Documents Reveal Secret Falkland's Plan

Leaked Government Documents Reveal Secret Falkland's Plan

The British government has drawn up secret plans to tow the Falkland Islands nearer to the British mainland. According to the leaked documents, the secret operation, named 'Disaster Waiting To Happen', will supposedly take place when the Argentin...

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Funny story: The Big Freeze, or How I Learned to Love Big Oil

The Big Freeze, or How I Learned to Love Big Oil

This January of 2051 marks the 30th anniversary of the start of the "Big Freeze" which began in the winter of 2020-21. We know now, and have known for more than two decades, that it was the misguided campaign of "Big Green" in the late 20th century and early this century which led to this near-catastrophe for the world. Only this week, The International Panel for Carbon Combustion (IPCC) publis...

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Funny story: Iran joins forces with Cuba to add sugar to oil exports

Iran joins forces with Cuba to add sugar to oil exports

Havana, Cuba - Machines of all description will be ruined when oil mixed with raw sugarcane juice is exported from Iran in the coming days. Raul Casablancabenot, press-underling in the Castro administration, was boasting to reporters in a bar ne...

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Funny story: EPA to Penalize Failure to Use "Carbon-Free Unicorn Gas"

EPA to Penalize Failure to Use "Carbon-Free Unicorn Gas"

SAN FRANCISCO - Corporations which fail to use EPA mandated "Carbon-Free Unicorn Gas" may face almost $7 Million in fines as warnings from the Federal Government were issued with the arrival of a new year. Objections are loud and numerous over a requ...

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Funny story: Iran trying to ratchet up the price of crude with Straits of Hormuz blockade plan

Iran trying to ratchet up the price of crude with Straits of Hormuz blockade plan

Arabian Gulf - "You can blame the psychotic Supreme Leader of Iran, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, for this latest sabre rattling scare," a source at the CIA's desk in Pyongyang commented this morning. "Expect the price of oil to rocket at around $150 a...

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