Dewsbury, West Yorks - (Appalling Mess): "Is it because I'm fat, dumb and can't simper in front of the Pope like a rich, educated blonde?"...
Praia da Iluzion, Portugal - (Rotters): Gerry and Kate McCann have been asked to return to the Vatican to take part in a large-scale re-enactment of their meeting with the Pope last year.
Rothley, Liecs - (Ass Mess): Kate and Gerry McCann are flying to Brussels on Wednesday to lobby the UK EU Commissioner Peter Mandelson after somehow leaving him out of their celeb A-List last summer.
Kate and Gerry McCann, who didn't do it, received substantial payments in the form of damages today after the Star and Express both admitted their coverage of the case of the McCann's missing daughter (they can't have done it, it stands t...
Cyberspace - (Ass Mess): A number of satirical websites have issued an apology to Gerry McCann after claims he was trolling chatrooms under the assumed name of Helium.
Praia Da Iluzion - (Ass Mess): Portuguese police have retalliated at today's Sunday Tosser campaign of finding new unofficial suspects by issuing their own e-fit sketches of the main arguidos.
London - (Bad Ass Mess): Fundamentalist religious cover-up cult Opus Dei is under investigation following reports it is financing a new trial by tabloid campaign in the McCann case.
Since Madeleine McCann's disappearance on 3rd May last year, the world and its dog's eyes have been gripped by the unfolding of this sorry drama. Four of those eyes are those of Max Clifford, and his dog Molly, a 4 year old Dalmatian.
The News of the World has been criticised for its slowness and ineptitude in solving the case of Madeleine McCann, who has now been missing for 256 days. The newspaper, which has been officially investigating the case since its beginnings, has recen...
Following the successful completion of the rebranding of the McCanns in Portugal, it has today been revealed that the Team McCann brand has also been overhauled in Spanish territories too.
News emerged today that award winning Lisbon based design agency E-Nova have been retained by the Find Madeleine fund to undertake a ground up rebranding exercise of key elements of Team McCann in order to increase their appeal in the Portuguese mark...
Praia Da Iluzion - (Sad Ass Mess): This year's must-see smash-hit blockbuster movie is set to be the remake of the 1965 spaghetti western For A Few Arguidos More.
Gerry McCann went back to work as a cardiologist at Glenfield Hospital in Leicester, England this week. Looking sexy ater his boob job, he said that he and his wife Kate had done as much as they could in the search f...
Portugese police investigating the disappearance of Madeleine McCann are refocusing their attention on original suspect, dubious expat Brit loner, Robert Murat, 33.
Madeleine McCann's parents used a fund established to help search for the missing girl to pay for plastic surgery and breast enhancement, a family spokesman said on Tuesday.
Portimao, Algarve: (Conspiracy Mess): With the summer holiday season now well and truly over, unemployed seasonal workers in the Praia da Luz district of the Algarve have hit on an ingenious Xmas bonus scheme in the current wake of the lets-get-the-...
A sketched picture of a man believed to look a bit like the person who may have abducted Madeleine McCann, if indeed, she has been abducted, has been hastily cobbled together in a joint venture by one of Mr and Mrs McCann's drunken friends, and an F...
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