MI5, Britains top-secret spy organisation, have let it be known that they will be monitoring all email and mobile phone traffic. The job of monitoring has been handed to Capita, who usually get these sort of multi-million pound Government contracts.
Balimmoral, Scotland - "At any rate I'll never go there again!" said Alice as she picked her way through the wood after attending the Mad Hatter's Tea Party. "It's the stupidest tea-party I ever was at in all my life!" Little did Alice know that the...
London, England - The world premiere of the new James Bond film in London's Leicester Square was marred by revelations that human remains have been discovered on the film's set. Quantum of Solace stars Daniel Craig and Judi Dench were strutting th...
The British intelligence service MI5 is pushing to recruit more flaming queers to the organisation. After all, say spokesmen for MI5, " Everyone knows 007 was a famous woopsie, all those sexy straight women around him - that's the hallmark of you...
In a classic case of penis envy, US and UK spies, spooks and psychologists were deeply involved in the re-circumcision of Mohammed BinYAHHHH! The Ethiopian national has been awarded the Guinness Book of Records Award for being tortured by more co...
London - (God's Wanker Mess): A toxic whoremonger is the prime suspect behind an Alexander Litvinenko-syle radioactive cookery masterclass after the UK top spook Alex Allan was rushed to hospital.
London - (Rioters): MI5 spooks have branded Lord Levy's posturings a load of sanitised whoppers after reviewing his security files detailing a 30 year career as one of the UK's top terror mobsters.
In an attempt to show that Asians are fitting into British society and that not all Moslems are bomb-carrying, head-chopping deviants, the Government has given the green light to the broadcast of public interviews of...
Sensational news emerging tonight that seventies Brummy soap opera, Crossroads, was in fact a recruiting ground for the UK's top spying bods, MFI.
Special officers investigating the National trust have today discovered a massive stockpiled supply of weapons hidden within stately homes.
An attempt to plant a bomb in the houses of parliament was foiled by the security service (MI5) at the week end as five terrorists attempted to enter the building from the roof. The five terror suspects abseiled down the south clock face of the Westm...
The government has been rocked by a sensational spy scandal, with former MI5, MI6 and Rotherham United goalkeeper Marilyn 29 being named as the 'mole' at the centre.
The controversial knighting of author Salman Rushdie in the Queen's Birthday Honours List has been revealed as a plot by MI5 to end the drain on public funds of protecting him.
The Conservative leader David Cameron lead calls for a public inquiry into the hip hop rappers investigation, following on from yesterday's outrage at terror rappe...
A Muslim taxi driver has sparked a security alert in London after acquiring The Knowledge, and then leaving the country.
In conjunction with the release of e-mail and mobile alerts to the general public, MI5 have also today released details of the renaming of the levels of security threat.
London - (AssoCIAted Mess): Police investigating the suspicious poisoning of a former KGB officer Alexander Litvinenko are reported to be bugging cash-strapped Russian oligarch and Chelsea football club owner Roman Abramovich after claims that 's...
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