Showing:

Funny satire stories about Lottery

Try another search?

Funny story: Tight Scottish couple win Euromillions and promise not to spend a penny!

Tight Scottish couple win Euromillions and promise not to spend a penny!

A very tight Scottish couple have won 161 million GBP on the Euromillions lottery and have promised not to alter their lifestyle. They are devoted scrooges and winning the millions will not change a thing. Scottish people are renowned for their ti...

Read full story
Funny story: Grossly obese Scots couple scoop £161m Eurosquillions rollover

Grossly obese Scots couple scoop £161m Eurosquillions rollover

Glasgow - A pair of middle-aged chinless blobs from Lard - er...Largs! - in Ayrshire won the record breaking jackpot after a seven week-long rollover. Chris and Colin Weird (sic) said today they would be investing some of the dosh in gastric band...

Read full story
Funny story: 60's Pop Combo The Applejacks To Form Lottery Syndicate

60's Pop Combo The Applejacks To Form Lottery Syndicate

The 1960's pop combo from Solihull in the West Midlands, the Applejacks, who had a monster 60's hit with 'Tell Me When' have announced that they are to form a National Lottery Syndicate. Initially, it is thought that the syndicate will only involv...

Read full story
Funny story: National Lottery Plans Announced

National Lottery Plans Announced

Reinhold Reince Priebus, Chairman of the Republican National Committee, recently revealed that plans are being formulated to conduct a National Republican Lottery sometime in August. It will be conducted similar to the Selective Training and Serv...

Read full story
Funny story: Farty Arse Comes Up Trumps!

Farty Arse Comes Up Trumps!

Accrington man, Farty Arse, who changed his name by deed poll from Julius Woodbine in 1997 has come up trumps on the National Lottery after netting a cool five hundred pounds on a scratch card. Mr Arse - unemployed since 1979 - excitedly revealed...

Read full story
Funny story: 'Anonymous' £113m EuroMillions jackpot winner 'rumored to be Kate's father Michael Middleton'

'Anonymous' £113m EuroMillions jackpot winner 'rumored to be Kate's father Michael Middleton'

London - Secrecy shrouds the identity of last October's staggering EuroMillions jackpot ticket-holder who plumped for anonimity when trousering the dosh. But the rumor was all the rage inside Buckingham Palace's gilded walls this afternoon as gues...

Read full story
Funny story: Richard Desmond Announces Health Lottery: "Survival rates are down to luck and where you live"

Richard Desmond Announces Health Lottery: "Survival rates are down to luck and where you live"

Media tycoon Richard Desmond has unveiled a new lottery game which aims to raise awareness of the disparity of healthcare across the UK. Everyone will pay into the lottery from their normal tax contributions, and the fund will be used to pay for a...

Read full story
Funny story: Unknown woman to host UK Lottery

Unknown woman to host UK Lottery

The BBC, in which every UK household has a £150 share in order to ensure the director general Mark "bound to soon be a sir or maybe even a lord" Thompson has a huge salary and gives the public wonderful repeats, has decided that, with the impending r...

Read full story
Funny story: UKIP reveal their plans for reducing the national debt

UKIP reveal their plans for reducing the national debt

A leaked memo from UKIP, the United Kingdom Independence Party, has revealed how the minority party intends to reduce the British deficit. The party, which ironical has several European MPs despite it's purported aim of taking Britain out of Europ...

Read full story
Funny story: Euromillions winners to remain anonymous

Euromillions winners to remain anonymous

The winners of the £113 million Euromillions prize have finally come forward to claim their money. The winners are believed to be a syndicate of four men, who do not wish their identities to be revealed in case people insist they buy them presents.

Read full story
Funny story: Queen in shock as cops smash Palace's £113 million lotto winner kidnap plot

Queen in shock as cops smash Palace's £113 million lotto winner kidnap plot

London - (Stand & Deliver News): She's said to be gobsmacked after Royal Protection Racket cops foiled a Palace abduction attempt on the mystery Eurosquillions winner. Months of secret phishing expeditions using an adapted Stuxnet virus had se...

Read full story
Funny story: Jordan - Alex "£40.40 Euromillions" Reid revenge

Jordan - Alex "£40.40 Euromillions" Reid revenge

Following last weeks revelations that Alex Reid, minnion husband of big titted Jordan, had won the Euromillions jackpot and dumped his "fishlips" missus, she has bounced back to give the actual story on how crossdresser husband "Roxanne" had "fucked...

Read full story
Funny story: Alex "Euromillions" Reid dumps Jordan

Alex "Euromillions" Reid dumps Jordan

Alex Reid has sensationally dumped Jordan, real name Katie Price, after he revealed he has won the Euromillions lottery. Alex Reid issued a statement today thanking his adoring fans for all their support but said that wife Jordan can "Go and do...

Read full story
Funny story: Tory fatcat 'is secret £113 million lotto winner'

Tory fatcat 'is secret £113 million lotto winner'

London - (Big Money Balls Mess): A prominent government front bencher has been outed as the secret winner of last week's £113 million lottery draw. The anonymous MP - previously an all-party House of Commons adviser on the lottery - is said to be...

Read full story
Funny story: Did Former Pirate from Manchester Win $175M Lottery? Mum's The Word Says His Barrister!

Did Former Pirate from Manchester Win $175M Lottery? Mum's The Word Says His Barrister!

Despite universal silence on the matter, rumours are circulating that a former Pirate, butcher, and shite cook has scored the nation's biggest lotto payoff since Wayne Rooney & David Beckham made off with everything but the crown jewels in their...

Read full story
Funny story: Shock: Devonshire Man Wins Lottery

Shock: Devonshire Man Wins Lottery

A Devonshire man has told us of the moment he won the National Lottery. Dennis Rubbery, 67, was knocked spang out of his slippers when the news came that he was a winner. "I couldn't ruddy believe it," he beamed, "it's changed my life, really i...

Read full story
Funny story: Paul The Octopus Predicts Saturday's National Lottery Numbers

Paul The Octopus Predicts Saturday's National Lottery Numbers

The octopus that has successfully predicted the outcomes of several World Cup football matches, has been at BBC Broadcasting House this afternoon to screen a special programme during which he forecasts what the winning numbers will be in Saturday's N...

Read full story

Breaking news…
Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more