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Funny satire stories about Donald Rumsfeld

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Funny story: Department of Veterans Affairs Secretary James Nicholson praises Donald Rumsfeld

Department of Veterans Affairs Secretary James Nicholson praises Donald Rumsfeld

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Secretary of the Department of Veterans Affairs James Nicholson recently held a joint press conference with Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld. The two expressed great satisfaction with the ongoing war and the policy to resume m...

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Funny story: Donald Rumsfeld to be Shot out of a Cannon

Donald Rumsfeld to be Shot out of a Cannon

D.C. -- In a daring show of support and solidarity for our troops Donald Rumsfeld agreed to get SHOT out of a cannon over the edge of a U.S. Naval aircraft carrier into the middle of the Red Sea next week. Surprisingly many members of Congress...

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Funny story: $3.7 Trillion in Girl Scout Cookies Unaccounted For - Mr. T. Sent to Administer Justice

$3.7 Trillion in Girl Scout Cookies Unaccounted For - Mr. T. Sent to Administer Justice

A shocked nation awoke today to the news of over three and a half trillion dollars in Girl Scout cookies have just up and vanished - completely unaccounted for. "We don't know where they went" parroted a well-groomed Donald Rumsfeld, wiping what app...

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Funny story: Donald Rumsfeld announces Iraqi Troop Pullout

Donald Rumsfeld announces Iraqi Troop Pullout

(MSNBC) Donald Rumsfeld in a surprise announcement told Meet The Press's Tim Russert that our troops in Iraq are coming home in December. 2038. Russert, a bit startled by the announcement asked Rumsfeld, "Why so long?" to which Rumsfel...

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Funny story: A Coloured Outlook

A Coloured Outlook

George W. Bush visited the devastation that once was New Orleans, accompanied by Condoleeza Rice, Donald Rumsfeld, an army of aides and security personnel, plus representatives of the Press. It was necessary to reinstate confidence, after appointing a KKK Grand Wizard as head of clean-up operations, and the nation wondering why nothing was happening to help this hurricane ravaged area of the Deep...

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Funny story: Rumsfeld Creates Secret Legislature To Replace US Congress

Rumsfeld Creates Secret Legislature To Replace US Congress

Buoyed by the successful creation of a secret Defense Department intelligence agency, DoD Secretary Donald Rumsfeld has created a secret legislature as well. Just as the secret Defense intelligence organization supercedes the CIA, the new so-calle...

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Funny story: Iraqi Insurgency Could Last 1200 years, Rumsfeld Warns

Iraqi Insurgency Could Last 1200 years, Rumsfeld Warns

WASHINGTON, DC--The Iraqi insurgency could stretch on for more than a 1000 years, U.S. Defence Secretary Donald Rumsfeld said as he played down recent meetings between American officials and resistance leaders.

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Funny story: Has Rumsfeld Gone Mad?

Has Rumsfeld Gone Mad?

WASHINGTON. May 16. Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld on Friday announced a sweeping plan for the closure of up to 180 military bases throughout the U.S. The purpose of the closures is to ‘create a leaner, more cost-effective force.' Mr...

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Funny story: Italians Outraged over Rumsfeld's EZ Pass Remark

Italians Outraged over Rumsfeld's EZ Pass Remark

WASHINGTON - Perhaps Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld was not the right person to telephone Italian Premier Silvio Berlusconi to convey this country's condolences for the killing of Italian intelligence officer Nicola Calipari and the wounding of...

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Funny story: Porter Goss and Donald Rumsfeld: The War Is Going Well, If You Don't Mind Losing.

Porter Goss and Donald Rumsfeld: The War Is Going Well, If You Don't Mind Losing.

United States Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld and CIA Director Porter Goss both appeared in front of various Congressional Committees yesterday to warn America that Administration policies over the last four years have made the chances that the...

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Funny story: Rumsfeld Calls Tsunami Survivors "Selfish"

Rumsfeld Calls Tsunami Survivors "Selfish"

U.S. Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld has derided critics of United States tsunami relief efforts as "selfish whiners who don't have their priorities straight."...

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Funny story: Donald Rumsfeld Admits to Emoticon Addiction

Donald Rumsfeld Admits to Emoticon Addiction

Washington - U.S. Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld has been put on "administrative leave" after admitting to an addiction to emoticons earlier in the week.

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Funny story: US returns power to Saddam

US returns power to Saddam

In an unprecedented peace move US Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld (left) today handed power to the former Iraqi President Saddam Hussein (right).

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Funny story: Donald Rumsfeld Fired! Embarks on New Career as Rap Mogul

Donald Rumsfeld Fired! Embarks on New Career as Rap Mogul

"Donald Rumsfeld is out of a job!"...

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Funny story: Rumsfeld Spotted in a Very Strange Position in His Office

Rumsfeld Spotted in a Very Strange Position in His Office

June 2004: Secretary of spirited Dee-fense, Donald Rumsfeld, was found yesterday afternoon in his office with his ***head up his ass.*** When confronted, he pulled it out, replying, "I was looking for some answers to throw to the Senate Intell...

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Funny story: Donald Rumsfeld in Sex Shocker!

Donald Rumsfeld in Sex Shocker!

The Pentagon press corps was embarrassed by Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld's "coming out" announcement this morning at the 9 A. M. briefing. Mr. Rumsfeld, normally conservative in appearance and manner, seemed uncharacteristically at ease as he...

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Funny story: Rummy's damage control gift pack

Rummy's damage control gift pack

With some critics calling for him to be stripped naked and led out of the Pentagon on a dog leash, Donald Rumsfeld stepped up the campaign to save his skin by announcing a lavish compensation package (including Halliburton stock options and McDonalds...

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