Passions are high at the meteorological office, more heat is being engendered than the cold snap in February. 'It is so exciting' said Met Chief Isobar Therm 'and it is going to get better. We will be headline news all next week.' However homel...
What has hitherto been a closely guarded secret among a tight circle of friends became public knowledge on Friday night when it was revealed that TV personality Jonathon Ross finds liquid nitrogen 'really horny' a 'bit scary' and 'tantalisingly irres...
BALTIMORE - Like a dinosaur bone preserved in the side of a mountain or an insect befallen in tree sap, a recent snowstorm to the Baltimore metropolitan area has been perfectly preserving animal droppings city wide. Area man Mike James has two dogs,...
Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, was delighted last night when wife Anne turned up at his workplace in the family E-Baymobile to give him a lift home after a gruelling twelve hour shift, a gesture which negated the horrible necessity of waiting around...
Panic ensued in the car park of a local pub tonight here in the heart of suburban Surrey as a Miss Wet Tee Shirt contest went tragically wrong - or, to use the local vernacular 'tits up.' A bevy of local beauties - English Roses one and all - line...
A Chinese diplomat at the United Nations stated Friday that Beijing was now under five feet of snow after they seeded the clouds two weeks ago so they could experience it for the first time, and he blames the West! "For many years we were on our o...
US President Barack Obama has declared the common cold a national emergency. The President signed the Taking Ourselves 2 Seriously proclamation at a jousting tournament in Washington DC last Friday, wearing a crown and surrounded by knights and serva...
A Dudley man has today been diagnosed with a cold. He was reported to be sneezing, coughing, and felt a bit sweaty and tired. He claims that he caught the cold from a friend of his, who had recently returned from holiday in Mexico. It is thought t...
An exceptionally cold winter always brings more instances of the annual tragedy of young boys who could not resist the age-old experiment to see what would happen if, in sub-zero temperatures, they tried to lick a metal pole. In fact, it happened...
Dateline: Milwaukee, Wisconsin. - Unprepared for impact by a circling low pressure storm previously centered over Alaska, the Northern United States will encounter record low temperatures as the Arctic blast passes over Minnesota, Wisconsin and Michi...
It is 6am and it is so cold I think many of my figures are going to drop off very soon. But where am I? A Bush outside Daniel Radcliffe's Fulham home of course.
With the monumental success of the Lord Of The Rings trilogy, the movie studios (God bless their cold black hearts) have tried to come up with the next big fantasy epic for the big screen, because as we all know, an inferior rip-off is the sincerest form of flattery.
It's a cold day at the U.N. delegation and people are expected to be involved in heavy arguments. Prince Charles starts the processions with an inspirational speech.
(Washington) - Presidential front runner, Hillary Clinton, today announced that, if she is elected, she will reveal the cure for the common cold.
Science International Knowledge Symposium, London - (Ass Mess): First blue-eyed Arians were lauded as more intelligent than their brown-eyed counter-parts.
Rock Springs - Scientist, Fred Hurns, head of the Science Department at Washington State, had planned a three month tour of the country to help spread proof that the planet is suffering global warming. His tour was cut short, however, after freezing...
A group of Swedish boffins from Sweden in Holland claim to have perfected the cure to the common cold and if it's substantiated then the sky's the limit in money terms, with pharmaceutical giants from around the world sure to be beating a pat...
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