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Funny satire stories about Rob Pattinson

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson In Black Eye Mystery

Robert Pattinson In Black Eye Mystery

Your local news reporting team decided that further investigation was warranted when I spotted pics of Twilight star Robert Pattinson sporting what appeared to be a black eye, and horror of all horrors for teens everywhere, sporting a beard! I imm...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson In Row With Sam Uley On Set Of Twilight

Robert Pattinson In Row With Sam Uley On Set Of Twilight

No one has been talking about it to the press but a row on the set of Twilight resulted in one group pulling for Robert Pattinson and another for Sam Uley, one of the werewolves! The row was in the exercise room. One day Robinson would have the re...

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Funny story: Twilight is Shit

Twilight is Shit

it's the movie everyone is talking about (provided you are a stupid teenage girl and like being overcharged at the cinema) but the film Twilight - New Moon is a heap of shit. Crap graphics, rubbish acting and not enough Robert Pattinson (off sunni...

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Funny story: Twilight Stars Robert Pattinson And Kristen Stewart Stand United Against Malicious Rumours

Twilight Stars Robert Pattinson And Kristen Stewart Stand United Against Malicious Rumours

Twilight stars Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart faced the press today in the State Function Room of the Dunbonkin Hotel on New York City's fashionable Fifth Avenue in order to quell a constant stream of outrageous innuendo and ill informed specul...

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Funny story: Researchers Create World's Smallest Image of Rob Pattinson!

Researchers Create World's Smallest Image of Rob Pattinson!

PALO ALTO, CA (SFO) - When university researchers set out to create the world's smallest image of Rob Pattinson, they ended up setting a record for the smallest image ever, said an assistant professor of physics for the university who directed the wo...

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Funny story: Twilight Star Robert Pattinson Acts Fast To Dispel Malicious Rumours

Twilight Star Robert Pattinson Acts Fast To Dispel Malicious Rumours

"I have never expressed a desire to marry Susan Boyle, or Kristen Stewart, or anybody else for that matter," Brit actor and star of the 'Twilight' movies, Robert Pattinson today told a packed Press Corps in New York City's Hotel Abstinence. On Lexing...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle Accuses Twilight Of Stealing Her Thunder

Susan Boyle Accuses Twilight Of Stealing Her Thunder

Former Scottish Church volunteer, turned into worldwide phenomenon after her performance on a British reality show, Susan Boyle was all set for her big album release and in New York City when she was told to hold down the racket because some of the s...

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Funny story: New Moon On The Rise, Breaks Harry Potter, Slingblade Record!

New Moon On The Rise, Breaks Harry Potter, Slingblade Record!

The long awaited vampire romance movie "The Twilight Saga: New Moon" raked in $26.3 million at North American box offices in midnight showings, breaking the record set by "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince," which had broken the "Slingblade" re...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Visit The World Famous La Brea Tar Pits

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Visit The World Famous La Brea Tar Pits

LA BREA, California - One of the most identifiable couple on the planet, Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson took some time off from their busy schedule and promotion for their new motion picture The Twilight Saga: New Moon. The popular couple ha...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson has female repoductive organs?

Robert Pattinson has female repoductive organs?

In an exclusive interview with the Twilight star Robert Pattinson, he has revealed that he infact has female genitalia. He said "I want to use my biological givens to make any other male in my position feel more comfortable in his body, we should'd b...

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Funny story: Kristen Stewart's Bad Sex Memory At Thanksgiving

Kristen Stewart's Bad Sex Memory At Thanksgiving

While several of us were allowed recently to talk with some of the cast of Twilight: New Moon, the group somehow got onto Thanksgiving, being this time of year, and some great memories they had. Probably, the other reason was because everyone was...

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Funny story: Rob Pattinson And Kristen Stewart's Twilight Movie Not All It's Cracked Up To Be

Rob Pattinson And Kristen Stewart's Twilight Movie Not All It's Cracked Up To Be

Following all the hype. Spoof writer Skoob1999 was left to his own devices, drinking beer, as usual, and generally being silly and feeding the cats. As his much beloved wife went to bed. Leaving Skoob to watch a movie. The movie he opted...

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Funny story: Rob Pattinson And Kristen Stewart's 'Twilight' Premier On Sky TV Causes Havoc In UK Household.

Rob Pattinson And Kristen Stewart's 'Twilight' Premier On Sky TV Causes Havoc In UK Household.

The television premiere of cult vampire movie, Twilight, on Sky Movies Premier this evening caused chaos in one UK household. Spoof correspondent Skoob1999 wanted to watch the movie so that he could gain a further degree of understanding of the Ro...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson May Not Be Able To Reproduce

Robert Pattinson May Not Be Able To Reproduce

Actor Robert Pattinson may not be able to produce any progeny, unless he bites them on the throat of course, as a source states that he may have a low sperm count. When interviewed by this reporter, an unnamed doctor's office help said that it was...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson turns Gangsta!

Robert Pattinson turns Gangsta!

23 year old Robert Pattinson announced that he was turning 'Gangsta' on October 29, 2009. He decided that he didn't like people knowing him as 'The vampire from 'Twilight''. He says, "I want to have my own image. Something people will remembe...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson Considering The Bat Man Role

Robert Pattinson Considering The Bat Man Role

A new movie proposal is being considered by Robert Pattinson, in the title role of The Bat Man! No, it isn't Batman, but The Bat Man. According to the writers, this will be an adventure comedy role here the Bat Man who DOES fight crime, but is act...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson Confesses To Kristen

Robert Pattinson Confesses To Kristen

Apparently Robert Pattinson had something in his past that he really didn't want Kristen Stewart to know but she knew instinctively that there has always been something that he has been holding back. So, this past weekend he told her, and it didn...

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