The Young people of today who just don't care about the world around them and are generally ignorant and dismissive of politics and life in general now have a voice. Life is getting increasingly harder for the younger generation of today yet The C...
Washington, D.C - How do you cap off a Democratic Presidency that seems to have gotten almost nothing done for nearly eight long years? Well, a good way to start is to gather all the whack job liberals you can find after a really gruesome, racially m...
Athens -- One of the world's most beloved pieces of comedy is about to be irreparably changed, the result of Greece's monetary woes. The proper response to the classic riddle -- What's a Greek urn? -- Is no longer "about €35 an hour." The punch...
Washington DC: The FBI has stated that it will begin to track sales of all premium home blender purchases, but the public will not be inconvinced in any way. Special Agent Martin Hanes stated that, "We're openly letting the public know this for the p...
Once again, Americans are treated to a display of obscene self-promotion of egomaniacal proportion only fusing the personalities of P.T. Barnum, Madonna, Kim Kardashian, Kim Jong Un, and Idi Amin Dada could match. "The Donald;" oh you remember him -...
Washington, DC - 2016 Presidential candidate, Senator Rand Paul, is well known in Washington circles for being able to talk the hind legs off of a donkey, as demonstrated in his ten and a half hour filibuster on the Senate floor this March to protest...
Obama now says that he was misquoted by the media during the last election campaign and that his words were taken out of context. Obama claims that what all of this shows is the harmful effect on journalism that the cuts and downsizing at large Ameri...
Tokyo - The largest recall in automotive history has left auto-parts fabricator Takata holding the bag… Or more specifically holding 34 million defective airbags. Problem is, the devices have a tendency to go off like bombs, whenever the weath...
"I don't know how it happened," Madge Filber, Sheldon Andelson's private secretary said. She scratched her right ear lobe where a pearl earring hung on a 4 inch chain. "I was sipping hot water with lemon, in a large coffee cup, when Mr. Andelson a...
In a shock announcement this morning God announced his resignation over the outcome of the UK General Election in which David Cameron was reelected with an overall majority. An angel appeared in our offices this morning with the announcement, whe...
There's an atmosphere in Downing Street that no one can deny, Outside the sound of "Tories out!" The public now does cry … The cabinet are speechless, and the PM seems quite glum, He turns now to George Osborne (who used to be his chum) "Well now George, what can we do?" "To regain all lost pride?" The secretary for defense advised that they should "Hide", George now opened up his mouth and...
New York, NY - In a rare political move not seen since the early '70's, Rosie Perez released a message via Twitter and Instagram, that her and her colleagues are collectively running a bi-partisan bid for the 2016 White House. "That is, if we don'...
Washington, DC -- The Federal Election Commission is distributing a campaign necessity kit to candidates for President of the United States. The multifaceted toolbox is being provided in lieu of cash. The FEC has the task of distributing federal f...
Stockholm Sweden: A 16 year old with ambiguous genitalia has been allowed to undergo a "double sex change" operation. According to the doctors the parents couldn't be more proud of their child. They see "he and she" (soon to be she and he) as a t...
John Kerry has issued a (somewhat) heartfelt and (entirely) disinterested plea for Europe to stay in the EU. But for some reason his customary shine, polish and wide-eyed eloquence of a typical well-beloved fairly centre-leaning Secretary of State has temporarily deserted him. For some inexplicable reason, the notable public figure in question is straying into the kind of long-winded verbo...
Every one's favourite cognac-admiring Eurocrat, Jean-Claude Juncker, has made some surprising revelations to a famously objective UK media outlet. You know what, I actually can't stand the EU and Europe! The renowned deconstructor of achingly right-wing/left wing stereotypes and mutual antagonisms cantankerously continues: I mean, seriously! This is the one continent in the world where...
Kissing babies, stroking hedgehogs, now the Election Candidates are ready to take part in Sunday Night Dramas and Reality TV, to up their ratings. We understand that Nigel Farage will appear in a crowd scene in 'Poldark', as an angered 'winnower',...
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