A group of pigeon drug couriers has been caught "pigeon-footed" delivering drugs to Colombian prisons. Regular flights from the Colombian coca fields to the prison were no problem for the pigeons, they're all "Homeys". The only problem was that t...
Eddie Furlong, who has a role in the new Green Hornet movie, has been arrested for getting too close to his ex-wife and violating a court ordered restraining order. After several complaints from Furlong's former wife, Rachael Kneeland, the police...
Ben Africa, an ex-secret operative with the Black Opps Group, Al Sarmir, had noticed that this winter, where he lived, a slight movement in his house would generate a charge of static electricity in him, and that any contact with a metal object would...
Epiphany Police will be on the streets of the UK tonight ensuring that householders remove all Christmas decorations. "In previous years," said Chief of the Epiphany Police, John Baptiste, "we have had occasions where people have failed to remove...
Scotland Yard are on the hunt for a woman who is removing testicles from unsuspecting men, and selling them on the internet. The thief, now identified as Lady Godiva, the onetime bum snatching bandit, has gone to ground, somewhere in Canada. Po...
Greater Manchester police chief, Superintendent Rudy Dancer, has a stark warning for motorists. "We're currently in the flu season," Prancer said at a press conference this morning. "During this period of the year we see an increase in the number...
Philadelphia police are worried that a Mexican gang working out of Sinaloa, Mexico has hired the Son of the Zodiac killer as a guardian angel for their drug retail operations in Philly. The police in Philadelphia received a letter from the Son...
In the words of the late and much lamented Joe Strummer, of The Clash: London's burning. Violence flared around Parliament Square as students protesting against increases in tuition fees were met by police officers, who elected to respond by hitti...
After a five year study into UK murders Greater Manchester police have come to the conclusion that people who commit murder are irrational. "We have monitored the murders over the past five years," said detective inspector Jim Taggart. "What this...
A major scandal has emerged because of the disappearance at our local Police Station. A Snowman 'acting in a suspicious manner ' was arrested by vigilant police and taken to the nearest police station. When questioned the Snowman refused to reply...
Nasty thieves in Kent, UK, have stolen a snowman from under the nose of it's owner as she was sweeping the snow in her front garden the thieves jumped over the garden fence and whipped the snowman, with a carrot as his nose, away. The irate woman...
Police have urged people throughout the entire of freezing Britain to stay indoors amid warnings of heavy snow and plunging temperatures. Meteorologists have warned of meteor sized snow falls that would crush a person flat, should they be unlucky...
Constable Paul Stephenson, recently demoted from his his position a the Met Police Chief, had concluded a pact with a fake student leader so that demonstrations against student fees would not get out of hand. If was revealed today by Wikileaks, de...
Sir Paul Stephenson has come out with a prediction that a 'new era of civil unrest' is in the pipeline for Britain. This comes in the aftermath of the Kettle boiling in Whitehall and 16 campus buildings being occupied by students. Sir Paul anticip...
Psychic Metropolitan Police Commissioner Sir Paul Stephenson has said he expects more student disorder on our streets but is refusing to give the exact location of where they will occur. He says this is to ensure 'terror tourists' with no interest...
In an attempt to further the education of students the Police have put into force their latest plan to make more students more radical. By putting the students in a kettle and lighting the flame below it the young people get hot feet and begin to...
Police are conducting a city wide search for a group of youths who callously left a pal hanging in a busy street, last Thursday evening, while out on the town drinking. Reports suggest the group were out celebrating a work related job promotion, f...
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