To everyone's surprise, Michael Vick being ruled out as playing on Sunday against the 49ers doesn't mean that there will be no one available that can actually gain yards: Running back LeSean McCoy, who was expected to miss time with a broken rib, is...
Flaming stupid-ass Glen Coffee, the 23-year-old former 49er running back who retired suddenly this offseason, was arrested in Florida for carrying a concealed firearm. "The pistol was recovered with the hammer 'cocked'," said the Folt Walton, Flor...
DATELINE- NEW YORK CITY, NY, U.S.A.--- It was, said Coach Tom Coughlin, "just a case of the N.Y. Football Giants letting the foot-ball team from Tennessees run through them." Tossing the foot-ball, and plenty of it, came from the New York Footbal...
The New York Jets signed Inés Sainz of the Mexican television network TV Azteca to be a 3rd down possession receiver, clearing up the misunderstanding this week when Dennis Thurman, the team's defensive backs coach, purposely overthrew passes to land...
A meeting of National Football League owners in Atlanta brought up something that they were all in agreement to do: Go to an 18 game football season. Although it cannot be done until a major contract negotiations with the players union next year,...
Certain sport news agencies, including the one that allows LeBron James to write his own news stories, is reporting that the NFL will be using footballs with microchips inside, in order to prevent blown calls by officials. The microchips will hel...
LANDOVER, MA - Redskins defensive end Albert Haynesworth reported to training camp out of shape on Thursday, in protest of what he calls Arizona's "really racist law thingy". Haynesworth, who was unable to complete a series of shuttle runs, has taken...
Philadelphia Eagles owner Jeffrey Lurie finally called head coach Andy Reid to task for selecting QB Kevin Kolb to start over ASPCA F--khead Of The Decade Michael Vick, characterizing it as an issue of "Using a hammer when you own a nail-gun." "Wi...
Sticks and Stones Will Break my Bones, but Misdemeanor Assault Victims Will Sue Me. - Be true to your school! Former Texas Longhorn and current Tenessee Titans gunslinger Vince Young allegedly got P.O. 'ed at a Dallas titty bar when a fellow lap danc...
"Unless they want to find themselves the subject of a huge lawsuit, they better knock off using the word 'football' for their wussy game and this includes 'futbol', as well." This statement was attributed to Knute Redknuckle, the football commission...
Claiming he always loves to travel and welcomes a challenge, NFL Legend Quarterback Brett Favre announced he is leaving the NFL in order to join the SGA (Scottish Gridiron Association) dedicated to advance American football in Scotland! Reports co...
Following numerous news reports of fighting during National Football League playoff parties, the Food and Drug Association has determined that the source of most man-on-man violence originated over individual hoarding of potato chip dip. Not yet r...
Breaking news appears to suggest that talks are at an advanced stage between NFL officials and a London consortium with a view to awarding London an NFL franchise. Our insider told us that should this scenario become a reality, the London team wil...
NFL all-stars, quarterback Peyton Manning of the Indianapolis Colts and defensive linebacker Ray Lewis of the Baltimore Ravens will meet this Saturday in a playoff showdown in Indianapolis. In a sharp turn of events, Peyton Manning said, "If Ray Lewi...
Plans announced by the NFL (National Football League) to expand to 40 teams by 2020 have former President George "Dubya" Bush excited. Bush, who used to be part owner and the managing partner of the Texas Rangers baseball team has expressed a desire...
The National Football League has announced plans to expand to 40 teams by the beginning of the 2020 season. In a 40 team league, they would continue to have two conferences with four divisions each (increasing to five teams per division). When as...
Cincinnati Bengals wide-receiver Chad Ochocinco (whose last name used to be Johnson) has stated he will change is name again to Chad NumeroUno despite what NFL commission Roger Goodell has to say about it. "He can't stop me," Ochocinco said. "He c...
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