10 Downing Street, London - (AssoCIAted Mess): A silky-smooth and highly polished Metropolitan Police counter-intelligence operation is in full swing as UK security/intelligence agencies home in on the latest parvenu that Cherry Bush QC has tried to...
London - (Associated Mess): A full complement of the House of Mountbatten is expected to attend this week's memorial service at St Adolf's-up-the-Creek parish church for the suicided Opus Dei banker Gianmario Roveraro who chainsawed himself...
London - (AssoCIAted Mess): Tessa Jowl's beleagured dodgy husband David 'Dark Satanic' Mills was sweating plutonium today following the news that Italian police have discovered the body of Opus Dei banker Gianmario Roveraro who disappear...
London - (AssoCIAted Mess): Following yesterday's sudden shock resignation of the Archbishop of Westminster's right-hand PR guru Oz-Tin Ivory, UK cops have confirmed that they are now probing his boss Cormac Murphy O'Connor who is believ...
London - (AssoCIAted Mess): "Yes, we're like brothers", said Tony Blair as he defended Michael Levy - his No 1 WMD fantasist, personal bagman and co-author of the biggest conspiracy to pervert the course of justice since General Pinoch...
London - (AssoCIAted Mess): The Prime Monster's Middle East envoy, top fun raiser and official bagman Michael Levy is in a North London slammer today after the Serious and Organised Fraud Squad of the Metropolitan Police busted him in their inve...
London - (AssoCIAted Mess): Pressure was mounting last night on Tessa Jowl's shyster lawyer husband David 'Dark Satanic' Mills in the God's Banker murder probe as he and fourteen accomplices were indicted on fraud, embezzlement and c...
New Scotland Yard, London - (AssoCIAted Mess): UK cops have confirmed that the new video footage released by Al Jazeera TV of the 7/7 London bombing top suspect is of the Prince William doppleganger spawned by a lethal conjunction between Chancellor...
London - (Associated Mess): A Ministry of Defence spokesman confirmed this morning that known relatives of Adolf Hitler and Joseph Stalin who have made stellar careers from impersonating members of the British royal family will be representing the U...
London - (Associated Mess): Next week sees the eagerly awaited London High Court criminal trial of US banking and oil heir apparent Matthew Mellon, famous for his maternal great-grandma Katherine Drexel becoming a Roman Catholic saint in 2000 after...
London - (Associated Mess): The UK civil aviation industry has announced that it is going to club together and buy Prime Monster Tony Blair his very own aircraft. The news comes after Cherie Blair's accountant advised there were buckets of cash...
London - (Associated Mess): The Archbishop of Canterbury Dr Rowan Williams preached before a capacity audience at St Paul's Cathedral today to commemorate the 80th birthday of Elizabeth Windsor and extolled her inhumanity at steadfastly refusing...
London - (Associated Mess): The finger of suspicion in the criminal investigation of the 7 July London bombings has been pointing long and hard in the direction of disgraced ex-Home Secretary David Blunkett, according to documents released by MI5 un...
London - (Associated Mess): The consultant at the heart of an eight year quackery investigation about the MMR triple vaccine's link to congenital stupidity is to face gross professional misconduct charges after UK cops found he had been bankroll...
London - (ReUterus & Associated Mess): Official state documents dating from John Major's administration in 1996 have been released today showing that the Pretender to the UK Throne Charles Windsor was warned as far back as 1980 that bigamy might...
London - (Associated Mess): Jewellery and other memorabilia belonging to the late Princess Margaret is being auctioned off in London next week in the hope that it will raise enough money for her heirs to pay off the Metropolitan Police's Specia...
London - (Associated Mess): Bob Geldof is rumoured to be crisis talks today to stage a new Live8 benefit gig in London's Hype Park to alleviate the suffering of the six million drought-stricken Londoners facing imminent water rationing.
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