The long believed theory that all footballers are born with congenital brain defects has been disproved by the British Medical Council after thousands of extensive tests lasting over thirty seven years. Some are actually quite normal when born, a...
In surveys asking women "Chocolate or SEX?" almost 90% of women chose ......Chocolate! Now in a new US poll more than 50% of the surveyed said they would rather be thin than have sex. Body experts say that in our modern-day culture the inter-tw...
A purportedly esteemed cardiologist, Dr Darrel Francis, has this week earned the nickname of Silly Sillypersonson by proposing that fast food restaurants around the country should offer drugs to diners to compensate for the risk of heart disease.
OTTAWA, CANADA: In what is being hailed as a medical marvel a famous former Canadian prime minister is recovering from successful full-brain transplant surgery. This is the first time in the world that such surgery has not only been attempted but...
In an effort to protect the U.S. public from low cost, healthy foods, the US Food and Drug Administration will now ban fresh broccoli from human consumption. "This ban is being implemented after multiple reports of the benefits of fresh broccoli a...
Doctors in Sweden have certified for general medical use a Proporol-based diet program that guarantees humongous weight losses. The only catches are: You have to like ice cream and red velvet cake with thick marshmallow frosting; and you must be...
The British Medical Association has finally admitted that drinking alcohol is, after all, beneficial to health. As millions of drinkers raise a glass to toast the good news it emerged that the painful condition of rheumatoid arthritis can be help...
Just minutes after doctors at Sloane-Kettering announced that it had discovered a cure for Spermatorrhea, a swarm of angry sufferers of the disease broke into Kettering's labs, destroying the treatment. Spermatorrhea, whose cause is believed to be...
The Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA) had announced that it will publish research into Postorgasmic Illness Syndrome, including, they say, a cure. First described by doctors in 2002, Postorgasmic Illness Syndrome (POIS) is a condi...
Scientists say they have come up with a vaginal gel that will prevent aids and even pregnancy 100%. "If people will use this gel, it is a big breakthrough", Doctor Alicia Huckaby. "It works in all our tests but it does have a few drawbacks." Fi...
A revised code of conduct issued by the new industry regulator, will effectively mean that Pharmacy staff will be able to choose which drugs they dispense and which they do not, in accordance with their own beliefs. The General Pharmaceutical Coun...
Studies by the World Health Organization consortium known as the "Gastro-Intestinal Researchers, Therapists and Hospitals", have indicated that the typical social networking tool addict, has a 97% chance of being or becoming a grotesquely fat bastard...
NHS Chief Execuive Harvey Crippin, has unvieled plans to ditch modern day expensive medicines for more traditional remedies. Speaking outside Charing Cross Hospital Mortuary, he stated; "We will not be spending billions on chemical drugs any longer,...
"Pretty (Hefty) Woman" Julia Roberts has put on some 50 pounds while doing her latest film, "Eat, Pray, Love!" "The role calls for me to go on a year-long food binge and I can never spit anything out because it makes me sick", stated the big old g...
The spare tires many U.S. adults carry around their middles have been linked to a buildup of fatty tissue in the brains of the weight loss researchers studying them, contributing to decreased cognitive ability. A group of thin researchers discove...
Doctors at the Psychedelic Post-Premonition Research Center in Mill Valley, California have discovered that the some toes are loaded with previously unidentified microscopic nerve cells. The cells are called Samantha Micro Toe Cellules after the lab...
For anyone who has been homeless for more than a day, mayonnaise is a real Godsend. It can be acquired at almost all fast food restaurants for free and it provides just enough calories to sustain one's energy level for a few more miserable hours, or until they can scrounge up something else to eat from a dumpster. Mayonnaise as we all know is most commonly used as a sandwich spread but duri...
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