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Funny satire stories about Terrorism

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Funny story: Officials Discover Al Qaeda Operating Rogue Aviation Network: Low Fares but Horrible Safety Record

Officials Discover Al Qaeda Operating Rogue Aviation Network: Low Fares but Horrible Safety Record

TIMBUKTU, Mali - In early 2008, an official at the U.S. Department of Homeland Security sent a report to his superiors detailing the most significant development in aircraft usage since 2001: al Qaeda has been operating a rogue aviation network. Fran...

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Funny story: Senate Floor Cleared With Blast From Terrorist Alarm System

Senate Floor Cleared With Blast From Terrorist Alarm System

The Senate floor was cleared in a record 45 minutes yesterday when a siren sounded and someone shouted "Terrorist Raid" plus only two older Senators were injured after being once again trampled underfoot by a screaming, wild crowd. "I do wish they...

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Funny story: Joint U.S. / Israeli Task Force Concludes Over 80,000,000 Worldwide Are Terrorists

Joint U.S. / Israeli Task Force Concludes Over 80,000,000 Worldwide Are Terrorists

A joint U.S. / Israeli Task Force has completed its investigative report and now concludes that over 80,000,000 people worldwide are in fact terrorists. The categorization includes those who are blood related to a terrorist, those who have smirked or...

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Funny story: CIA Announcement Confirms There Are 71 Virgins in Heaven, Plus One That Could Go Either Way After Jockey Short Bomber Completes Sex Change!

CIA Announcement Confirms There Are 71 Virgins in Heaven, Plus One That Could Go Either Way After Jockey Short Bomber Completes Sex Change!

Speaking off the record, a highly placed CIA operative confirmed that recently apprehended 'Jockey Short Bomber' Umar Farouk Aldulmutalation, has by his own request, completed his sex change operation courtesy of the US government and Medicare. Um...

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Funny story: President Obama Vows To Outlaw Crotch Bombers and Groin Bombers

President Obama Vows To Outlaw Crotch Bombers and Groin Bombers

BOISE, Idaho - President Barack Obama was in Boise to attend the dedication of the town's 80-foot tall Mr. Potato Head statue. After the festive festivities he was asked what he plans on doing about these nasty Al Qaeda and Taliban operatives who...

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Funny story: Al Queda Airline Bomber Pleads 'Not Guilty' in Detroit

Al Queda Airline Bomber Pleads 'Not Guilty' in Detroit

Clearly with a massive amount of evidence to support a claim of innocence for the serious charges against him, Nigerian passenger, Abdulmutallab plead 'Not Guity" to all charges in federal court this afternoon. Advised by his assigned pool lawyer...

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Funny story: Top Retailer to Offer Terrorist Accessories

Top Retailer to Offer Terrorist Accessories

Recognizing shifting U.S. demographics a top US retailer's 2010 product line will include useful accessories specifically designed to appeal to the terrorist segment. "This is an important customer group for us," said spokesperson Shabaella Fou.

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Funny story: Senior tries to blow up pharmacy with bomb in depends

Senior tries to blow up pharmacy with bomb in depends

An angry senior citizen upset over her pharmacies refusal to accept Medicare-B Rx plan for her medications, tried to blow herself up in front of the pharmacy counter at her local Walgroin's store. "I would have been successful too if I hadn't wet...

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Funny story: POTUS Demands Nigerian Bomber Must Receive New Penis Before Prosecution!

POTUS Demands Nigerian Bomber Must Receive New Penis Before Prosecution!

President Hussein Obama, Jr., reacted strongly against calls to prosecute the 'Nigerian Bomber' until he 'got his Johnson Back', according to Press Secretary Robert Gibbs, himself no stranger to being called a 'dick less C**** by critics. Umar Far...

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Funny story: Crotch bomber may be help to motorcyle industry in China

Crotch bomber may be help to motorcyle industry in China

The worlds largest import of motorbikes are interested in contacting the "crotch bomber" to try to incorporate his "underwear" bomb into their new motorcycle aptly dubbed "crotch rocket". The new bike just being mass produced in China is at prese...

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Funny story: Crotch Bomber to Use "Nuh-uh!" Defense

Crotch Bomber to Use "Nuh-uh!" Defense

The court-appointed attorney for crotch bomber Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab announced today that his legal defense at the upcoming criminal trial will be based on the "Nuh-uh!" theory. "What else can I do?," said Illinois Public Defender John Maynard...

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Funny story: Third Intruder to WH Dinner Identifed as Terror Watchlister

Third Intruder to WH Dinner Identifed as Terror Watchlister

In another example of just how secure US Security Agencies can make a secure White House function, it was revealed today that a third uninvited intruder managed to make his way past security and into the Double Secret Security Clearance Only, WH dinn...

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Funny story: Crotch Bomber May Lose Penis

Crotch Bomber May Lose Penis

The al-Qeada operative who tried to blow up an airliner over Detroit "may lose his sexual appendage," according to a reliable medical source treating Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab. The source says what is left of the 23-year-old Nigerian's penis wil...

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Funny story: State of emergency declared by City of Denver as bomb doesn't go off

State of emergency declared by City of Denver as bomb doesn't go off

There was widespread panic today in the city of Denver, Colorado, after a bomb nearly went off on a jet plane, but didn't. Thousands of its citizens were in a state of shock, many requiring medical treatment for what officials termed 'the worst case...

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Funny story: Sex, masturbation the only cure to turn young Muslim men away from terrorism

Sex, masturbation the only cure to turn young Muslim men away from terrorism

LONDON: It has been established that the Nigerian national who attempted to blow-up a Detroit-bound aircraft with his explosives-laden underwear was actually a 'sexually frustrated loner', unable to play out his normal sexual urges and who converted...

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Funny story: Nigerian Passenger Has Explosion in Pants

Nigerian Passenger Has Explosion in Pants

A 23-year-old Nigerian has been taken into custody after having an explosion take place in his pants as the plane he was on was approaching Detroit and being subdued by passengers and crew. Apparently this was the first time the passenger had bee...

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Funny story: New Years fireworks are banned in Pakistan, Iraq and Afghanistan, much too dangerous

New Years fireworks are banned in Pakistan, Iraq and Afghanistan, much too dangerous

Ahead of the New Year celebrations several countries have decided to ban fireworks and firework displays because they feel they are much too dangerous! In Baghdad there was a fireworks display planned but it has been banned because several childre...

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