LOS ANGELES - Well as if things weren't all ready bad enough for The Will Smith & Jada Pinkett-Smith & Marc Anthony Traveling Sideshow and Carnival now comes word from the big Tinsel Town castle in the sky that the Pinkett-Smith/Anthony TNT s...
Leominster is the latest sleepy provincial market town to be hit by a spate of John Wayne-induced happy slap attacks. The outbreak of about 60 incidents last night followed two earlier attacks by wives in Selby, North Yorkshire. They attacked thei...
Selby's married women have gone on a 'happy slapping' rampage today during TV screenings of John Wayne movies. As we reported earlier today, Mr Barry Glimpse was attacked by his wife and sister-in-law while watching Rio Bravo. It transpired th...
A Selby man was subject to a happy slap attack by his wife and sister-in-law today while watching the John Wayne western Rio Bravo. The incident appears to have been a copy cat version of a similar attack last month. Barry Glimpse, 47, of Ikea...
HOLLYWOOD - A show that has been getting a lot of publicity; too much perhaps is a new show called Prime Suspect. The police show stars Maria Bello as New York City Detective Jane Timoney. And from the looks of the dozens and dozens of network pro...
New York - Phillip Brewer, owner of the surprisingly popular Boring Television Network (BTN), has announced changes to the upcoming fall line up. Network executives have determined Sewing Machine Wars as too exciting for the network everyone reli...
Vets are warning that many people are bringing pet dogs along to their surgeries presenting a problem of fixed, staring eyes. They say the problem is being caused by Britain's change from analogue to digital television. They say the flicker rate...
Producers of teen soap opera Hollyoaks have admitted employing a lumberjack, during filming of the latest episodes of the flagging TV show. Actors have become so wooden in recent months that TV execs needed to thin out the cast a little. "The p...
After the latest viewing figures for Strictly Come Dancing show that this form of reality television remains as inexplicably popular as ever, the BBC intend to expand the stable. "For example, in late Autumn we're going to be showing Strictly No P...
It's taken twenty-five years to complete the study, but the latest research from Evesham Sports College indicates that for every hour spent watching TV, life expectancy is reduced by twenty-two minutes. "This means," said Teri Vizien, who headed u...
The popular quiz, hosted by Joe Pasquale - 'Is this your Sheep?' has been axed, due to falling ratings. The show, which in its hey-day was presented by Ant and Dec attracted fifteen million, due to its edge of the seat Sheep based guessing game, s...
ITV1 is suffering a disastrous summer as some of its new entertainment formats register appalling viewing figures. But entertainment vigilante group TV Repair Man sees the figures as justification for its stand against what it describes as moronic...
If there's one thing I can't stand, it's Jeremy Clarkson. Another thing I can't stand is the cat. Yes, the cat that sits on my window sill every evening and looks at me. I can feel its green eyes burning into my soul, while I'm heating the milk. Into my very soul, they burn, while the skin forms on the milk and it begins to rise dangerously high up the sides of the milk pan. Bastit, that was t...
Faced with declining ratings and stronger competition, the Late Show with David Letterman has traded away its popular "Top 10 List" feature to Jay Leno in exchange for Leno's "Jay Walking" segment. Neither Letterman or Leno would comment on switching their signature comedy concepts. But a Late Show producer revealed 10 reasons why the trade was made: 10. Our audiences will get a kick out of...
Sun-soaked forensic drama CSI:Miami returns to UK television for its ninth season this evening - and the critics will be watching closely. Horatio will arrive at his offices to find everyone stricken by a gas attack - and according to the preview...
(LSM) - Midway through season three, Obama is facing the possibility of cancellation if the show cannot increase its ratings. The administration has lost many viewers due to the current "Debt Ceiling" story-line, which has alienated the casual viewe...
Geordie comic Sarah Millican has caused uproar amongst telly addicts by failing to appear on television for over a week. The whereabouts of Miss Millican are unknown and police have begun a search to find her and get her back on our screens as soo...
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