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Funny satire stories about Drugs

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Funny story: £400 million royal Xmas coke deal busted

£400 million royal Xmas coke deal busted

Cork, Ireland - (Ass Mess): One and a half tonnes of cocaine worth an estimated £400 million and bound for the London Xmas party scene has been seized off the west coast of Ireland after a seven month surveillance operation tracking Prince Charles' l...

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Funny story: Couple Fed Winehouse Crack

Couple Fed Winehouse Crack

A sexually curious middle aged couple have admitted supplying drugs to the singer Amy Winehouse. The Drugs in question, called 'loopy juice', are a silly combination of crack cocaine, ecstacy and Um Bongo fruit based beverages. The couple, who...

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Funny story: Scientists Rediscover the Joys of Methanol

Scientists Rediscover the Joys of Methanol

LITTLE ROCKS, AK - Scientists in this town have discovered a "new" way to get high with everyday household items. I had to sign a non-disclosure agreement to get this story, but being basically a crook, I gleefully reveal the details herein. No, this is no candy and soda mixture that you make gushers of foaming mess up your nose with. I'm talking about heavily altered states of reality here.

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Funny story: White Lines Appalled By Negative Connotations

White Lines Appalled By Negative Connotations

A series of white road markings in Mudchute, London have spoken out against the negative image that cocaine has given them. The issue arose after police were called to a supposedly drug-addled mania which turned out to be a series of freshly painted...

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Funny story: Parents Use Dogs to Sniff Scent of Drugs on Teens

Parents Use Dogs to Sniff Scent of Drugs on Teens

Parents in Snifataway, New York, attempting a novel approach at detecting teen drug use, are encountering unexpected results. Employing dogs trained to sniff out contraband from international shipping containers, borrowed from the New York Port Au...

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Funny story: Cuba and Columbia Develop New Hybrid Cigar

Cuba and Columbia Develop New Hybrid Cigar

Two cash crops normally outlawed in the United States will be combined to produce a new hybrid cigar called the "Cuban Fatty". While the U.S. has outlawed certain agricultural product imports from the countries of Cuba and Columbia, Cuba has no...

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Funny story: Pharmaceuticals Company Announces New Male Pregnancy Test

Pharmaceuticals Company Announces New Male Pregnancy Test

In the hopes of doubling revenue, a pharmaceuticals company is now offering an at-home male pregnancy test. Typically, the test rarely detects actual pregnancy in males. However, it is amazingly accurate in detecting males whose partners (typical...

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Funny story: Crack Recycling Programme for London

Crack Recycling Programme for London

The Government have announced new measures to raise extra funding for the Metropolitan Police. The move has been endorsed by the Mayoral appointed New Chief Constable Lord Jeffery Archer. During the past year Crack Cocaine with a street value of a...

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Funny story: Global markets in turmoil following announcement of compulsory random drug tests for City traders

Global markets in turmoil following announcement of compulsory random drug tests for City traders

London - (Toxic Mess): "You takin' the piss?" That was the sombre comment from one Canary Wharf trader today following the announcement that compulsory drug testing of City traders forms part of the UK government's bail-out of the banking industry.

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Funny story: Britain's Pensioners Turn To Heroin

Britain's Pensioners Turn To Heroin

Britain's pensioners are turning to hard core drugs in droves to escape the gritty reality of their useless lives in today's society, a report has today revealed. Pensioners are hounding down dealers on sink estates asking for cut price heroin and...

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Funny story: George Michael addicted to crack in more ways than one

George Michael addicted to crack in more ways than one

Out of a toilet in a darkened night club in Los Angeles, George Michael was once again caught with his pants down & his nose in crack, smoking crack. He admitted to being in possession of a crack, but felt he should not be charged as he had...

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Funny story: New Drug legislation Pushed by Bush

New Drug legislation Pushed by Bush

Coming quickly after Geo. W. said he couldn't remember if he used cocaine sources close to the White House now report that Geo. W. Bush is pushing hard to pass new drug legislation before he leaves office. Our sources report The Oily One wants to...

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Funny story: Chavez Expels US Ambassador...Clears Way for More Drug Trafficking!

Chavez Expels US Ambassador...Clears Way for More Drug Trafficking!

Caracas,Vn/ Rolling Stone Magazine - Venezuela's Socialist President, Hugo Chavez cleared the way for his new economic Drug Trading Pact with Russia by expelling the US Ambassador, and terminating cooperation with US DEA agents. The action follows su...

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Funny story: Comedian Ron "Tater Salad" White Blue When Collared For Drug Possession

Comedian Ron "Tater Salad" White Blue When Collared For Drug Possession

Ron White, member of The Blue Collar Comedy Tour (with Jeff Foxworthy, Larry the Cable Guy, and Bill Engvall) was arrested in Florida for possession of drugs and drug paraphernalia. White, alias Tater Salad, is most famous for his routines "You Can'...

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Funny story: Govt. Employees Extend Oil Bartering to Include Sex, Drugs & Rock & Roll!

Govt. Employees Extend Oil Bartering to Include Sex, Drugs & Rock & Roll!

Denver,Colorado/ AP- Employees of the Mineral Management Office under the auspices of the Department of the Interior, were found to be swapping spit, drugs and exotic vacations in exchange for lucrative oil contracts. In a report released today, t...

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Funny story: Bush Interior Dept Internalize Drugs and Others' Sex Organs!

Bush Interior Dept Internalize Drugs and Others' Sex Organs!

The worst US administration ever just keeps adding to the disasters. Unsatisfied with a destroying Iraq, Afghanistan and New Orleans and leaving the country less secure than before 9-11, we now learn that the Bush Interior Dept has been up to their n...

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Funny story: Shrooms Ground Flyin' Air

Shrooms Ground Flyin' Air

Airlines have been brought down to earth by everything fro bad weather to mechanical malfunctions but a recent grounding of a Flyin' Air flight may have been a first for any airline in the world. Flying from Budapest to Dublin, the flight requi...

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