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Funny satire stories about Manchester United

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Funny story: Defiant City Keep The Pressure On United With 6-1 Massacre At Norwich

Defiant City Keep The Pressure On United With 6-1 Massacre At Norwich

Manchester City last night insisted that their title tilt is over, at least for this season. Manager, Roberto "Boom Boom" Mancini, former world champion boxer, composer, scarf wearer, and fashion model told the press. "Is finished," he said. Bu...

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Funny story: Animal rights to investigate 'Man City' throwing the Canaries to the Wolves

Animal rights to investigate 'Man City' throwing the Canaries to the Wolves

Animal rights have promised to investigate a report of animal cruelty in the Norfolk area, after rumours on twitter of canaries being savaged by a group of rich playboys known as 'Man City'. The group hail from Argentina, Italy, Holland and other...

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Funny story: Pundits Suggest That Wigan Defeat May Just Be Another Fergie Mind Game

Pundits Suggest That Wigan Defeat May Just Be Another Fergie Mind Game

Not everybody was surprised by Wigan Athletic's 1-0 victory over a rather lethargic Manchester United last night. Or by the good grace with which Sir Alex accepted the loss. "Manchester United were awful last night," said pundit, Mark Sleepyhead.

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Funny story: Manchester United Denied Penalty

Manchester United Denied Penalty

There was a shock at Old Trafford on Sunday as Manchester United were denied a penalty after Ashley Young's blatant dive. After the match, Sir Alex "Cheating Wanker" Ferguson was incensed, saying "I haven't seen the replay but that was a certain pena...

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Funny story: Alex Ferguson admits Manchester United's success is not down to him

Alex Ferguson admits Manchester United's success is not down to him

Manchester United manager, Alex Ferguson has admitted that he is not responsible for the success of Manchester United this year. "It's nothing to do with me," he said. Actually, he said "E now tude wimmy" but a translator offered the correct pronu...

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Funny story: Man City to raid Arsenal for a third time - this time for three points

Man City to raid Arsenal for a third time - this time for three points

Big spending Manchester City are set to raid the Emirates for a third time following the purchase of Samir Nasri and Gael Clichy last summer. This time the title challenging blue half of Manchester are not after a player, but three points in the a...

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Funny story: Balotellis Blood Brother

Balotellis Blood Brother

The football world's greatest car crash player "Super" Mario Balotelli has a new rival for his throne of "Pratt in chief of the Premier League". His best friend Luigi Falcone is in talks to sign for hated rivals Manchester United. Luigi 21 said:...

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Funny story: Samantha Brick To Be Guest Of Honour At The Etihad Next Wednesday

Samantha Brick To Be Guest Of Honour At The Etihad Next Wednesday

In his boldest psychological warfare tactic yet, Sir Alex Ferguson has announced through intermediaries that self promoting journalist, Samantha - I'm so beautiful it pains me - Brick, is to be 'Guest Of Honour' next Wednesday at The Etihad, when Man...

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Funny story: Mancini - "I've Bought Super Mario An Easter Egg - That Oughta Sort It!"

Mancini - "I've Bought Super Mario An Easter Egg - That Oughta Sort It!"

In the face of ever mounting criticism following Manchester City's end of season disintegration, scarf wearing head coach, Roberto Mancini has announced that he has taken the first steps in the process of papering over the cracks with unsettled strik...

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Funny story: Mancini's Bum Cheeks Heard Squeaking In Stretford

Mancini's Bum Cheeks Heard Squeaking In Stretford

We're definitely into 'squeaky bum time' in the race for the Premiership, as Manchester's finest slug it out, and reports are flooding in that Roberto Mancini's bum could be heard squeaking from Stretford, some three miles across town. The bum squ...

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Funny story: Man Utd And Wolves Cause Sky Sports Cliché Punch-Up

Man Utd And Wolves Cause Sky Sports Cliché Punch-Up

Sky Sports viewers were horrified this afternoon when a couple of pundits started throwing punches at eachother. The fracas started at half-time in the match between Wolves and Manchester Utd. With Utd 3-0 up and Wolves reduced to ten men follo...

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Funny story: Rupert Murdoch tells how he almost closed down Man United

Rupert Murdoch tells how he almost closed down Man United

Rupert Murdoch has revealed how he considered closing down Manchester United after recent embarrassing results, before Charlies Angel wife Wendi pointed out that he doesn't own them. Writing on twitter yesterday he declared "Getting old, was going...

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Funny story: Man United To Play Like Athletic Bilbao In Title Run-In

Man United To Play Like Athletic Bilbao In Title Run-In

CARRINGTON - Man United insiders have revealed that Man United are to model their Premiership title charge on the team who finally booted them unceremoniously out of European competition. Athletic Bilbao. Sir Alex Ferguson offered no excuses fo...

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Funny story: Back For Good - United Leapfrog City To Go Top Again

Back For Good - United Leapfrog City To Go Top Again

Jubilant Manchester United fans flooded the streets of Kensington this afternoon after a Wayne Rooney brace secured three points at Old Trafford against West Bromwich Albion. Manchester City were defeated at Swansea by a late goal from Moore, leaving...

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Funny story: Man United quit midweek European matches because of 'busy fixture list'

Man United quit midweek European matches because of 'busy fixture list'

Manchester United Yankee owner Win Doe Glazer has decided that the team will withdraw from all European fixtures for the rest of the season. A United spokesman confirmed the withdrawal, which will happen after next weeks Europa League second leg...

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Funny story: Bay of Biscay opened up and swallowed a team of European tiddlers!

Bay of Biscay opened up and swallowed a team of European tiddlers!

The Spanish Armada was nothing compared to this show of Basque warfare. It seemed as though the stormy Bay of Biscay opened up and devoured a United team filled with European tiddlers! Wave after wave of them caught the "headless Tiddlers" swimmin...

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Funny story: Harry Redknapp accepts England job after Man United beat Tottenham Hotspur

Harry Redknapp accepts England job after Man United beat Tottenham Hotspur

Harry Redknapp performed a dramatic u-turn today, worthy of a cockney cab driver or posh Prime Minister, and accepted the England job even though the Football Association haven't offered it to him. Speaking at White Hart lane after Man United beat...

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