Mattel, the US toymaker, has recalled billions of toys for the second time in two weeks, because traces of the food additive Monosodium glutamate (MSG) were found in them.
LONDON (Defecated News) - The quiet leafy suburb of Northwood, Middlesex transformed into baby mayhem yesterday.
Paris Hilton has been reported to be gravely concerned for youth the world over.
MANASSAS, VA. (Heewack News Network) -- Just one ant survived a vicious massacre allegedly perpetrated by two eight-year-olds at a playground in this former Civil War city.
(San Francisco) - The ultra-liberal 9th Circuit Court of Appeals has ruled that time outs for children are unconstitutional and constitute abusive, cruel and unusual punishment.
Fukengrooven, Germany (IP) - Sources in Europe revealed today that they have intercepted a video recorded by Taliban Industries that displays a new line of toys that will soon be made available to Arab children.
BRITISH children are now such foul mouthed f*****g animals the Government is to spend 14 million f*****g pounds on drilling some manners into the little sh*ts.
The announcement of classes in behaviour and social education caused a storm when it h...
A family in Seattle, Washington was scared half-to-death last night, as they found a monster in their 6-year-old son's closet.
An attempt by EastEnders producers to warn young people about the dangers of 'sex', was a success, says the BBC, with switchboards jammed and emails pouring in to its website.
Selmer, Tennessee (WTF News) - In a bizarre and sad twist of fate, a charity event called 'Cars for Kids' turned tragic over the weekend resulting in horrendous injuries.
As humans, it is our basic biological drive to pro-create and bring children into the world. However, 9 times out of 10 we blunder into this folly without the slightest inkling of the cataclysmic life change that having kids brings about.
Parrish, WI - A teeming horde of upper elementary students at Wokum Elementary today rocked and tipped a Good Humor Ice Cream truck, its smoldering hull still visible by the curbside. During 2nd recess break from classes, an unsuspecting and hapless...
Are you a parent afraid of lashing out at your child? Kids can be so sensitive these days! Calling your eleven year old daughter a little pig can get you in a world of trouble. Not only will your child be upset, but the authorities will have a field day at your expense. Don't be victimized!...
Washington, D.C. - Secretary of Defense Robert Gates defended the administration's imprisonment of an undisclosed number of children at the U.S. Navy base in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.
Everyone has heard of the drugs for kids who are dumb, stupid and can't focus. But what about those kids who over-acheive? Nerds? Geeks? Chess Club? What about them?!...
Redneck Gap, Mississippi - Researchers at the Mississippi Institute of Technology's Che Guevara Medical School have just concluded a multiyear study to determine a possible link between pregnancy in women and subsequent childbirth.
SPRINGFIELD, COLORADO--(BREAKING NEWS) An FBI task force swooped in and arrested 38 Springfield Junior High School students with ages ranging from 10 to 15 years old & 2 adults on serious I.D. theft...
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