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Funny satire stories about Football (Soccer)

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Funny story: Football Club Promotes Stray Dog from Assistant to Head Coach

Football Club Promotes Stray Dog from Assistant to Head Coach

The heart-warming story of Tesapara, the stray dog who became the coach's assistant at Paraguayan second-tier side Club Sporting 2 de Mayo has taken a new turn after club owner Pancho Bonanza promoted her to head coach and dismissed the incumbent Car...

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Funny story: Football Gossip. September 2018

Football Gossip. September 2018

Manchester United has denied that its fans created a crowd funding campaign to get manager Jose Mourinho jailed in Spain for tax fraud. United's executive vice-chairman Ed Woodward admitted that he had paid personally for an appeal to increase the so...

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Funny story: Mourinho 'Gets Suspended Jail Sentence' for Tax Fraud: Manchester United Fans to Appeal

Mourinho 'Gets Suspended Jail Sentence' for Tax Fraud: Manchester United Fans to Appeal

Angry Manchester United fans raised a call today for crowdfunding an appeal to get their team's manager, José Mourinho, jailed after he reached a deal with the Spanish state on a one-year suspended sentence in a long-running tax fraud case. Famous...

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Funny story: Unclear on the Concept, Trump Offers to Host Next Year's World Cup

Unclear on the Concept, Trump Offers to Host Next Year's World Cup

Mar-A-Lago-Lago, FL Donald Trump tweeted that he didn't get to watch the World Cup this year because he was too busy being President and helping out on Fox and Friends. Trump then tweeted that he loves football and always cheers whenever the tea...

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Funny story: Where are they now? Football hit singles

Where are they now? Football hit singles

"We've made it to the first qualifying round of the Birmingham Spaghetti Junction All Comers' Floodlight trophy. I know, let's make a record." There was once a time when even the most mundane event in a football team's history would spawn a record release, but now thankfully it seems that these mind numbing ditties have died a death. Apparently it all started in the 1930s with Arsenal releas...

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Funny story: Norwich City paints away team's dressing room pink

Norwich City paints away team's dressing room pink

Norwich City luvvie director Stephen Fry was heard to say "Just wait until Sir Elton hears about this" when told that his club has painted the away team's dressing room deep pink in an attempt to gain an edge on opponents. Pink is reputed to be a...

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Funny story: Steve McClaren Seen Holding A Towel

Steve McClaren Seen Holding A Towel

Steve McClaren, the new Queens Park Rangers team manager, is thought to be urgently 'reconsidering his position', after his side were treated to a 7-1 drubbing by West Bromwich Albion at the Hawthorns, yesterday. The former England boss was seen b...

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Funny story: Merde On The Orient Express

Merde On The Orient Express

There was a major controversy in South London on Saturday afternoon, when French football supporters travelling to a game in Leytonstone were confronted by a problem they could not, in their wildest dreams, ever have imagined - a merde on the Orient...

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Funny story: The Pre-Season Games

The Pre-Season Games

Professional “bitcher” and part time Manchester United manager, Jose Mourinho, has claimed unless he’s allowed to sign all the players he wants, United could have a “very difficult season”. He is quoted as saying: "My CEO knows what I want. I k...

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Funny story: Women's Football Commentary Comes Under Fire

Women's Football Commentary Comes Under Fire

A survey amongst 3,000 football supporters of both sexes and all ages, to ascertain their opinions on female commentators of football matches, has concluded that the ladies should probably get back in their kitchens. Recent controversies involving...

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Funny story: Football Returns After Never Even Stopping

Football Returns After Never Even Stopping

Football returns today and up and down the country fanatical fans are rejoicing, even though it doesn't appear to have ever actually been away. With the World Cup having started soon after the domestic season, then the International Champions Cup...

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Funny story: Harry Maguire Turns Down Manchester United Move As He Fucking Hates Them

Harry Maguire Turns Down Manchester United Move As He Fucking Hates Them

Harry Maguire, the Leicester City and England defender, has turned down the opportunity to join Manchester United, saying he fucking hates them. Maguire, 25, was born in Sheffield, and has always been a Sheffield United supporter. As such, there...

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Funny story: Jason Statham Doesn't Really Like His Name

Jason Statham Doesn't Really Like His Name

English movie actor, heart-throb Jason Statham, has told confidential friends that he doesn't really like his first name. The tough-guy actor who has starred in 'Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels', 'Snatch', the 'Transporter' trilogy, 'Fast and...

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Funny story: Where are they now? Winston Bogarde, "Footballer"

Where are they now? Winston Bogarde, "Footballer"

Don't you just love this man? Well, maybe you haven't heard of him, unlike the Chelsea football fans to whom he is notorious, although they barely saw him. He had the most infamous contract in football. Our Dutch hero played for Ajax until 1998 when he signed for Barcelona, so he wasn't half bad, and played for Barça 19 times while they won La Liga and the Copa del Rey. On the advice of comp...

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Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: World Cup Shambles, My Personal Roundup

The Secret England Footballer: World Cup Shambles, My Personal Roundup

By the time you read this, I'll be back in Blighty doing the biz with the owner's daughter again. Just what I need and so does she. We'll be off to Ibiza for some pre-season R&R shortly. Well, never let it be said that I didn't do my best for...

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Funny story: Golden Shower Dampens World Cup Final Celebrations

Golden Shower Dampens World Cup Final Celebrations

France and Croatia provided a stunning finale to the World Cup last night, and, in a wonderful show of footballing skills, the French ran out 4-2 victors. Sadly, there was an unfortunate footnote to the tournament, when an argument broke out over the...

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Funny story: England: Fourth Place Is Coming Home!

England: Fourth Place Is Coming Home!

Let the celebrations begin! The England football team, so often derided in the past and labelled 'disappointing' at major tournaments, have at last 'completed the job', 'delivered the goods', and, in one last pathetic strain for a brilliant flower...

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