Coronavirus is not like a broken leg. Coronavirus is contagious. It is a deadly contagion. That means you can catch it from someone who is standing too close to you, is not wearing a mask, and you can die. Dying is forever. A broken leg is temporary.
The Coronavirus, COVID-19, that all-pervading nuisance that has entered into every facet of worldwide society on an unprecedented scale, has even left its indelible mark on, of all things, music. As the music-loving sector of the general public st...
TOAD SUCK, Arkansas – The local television station reported that police received a call about a very unusual situation. A police officer with the Toad Suck Police Department paid a visit to 97-year-old retired seamstress, Minnie Faye Titlaufer.
SIOUX CITY, Iowa – One of the most uncaring, negligent individuals in the entire nation has just been arrested. Spaulding K. Pintucker, 40, who has worked as a hairstylist at the Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow Hair Saloon for 18 years, told authoritie...
Ypsilanti, Michigan - A recent visitor to the Ford manufacturing facility here was reported to be concerned that being seen in a protective mask, as is required by company and state policy to prevent spread of the coronavirus, might ruin his carefull…
Providing a progressive perspective on lifestyle and current events, independent news show Common Nonsense recently broke several revelatory stories, beginning with news that certain studies suggest that sugar might not be very good for you. “Cont...
Sir Elton John, the Godfather of Glam, the Pontiff of the Piano, and the Royal Blower of the Pink Oboe, has said he has been busy during the current lockdown in respect of the Coronavirus, and has written several new songs employing his new musical l...
A man who is completely au fait with every one of the government's anti-Coronavirus precautions, and strictly adheres to them, had a crisis earlier this afternoon, when he unwittingly and inadvertently touched his own face. This was after touching...
BALTIMORE – The first daughter, Ivanka Trump, was in Baltimore visiting one of her favorite cousins this week. She was asked by reporters how she was feeling. She softly asked "Why, what have you heard?" One reporter said that most of the media...
NEW ORLEANS - Local authorities have just announced that they were tipped off about a strip club that was operating under very lax conditions. Lt. Benzell Keckle, with the NOPD, said that the club called The Booby Trap, had just recently opened, a...
With the recommencement of the Premier League season just around the corner, and the news, earlier today, that six players from three PL clubs have tested positive for the Coronavirus, COVID-19, Manchester United captain, Harry Maguire, has spoken ou...
Witnessing comedy clubs implementing contactless temperature-monitoring of guests and people going for their daily jog in face masks, all in the name of curbing the spread of a disease comparable in severity to the flu, Nate Parker of Nashville, Tenn...
Dr. Anthony Fauci is a conflicted man these days. He believes that the medications that a patient takes is no one’s business other than the patient and the patient’s physician. Accordingly, on one hand, he is not troubled by President Trump’s is ta...
Presidential Womble and all round flappy-handed lunatic, Donald Trump, has admitted he is taking hydroxychloroquine in an attempt to fight off Coronavirus. Having been informed by multiple health officials that “this shit does not work”, the Trumpste...
With some derogatorily categorizing the swathes of Americans paralyzed in blind, terrified acceptance of whatever the mainstream media tells them regarding the threat posed by COVID-19 as "sheeple," actual sheep are objecting to being lumped in with...
The Coronavirus, COVID-19, is said to have surfaced in Wuhan, China, in January this year, but French scientists claim that patients on whom they ran tests in November 2019, were already carrying the virus. So far, we know very little about it as...
As a number of states begin to loosen up their COVID-19 lockdowns, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has partnered with extermination service Mosquito Joe to help people rid their backyards of the coronavirus and other pests that could p...
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