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Funny satire stories about Football (American)

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Funny story: Buffalo Bill Ryan Fitzpatrick is not Exceeding Expectations in Bed, Lover Says

Buffalo Bill Ryan Fitzpatrick is not Exceeding Expectations in Bed, Lover Says

Ryan Fitzpatrick has recently come under attack by a mysterious voice recording. His troubles started this week when a weird pornographic tape was distributed by Fitzpatrick's lover, who wishes to be referred to as the "Lover." In the tape, it's a...

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Funny story: Techno Viking dub steps Romo into coma

Techno Viking dub steps Romo into coma

After Sunday's embarrassing performance to the Eagles, the Techno Viking challenged Dallas quarterback Tony Romo to a 50-yard line dance off. With all his dignity already stripped, Tony had nothing to lose by accepting the challenge. To a...

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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones Begs Troy Aikman To Please Come Out of Retirement

Dallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones Begs Troy Aikman To Please Come Out of Retirement

DALLAS - Jerry Jones told his wife that he is tired as hell of watching his Dallas Cowboys team ride the damnedest roller coaster ride this side of hell. He said one week they win big and the next week they look like Slippery Rock College. He said...

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Funny story: Rex Ryan Complains that Wes Welker's Statistics Should be Cut in Half

Rex Ryan Complains that Wes Welker's Statistics Should be Cut in Half

After defeating the San Diego Chargers in a thrilling comeback, New York Jets head coach, Rex Ryan, in a press conference refused to talk about his team's accomplishments on the field and instead garnered his sites on his division rival, the New Engl...

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Funny story: The NFL Fines 49ers Coach Jim Harbaugh and Lions Coach Jim Schwartz Plus Requires Them To Attend Anger Management Classes

The NFL Fines 49ers Coach Jim Harbaugh and Lions Coach Jim Schwartz Plus Requires Them To Attend Anger Management Classes

NEW YORK CITY - A spokesperson for the National Football League has stated that league officials after reviewing the post game video of the game between the San Francisco 49ers and the Detroit Lions have issued a decision on the after-the-game alterc...

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Funny story: Hank Williams Jr. asks ESPN for his job back because he misspoke

Hank Williams Jr. asks ESPN for his job back because he misspoke

LOS ANGELES - On Wednesday afternoon ESPN executives sat down with Hank Williams Jr. in what appeared to be a second chance. Witnesses confirmed that Hank was seen going into the building with a shaved face, hair combed, and a subway sandwich in his...

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Funny story: Hank Williams Jr. & Harold Camping unite to end the world together

Hank Williams Jr. & Harold Camping unite to end the world together

After twenty-three years of performing the first act for Americans in the National Football League's most popular game of the week, Monday Night Football, reality-famous equivalent Hank Williams Jr. has written his last country music record for ESPN,...

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Funny story: Raiders name deceased Davis "Eternal Owner"

Raiders name deceased Davis "Eternal Owner"

OAKLAND, CA-Shortly following the announcement of longtime Raiders owner Al Davis' death Saturday, the Oakland Raiders released a statement saying that even though Davis was now gone, he would forever symbolically remain the owner of the Oakland Raid...

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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones Convinces Brett Favre To Come Out Of Retirement And Join The Cowboys

Dallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones Convinces Brett Favre To Come Out Of Retirement And Join The Cowboys

DALLAS - The Dallas Cowboys took a commanding 24 point lead (27-3) against the Detroit Lions into the third quarter but when the game ended the Cowboys found themselves on the losing end 34-30. Millions of Cowboys fans looked on in total disbelief...

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Funny story: Dan Bailey and The Dallas Cowboys Defeat The Washington Redskins 18-16 On The Rookie's Amazing Six Field Goal Performance

Dan Bailey and The Dallas Cowboys Defeat The Washington Redskins 18-16 On The Rookie's Amazing Six Field Goal Performance

DALLAS - Well it's a good thing that the Dallas Cowboys have someone who knows how to kick field goals because Tony Romo, and the Cowboy receivers and running backs apparently should have Googled Map Quest to find out exactly where the end zone was l...

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Funny story: The Indianapolis Colts Have Just Signed An Amazing 13-Year-Old Kick Return Specialist

The Indianapolis Colts Have Just Signed An Amazing 13-Year-Old Kick Return Specialist

INDIANAPOLIS - The Indianapolis Colts have just lost their second game and are now 0-2 and off to their worst start in recent memory. The coaches, players, and fans all point to the fact that the team is certainly missing the services of its star...

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Funny story: Winless Colts Reach Out to Doug Flutie to Save Season!

Winless Colts Reach Out to Doug Flutie to Save Season!

The Indianapolis Colts, 0-2 for the first time in over a decade, have reached out to retired Quarterback Icon Doug Flutie in order to try and save their season! Franchise Q-Back Peyton Manning is out for the season, and despite 3 controversial nec...

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Funny story: NFL Week 2 Highlights

NFL Week 2 Highlights

NFL Week 2 Highlights Packers 30, Panthers 23: Cam Newton passes for 432 yards against the Pack, which experts feel may distract most of the country from his three interceptions. New England 35, San Diego 21: Vice Wilfork earns his first career interception, demonstrating in 15 seconds more athleticism and awareness than Tony Romo has in his entire life. Buffalo 38, Oakland 35: Buffa...

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Funny story: NFL Set To Investigate Reports of Romo's Testosterone Shots Prior to Game Time!

NFL Set To Investigate Reports of Romo's Testosterone Shots Prior to Game Time!

Dallas Cowboy's Q-Back (no pun intended) is said to be a target of an investigation of the NFL's Drug Police after it was revealed that the effeminate, fumble fingered signal caller had resorted to several shots of testosterone prior to Sunday's ga...

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Funny story: Dallas QB Romo Blames Meltdown on Crack Addiction!

Dallas QB Romo Blames Meltdown on Crack Addiction!

When Dallas quarterback Tony Romo finally emerged from hiding after the sure win against the Jets turned into an incredible loss thanks to his monumental three (3) brain farts, he blamed it on his addiction to wearing crotchless panties under his cup...

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Funny story: Dallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones Blames Their 20-7 Loss To The San Diego Chargers on The Cowboys Cheerleaders

Dallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones Blames Their 20-7 Loss To The San Diego Chargers on The Cowboys Cheerleaders

DALLAS - The owner of the Dallas Cowboys Jerry Jones has promised all of the Cowboys season ticket holders that the team will win more games this season than they did last year or else he'll gladly refund their money no questions asked. The Cowboy...

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Funny story: Sarah Palin Says That If She Is Elected President She Will Move The Green Bay Packers To Anchorage, Alaska

Sarah Palin Says That If She Is Elected President She Will Move The Green Bay Packers To Anchorage, Alaska

YPSILANTI, Michigan - Sarah Palin told a crowd of supporters gathered at a Dunkin Donuts parking lot that if she is elected president she will be making a big change in the sports world. The former ex-governor of Alaska who says she is a die-hard...

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