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Funny story: Paralympics To Be As Big As Olympics - But More Scary!

Paralympics To Be As Big As Olympics - But More Scary!

After the sensational spectacle of the Beijing Olympic Games, now comes the Paralympics on Saturday, and the organisers are saying they expect them to be every bit as good as the main Games, and a damned sight more uncomfortable for those who are a b...

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Funny story: British Bulldogs To Be Olympic 2012 Event

British Bulldogs To Be Olympic 2012 Event

Lord Sebastian & Co., the Chair of the London Organising Committee of the London Olympic and Paralympic Games has announced in a statement the new sports that will be included in the 2012 London Games. Of primary interest to people in this cou...

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Funny story: 2012 Olympics Begin Early, China Already Ahead By 10 Gold Medals

2012 Olympics Begin Early, China Already Ahead By 10 Gold Medals

The 2008 Beijing Summer Olympics are a sweet memory for some countries such as the U.S. and China, or an embarrassment for the likes of Togo and Moldova, who were expecting to get more than one medal and 10 ass-kickings each. Worry not, Togo, b...

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Funny story: 2012 Opening Games Ceremony to be held in Tessa Jowell's Back Garden

2012 Opening Games Ceremony to be held in Tessa Jowell's Back Garden

London - Olympics Minister Tessa Jowell today announced that the opening ceremony for the 2012 Games will 'not be in the stadium', but will, instead be held in her back garden in Cromwell Terrace, SE18. "We don't want to be copycats and do it like...

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Funny story: Home Secretary livid at "Team GB's" medal results

Home Secretary livid at "Team GB's" medal results

The Home Secretary, Jacqui Smith is said to be "absolutey livid", "gobsmacked" and even "most upset" with the medals won by Team GB at the recent Olympics held in Beijing. This morning, she called Lord Coe into her office and her rantings and ravi...

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Funny story: 2012 Olympic foreign athletics are learning to speak Urdu, not English

2012 Olympic foreign athletics are learning to speak Urdu, not English

Many foreign athletics are now preparing for the 2012 Olympics to be held in London by learning Urdu, and surprisingly not English. Urdu language classes are becoming increasingly popular and are springing up from China to Paraguay as foreign ath...

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Funny story: Tony Blair Claims Team GB is a Complete Failure

Tony Blair Claims Team GB is a Complete Failure

Ex-Prime Minister Tony Blair has angered current PM Gordon Brown and other leading ministers tonight, by saying in a speech that, far from being an overwhelming success, Team GB has been a failure and an unmitigated disaster! Mr Blair was speaking...

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Funny story: Team GB Golden Olympic Jumbo Nose Cone Missing!

Team GB Golden Olympic Jumbo Nose Cone Missing!

The golden nose cone that was put onto the front of the British Airways jumbo that brought Team GB back from their record breaking gold medals haul at the Beijing Olympics has gone missing. The cone (said to be actually cast out of pure bullion bars)...

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Funny story: David Beckham Tells A Really Good Joke

David Beckham Tells A Really Good Joke

David Beckham, the England footballer, had members of the Press in stitches yesterday at the closing ceremony of the Beijing Olympic Games, where he was appearing solely for the purpose of kicking a football once from the top of a London double-decke...

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Funny story: Word 'hero' to be redefined to include people who can run a bit

Word 'hero' to be redefined to include people who can run a bit

Collins, the makers of the famous Oxford English Dictionary, have announced that the word 'hero' is set to be given a wider definition in the next edition. The change has been in response to BBC Coverage of the Olympic Games. 'Yeah sure there are...

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Funny story: Boris' "British Spirit" to the fore as 2012 looms

Boris' "British Spirit" to the fore as 2012 looms

As Great Britain rejoices at securing its largest gold medal haul in a century, Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson - surrealist, Matt Lucas impersonator and part-time Mayor of London - has asked that the public call on "a bit of twaditional Bwitish s...

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Funny story: China Plans To Euthanize Paralympic Athletes

China Plans To Euthanize Paralympic Athletes

It was revealed today that China plans to euthanize all of the athletes at the conclusion of the Paralympics. These games, which traditionally follow shortly after the standard Olympics, are for handicapped athletes and include standard events in wh...

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Funny story: Fart to Gold in London 2012

Fart to Gold in London 2012

Olympic Chiefs have decided to include Farting into the London 2012 Olympic Games. The Olympic Panel Committee agreed unanimously that if they were going to have silly events like Gymnastic Ribbon Twirling & Synchronized Swimming in the Olympi...

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Funny story: Red Ken Grabs Olympic Flag from Boris Notgoodenough!

Red Ken Grabs Olympic Flag from Boris Notgoodenough!

In a startling event at the Bird's nest in beijing during the closing ceremonies, former London Mayor Ken Livingstone ran onto the podium and spirited the Olympic flag away from the meaty paws of recently elected Boris Johnson! Livingstone did in...

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Funny story: Queen To Bestow Honours Upon Olympic Heroes

Queen To Bestow Honours Upon Olympic Heroes

In a Royal Proclamation, Her Majesty the Queen has announced that she is to recognise the superhuman efforts of Britain's athletes who have taken gold in Beijing. The news was made public as Team GB flew back into the UK today. Recipients of the Q...

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Funny story: Lord Coe makes London Olympics official

Lord Coe makes London Olympics official

At the closing ceremony of the 2008 Olympics, which were not only held in China, but were actually held this year AND at the end of the Olympics, Lord Coe, the former not-Lord Coe, flew the flag for Britain and London at the Olympic Flame ceremony.

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Funny story: London 2012 Will Be Quintessentially English, Says Mayor Boris Johnson

London 2012 Will Be Quintessentially English, Says Mayor Boris Johnson

The 2012 London Olympics will be typically English, and every bit as good as the Beijing Games. So says London Mayor Boris Johnson, who also promised that the Games would not run over the £100billion budget. Mayor Johnson said that London 2012 was...

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