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Funny story: U.K. Male Life Expectancy On The Rise

U.K. Male Life Expectancy On The Rise

The number of men in Britain that has a reasonable chance of getting a life has risen dramatically in the last 10 years, according to a study published by the Social Policy Foundation. The SPF claims that ,since the stigma attached to males living on their own has virtually disappeared, most single males(who would previously have cohabited with or even married the first woman that took any kind...

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Funny story: Sir Alan Signs Cereal Deal

Sir Alan Signs Cereal Deal

Super Businessman and inventor of TV's 'The Apprentice' Sir Alan has teamed up with those loveable rascals Jedward to launch a new cereal to get Britain's kids eating healthily. Twins Noel and Keith Jedward were only too keen to make even more mon...

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Funny story: Saturated fat isn't just for Eskimos - it could save your life!

Saturated fat isn't just for Eskimos - it could save your life!

Six foot three inch catwalk model and aspiring weather presenter Thinna Zarake went on the record on primetime TV today to condemn the widely-held conviction that eating saturated fat is always bad for your health. Miss Zarake openly attacked BBC One Show presenters Nick Famous and Alison Shortskirt for their condemnation of the high percentage of saturated fat in the nation's diet. "You t...

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Funny story: Fit wealthy people to face certain death

Fit wealthy people to face certain death

New research has revealed that people who undertake fitness routines and who observe careful diets are at least as likely to die as people who smoke, are obese, or both. This is especially true if they are also loaded. James Ward, professor of uns...

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Funny story: Fish Pedicures Under Investigation

Fish Pedicures Under Investigation

A controversial new treatment is under investigation from health experts after concerns were raised that it might be linked to infections. The latest craze is called fish pedicures and this involves Garra Rufa fish nibbling away at people's feet t...

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Funny story: Mobile Phones Linked To Brain Damage: Bad News For Al-Queda

Mobile Phones Linked To Brain Damage: Bad News For Al-Queda

Recent reports into the effects of using a mobile phone on the brain were welcomed throughout the world community yesterday. Although slow to admit it, most major mobile phone giants have accepted there is a risk of brain dysfunction over middle...

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Funny story: The true number of NHS cutbacks revealed

The true number of NHS cutbacks revealed

Under The Freedom of Information Act to true extent of the cutbacks is becoming painfully clear. Andrew Lansley, the Health Secretary has admitted when contacted that it is true, they are sacking all the doctors and nurses but keeping administrative...

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Funny story: Breastfeeding Is Key to Healthy Eating!

Breastfeeding Is Key to Healthy Eating!

Scientists believe that breastfeeding mothers can influence what their child will prefer eating in later life. If they want their child to enjoy eating vegetables that they should eat vegetables whilst they are breastfeeding (well not at the same tim...

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Funny story: Blood Pressure Diagnosis Errors Cause Rise In Blood Pressure

Blood Pressure Diagnosis Errors Cause Rise In Blood Pressure

Doctors and nurses around the country are reporting a sudden rise in patients' blood pressure today. The news follows hard on the heels of reports that millions of people have been wrongly diagnosed with hypertension. Said Dr Liz Stethoscope, o...

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Funny story: Health & Welfare, NHS Overwhelmed as "Sniffing Fad" Causes Melt Down In London!

Health & Welfare, NHS Overwhelmed as "Sniffing Fad" Causes Melt Down In London!

A new fad, thought to be from the Colonies, has brought health service workers and care facilities to their knees as thousands of Brits have begun sniffing the weirdest things causing Health & Safety Officials to issue a Public Health Warning!...

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Funny story: Future News: Common Cold Epidemic Spreading

Future News: Common Cold Epidemic Spreading

(Published 2040) - BRUSSELS, EUROPEAN STATES - Scientists in the capital have detected traces of a 'common cold'. CC was wiped out in early 2020, and has not surfaced since. However, due to the lack of immunity among today's human and xeno populat...

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Funny story: Pessimism to be come 'cause of death' - NHS

Pessimism to be come 'cause of death' - NHS

Patients who display pessimism in the ability of the NHS to make them better often leads to a self fulfilling prophecy containing an untimely passing that is totally and utterly of the patients own making, according to researchers. The research sh...

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Funny story: Keep Fit At Work for U.K. Employees

Keep Fit At Work for U.K. Employees

Medical researchers are recommending that exercise apparati should be introduced into British workplaces to improve employees' health. U.S. scientists said sedentary habits were one of the greatest dangers to workers health in the 21st Century and...

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Funny story: Health Warning Over New Procedure

Health Warning Over New Procedure

Medical experts are united in their condemnation of the latest cosmetic craze that is sweeping the globe. Bollocks enhancement is especially popular in 3rd world countries, particularly in South America where big balls are regarded as attractive and...

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Funny story: New Twist for Sex Education

New Twist for Sex Education

A senior Iranian cleric has emphasised the need for women not to dress promiscuously or there would be severe consequences not only for them but for the rest of Iranian society. In a speech made in Tehran, Hoiatoleslam Kazem Sedighi told worshippe...

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Funny story: More Amazing Statistics

More Amazing Statistics

Rising life expectancies and improved health means the population is ageing much more slowly than at the end of last century. The US and Austrian study in the well respected Science magazine makes a number of amazing discoveries. The study also...

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Funny story: Fat is Fatter

Fat is Fatter

As people become more and more obese it is becoming clear that fat people are getting fatter. Hospital beds are collapsing and ambulances are getting puctures because of extereme fatties. Minister of Health, Egbert Skinny, explained to an audie...

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