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Spoof stories written by Skews Me

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Funny story: Suits

Suits

It's said a suit makes the man, but I have to argue that the man makes the suit. Suits are considered the professional attire of businessmen, but I beg to differ that they're the uniform of conformists. Sure they may look good when suited to a specific region and time, but in all actuality they are just overpriced if not dangerous clothing. It doesn't seem that long ago that the cut of the jib...

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Funny story: Spring Cleaning

Spring Cleaning

With Spring just around the corner, I decided the first thing I'd clean would be my wallet. Nearly two inches thick, my billfold has become just too unwieldy for my back pocket. While this isn't a problem at home, commuting can be a pain in the...you know what I mean. The first thing to go was the month's worth of debit card receipts accumulated from the local grocery stores. It's not often I c...

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Funny story: Tons of marijuana discovered at school

Tons of marijuana discovered at school

Two and a half tons of marijuana was discovered in an Afghani school, leading authorities to inspect other students' lockers only to discover twice that much in opium stashed away. "These enemy combatants think they can hide their drugs from us?"...

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Funny story: Necktie bandits wanted for wave of assaults

Necktie bandits wanted for wave of assaults

Police reports regarding so-called "necktie bandits" have been flooding emergency phone centers as the rise of assaults on businessmen have been increasing around cities' financial districts. Assailants are grabbing the neckties of passersby and f...

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Funny story: Paint the halls with learning brain cells

Paint the halls with learning brain cells

(Seattle) University of Washington's C-9 Live Mach 1 Telescreen more than lives up to its name in sophistication. Applied as paint, the inexpensive video display Live processors incorporate multi-spectrum cameras, HyperSonic Sound, and neural netw...

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Funny story: Picture Perfect Pets

Picture Perfect Pets

Charter Industrial Applications announced today their new suite of Picture Perfect Pets home security systems applications. The interactive home protection devices are available in a wide range of species including the popular Tribble from the ori...

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Funny story: Addicts: We porn dump at the meetings

Addicts: We porn dump at the meetings

Support groups of individuals addicted to pornography are a growing trend. Therapists report that for their clients it is the only way they can achieve sexual gratification, but most refuse to destroy their collections. These sexual obsessions hav...

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Funny story: Child's Tesla-inspired invention draws investors, critics

Child's Tesla-inspired invention draws investors, critics

(Seattle, WA) An eighth grade school science fair project involving the assembly of a homemade quartz crystal radio evolved into much more when student Bart Starr Sampson stumbled upon the research of inventor Nikola Tesla after wondering how the Tes...

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Funny story: Ancient brain surgery rediscovered in Greece

Ancient brain surgery rediscovered in Greece

Today's headline news out of Europe reports of archaeologists discovering an ancient skeleton of a young woman in the Greek city of Veria that apparently underwent a medical procedure known as trepaning (or trephining).

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Funny story: Doomsday Vault opens

Doomsday Vault opens

Norway made world news recently with the opening of a Doomsday Vault close to the North Pole to safeguard seed stocks that haven't been genetically modified.

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Funny story: Drugs in our drinking water

Drugs in our drinking water

Yahoo! News recently reported of an Associated Press investigation into the quality of drinking water that discovered minute amounts of pharmaceuticals including antibiotics, anti-convulsants, mood stabilizers and sex hormones.

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Funny story: Dumbed down generation

Dumbed down generation

A recent study found that people over the age of 30 have better memories than younger adults schooled in public and private education.

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Funny story: Kentucky introduces bill banning anonymous internet posting

Kentucky introduces bill banning anonymous internet posting

WTVQ in Lexington, Kentucky recently reported that state representative Tim Couch wants to make anonymous internet posting illegal.

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Funny story: Thank you for this bounty for which we are about to receive

Thank you for this bounty for which we are about to receive

Lord? Thank you for this bounty for which we are about to receive. I'd like to especially thank the migrant workers who culled the crops so that we could purchase the products conveniently at our local grocier.

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Funny story: Sputnik dog to be recovered

Sputnik dog to be recovered

On October 23, NASA plans to launch yet another shuttle mission into space. News leaked by insiders today reports of them attempting to retrieve the dead dog from Russia's 1957 Sputnik-2 experiment into space travel.

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Funny story: Focusing on sexy

Focusing on sexy

Researchers at the University of Florida studied what people actually look at when the objects are beautiful people reports the September issue of the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.

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Funny story: First Annual Green Website Footprint Awards

First Annual Green Website Footprint Awards

Many news website surfers have seen the all-too-familiar Printer Friendly buttons offered to convert the mess of formatted text, navigation bars and advertisements into something more easily rendered onto paper pages for individual consumption.

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