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Funny story: Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Kirstie Alley, Wynonna Judd, and Niecy Nash To Star in The Vampire Epic, "The Vampire Diet"

Robert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart, Kirstie Alley, Wynonna Judd, and Niecy Nash To Star in The Vampire Epic, "The Vampire Diet"

HOLLYWOOD - Two of Tinsel Town's leading producers, brothers Amaretto and Staccato Monteverdi have joined together to film the vampire epic, The Vampire Diet. Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart purchased the rights to the Alec Swishtoot penned n...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Sell Their Vampire Sux Bar & Grill To The Dixie Chicks

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Sell Their Vampire Sux Bar & Grill To The Dixie Chicks

HOUSTON - After being the owners of The Vampire Sux Bar & Grill in Houston for only three months, Rob Pattinson and Kris Stewart have decided that the restaurant business is not for them. Pattinson said that both are just too busy with their v...

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Funny story: Wal-Mart Has Sold Out of The Vuvuzela Vampire Action Figure Dolls

Wal-Mart Has Sold Out of The Vuvuzela Vampire Action Figure Dolls

LITTLE ROCK, Arkansas - A spokesperson for the largest retail chain in the world has just stated that every single franchise chain store has completely sold out of The Vuvuzela Vampire Action Figure Dolls. The giant retailer has said that they hav...

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Funny story: Kristen Stewart Says She Is Very Sorry About Her Stupid Ass Rape Remark

Kristen Stewart Says She Is Very Sorry About Her Stupid Ass Rape Remark

LOS ANGELES - The star of The Twilight Saga vampire movies Kristen Stewart has issued an apology apologizing about having made some way out of line remarks. Stewart reportedly said to a reporter for Great Britain's Elle Em En Ooh Pee Magazine that...

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Funny story: Vampire Finally Arrives In Whitby - Mocks Twilight Movies

Vampire Finally Arrives In Whitby - Mocks Twilight Movies

Renowned Transylvanian vampire, Nosferatu, aka Max Shreck, finally arrived in the Yorkshire port of Whitby last night after an arduous sea crossing on a sailing ship which left the crew dead, and the Captain, also dead, lashed to the wheel. As ass...

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Funny story: Real Vampire Almost Ruined Twilight Movie, Series.

Real Vampire Almost Ruined Twilight Movie, Series.

Apparently among the young people of the Twilight filming was a real vampire, disguised as a prop. Immediately after the filming, Nosferatu, made his way out, unknown until someone asked the question, "Where's that extra coffin used in the first half...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson Considering The Bat Man Role

Robert Pattinson Considering The Bat Man Role

A new movie proposal is being considered by Robert Pattinson, in the title role of The Bat Man! No, it isn't Batman, but The Bat Man. According to the writers, this will be an adventure comedy role here the Bat Man who DOES fight crime, but is act...

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Funny story: Vampire Jack Michaelson Laid To Rest At Last

Vampire Jack Michaelson Laid To Rest At Last

Los Angeles, California - Vampiric child molester, crotch grabber, and aspiring dancer, Jack Michaelson was today finally laid under the sod, once and for all. The interment ceremony took place today before a handful of anaemic looking people who...

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Funny story: New Type Of Vampire Discovered

New Type Of Vampire Discovered

A new, terrifying species of vampire has been discovered that has begun a feeding frenzy throughout the world. The horrifying part is that it haunts the least likely of places- your local bank! This vampire is a new one for the books- it feeds...

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Funny story: 'I'm not a vampire', Hillary Clinton claims

'I'm not a vampire', Hillary Clinton claims

The new American Secretary of State Hillary Clinton made the surprising claim that she is not a blood-sucking vampire. Speaking from the White House, as the sun went down over Washington DC, Mrs Clinton said: 'I don't know where these crazy rumors...

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Funny story: The Vampire And The Vamp

The Vampire And The Vamp

The vampire waited patiently, ravenously in the dark alley. His never ending thirst was a suction within himself that pulled and tore at every organ. Weakened by lack of finding a victim for several nights, he knew he must find one tonight or suffer...

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Funny story: Vampire suspected in case of missing blood

Vampire suspected in case of missing blood

The Monroe County Blood Bucket Facility was robbed last night by a pale-skinned vampire just after midnight. The nocturnal thief stole every single container of Type A blood, leading authorities to believe the bloodsucker is in fact Type A himself. I...

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