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Funny satire stories about tesco

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Funny story: lt's Tesco - not the benefits office!

lt's Tesco - not the benefits office!

There has been plenty of time to change the points in the Tesco Big Christmas Exchange deal offered to double the value of points and vouchers held on the Clubcards used by millions of customers. Some people did with ease. They bought their barga...

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Funny story: NHS follow Tesco in budget cuts latest

NHS follow Tesco in budget cuts latest

Designed to speed up waiting systems, make the whole "4 hour rule" look like the piece of shit that it is as well as make it cheaper for the NHS in terms of wages: hospitals in Wales are the first to try out "DIY Operation Station". The area allow...

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Funny story: UK's largest supermarket chain, Tesco's, now sell viagra to the oldest "swingers" in town!

UK's largest supermarket chain, Tesco's, now sell viagra to the oldest "swingers" in town!

Tesco, Britain's largest supermarket chain, is selling viagra without prescriptions to ageing, "drooping, low-hanging" males. Tesco's stores are being invaded by desperate males hoping for a last chance to impress their partners before "having a h...

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Funny story: Tesco Viagra. A very little, helps.

Tesco Viagra. A very little, helps.

The supermarket Tesco says it is to start selling Viagra over the counter at the 'cheapest price'. As of next week, men who need a little help in the meat and two veg isle, will be able to pick up the 'put him up and stay up' pick me up pill from...

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Funny story: Tesco sold for £1

Tesco sold for £1

Tesco is to be sold for £1 after it has emerged staff in Cardiff have been giving credit or 'tick' to family members for the past 4yrs. Bankers stated the fraudulent situation would of been manageable for the odd loaf or pint of milk but since the...

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Funny story: Government Cuts: Rebuilding of Stonehenge now in doubt

Government Cuts: Rebuilding of Stonehenge now in doubt

Hidden among the cuts announced by the government in the last few days is a project that was originally promoted as a key Conservative initiative. The rebuilding of Stonehenge into a fully operational sports stadium was suggested as an important ele...

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Funny story: David Cameron invites Sir Terry Leahy to Join Coalition

David Cameron invites Sir Terry Leahy to Join Coalition

Our nice new PM has been reported to have invited Sir Terry Leahy the retiring CEO of Tesco to join the coalition government. "Let's face it Tesco has more money than the government - so we would be pretty stupid to not ask him for help" said Da...

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Funny story: 50 Year-Old Man Refused Wine In Tesco's - Because He Had No Idea

50 Year-Old Man Refused Wine In Tesco's - Because He Had No Idea

A man of fifty was stopped from buying a bottle of wine in Tesco's because he admitted to staff that he had no idea what he was buying. He said that he usually drank lager, but had decided on a whim to try wine. Staff at the Birmingham store firs...

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Funny story: "Fight for your rights to wear Jim Jams" Says Noel Fielding

"Fight for your rights to wear Jim Jams" Says Noel Fielding

The European Human Rights campaigner Noel Fielding has called for the Nation to fight for its rights to wear pyjamas. Not just in Tesco, but anywhere they want. He revealed this new campaign at a Press conference in Brussels and says he will die fo...

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Funny story: Mark Hughes Takes Shelf-Stacking Job At Tesco

Mark Hughes Takes Shelf-Stacking Job At Tesco

Unconfirmed reports here in the UK appear to suggest that recently deposed Manchester City manager, Mark Hughes, has accepted a £6.50 an hour temporary contract to be a night shift shelf stacker at a local Tesco Extra store. Hughes, a former Manch...

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Funny story: Man Rescued After Becoming Disoriented In Bang Yai Tesco

Man Rescued After Becoming Disoriented In Bang Yai Tesco

There was drama 'in store' for shoppers at a large supermarket chain in Thailand on Thursday, when a man became lost in amongst the superstore's vast number of aisles, and had to be rescued by a search party. Moys Kenwood, originally from Hull in...

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Funny story: Amazon Explorers Discover Supermarkets Deep In Jungle

Amazon Explorers Discover Supermarkets Deep In Jungle

A team of intrepid explorers working deep in a previously-uncharted area of the Amazon rainforest in Brasil, had the shock of their lives this week when, instead of the lost tribe of pygmies they were looking for, they stumbled upon an even greater d...

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Funny story: UK civil war breaks out between Sainsbury's and Tesco

UK civil war breaks out between Sainsbury's and Tesco

War broke today in Britain, as the huge forces of Sainsbury's and Tesco clashed in battles in Sheffield and London, and skirmishes also broke out across the United Kingdom in towns and even in villages. 'We could not tolerate Tesco's threat any lo...

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Funny story: Supermarket unveils new Environmental Policy

Supermarket unveils new Environmental Policy

A superstore giant today unveiled its attempts to save the planet. With the British Government indicating that if the supermarkets do not control the number of plastic bags in circulation, then they will act, the supermarket chain has responded by pu...

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Funny story: Supermarket chain unveils new delivery service for the sick

Supermarket chain unveils new delivery service for the sick

The Bestco supermarket chain, best known for it's huge retail outlets erected on every available space and school football field, has decided to extend its home delivery service to the sick and dying. Explaining its thinking, the director of opera...

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Funny story: Naked Man Found Wedged in Chimney

Naked Man Found Wedged in Chimney

London, England - Just when you may have thought the news couldn't get any weirder, police in Pemberton have discovered a naked man wedged in a chimney at a Tesco Express convenience store. Local police spokesperson, PC Soot, conveyed that police...

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Funny story: SLAG's and TART's in battle for customers

SLAG's and TART's in battle for customers

It was revealed today that the paramilitary wing of the Sainsbury's Local chain had begun moving into Tesco's Metro held territories in North London. The Sainsbury's Local Assault Group, (SLAG), had succesfully attacked a Tesco Metro in Camden.

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