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Funny satire stories about teeth

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Funny story: People would rather be punched in the face than go to the dentist

People would rather be punched in the face than go to the dentist

Britain is facing a bad teeth epidemic, and the Dentist Industry Watchdog, InterDent, has placed the blame firmly at the feet of dentists. "They're very expensive," said Ian Sizer, Press Officer for InterDent. "In a recent survey, people with toot...

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Funny story: Believing in the Tooth Fairy leads to memory problems

Believing in the Tooth Fairy leads to memory problems

The tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth. Researchers have been trying to track down the Tooth Fairy in a national study of infants. Cognitive scientists At Toddlers University asked lots of 5-year-olds about their most recent tooth lo...

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Funny story: Banana Cake Stuck To Man's Teeth

Banana Cake Stuck To Man's Teeth

An Englishman living in the Thai capital of Bangkok had a narrow escape earlier today, when a banana cake he was eating after his tea became stuck to his teeth, rendering his mouth immobile. Moys Kenwood, 48, originally from Hull in East Yorkshire...

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Funny story: Kate's stunning teeth 'kept in a glass of water at night time'

Kate's stunning teeth 'kept in a glass of water at night time'

London - The cosmetic secrets of Kate Middleton's pearly gnashers were revealed at a press conference at lunchtime today. A perfect alignment of all 32 teeth is mostly due to their part-time role that regularly ends at bedtime, orthodontic sources...

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Funny story: Neil Warnock's teeth

Neil Warnock's teeth

QPR fans are chewing over the formation of their manager's new teeth. "Sir Neil's Hampsteads don't seem to fit, he looks like Dick Emery's vicar" proclaimed lifelong QPR fan Ginger Vitis, a dental hygienist from East Acton. Warnock guided his...

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Funny story: Local Man Admits To Having Wooden Teeth, Plastic Kneecaps, A Concrete Skull, And Being Utterly Witless

Local Man Admits To Having Wooden Teeth, Plastic Kneecaps, A Concrete Skull, And Being Utterly Witless

Local man, Arsene Hipsway, of Titchyfields, Hants, reputedly a neighbour of talentless local fuckwit, Martin Shuttlecock, today admitted that his teeth are made of wood, his kneecaps constructed of window grade uPVC, and his cranium made of reinforce...

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Funny story: Toothpaste Company fined under Trades Description Act

Toothpaste Company fined under Trades Description Act

Cresgate, Britain's largest manufacturer of toothpaste and toothbrushes has been fined just under half a million pounds due to claims that the names of its toothpastes are "at best misleading" and "at worst erroneous". Cresgate gained the largest...

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Funny story: Richard Trevithick turns both ways at once in his grave as Google Doodle strips its gears

Richard Trevithick turns both ways at once in his grave as Google Doodle strips its gears

The Google Doodle commemorating the 240th birthday of Richard Trevithick, one of the fathers of steam locomotion, tore itself apart today, when the gears at its centre were found to be in a locked formation. Unfortunately, the Doodle had already bee...

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Funny story: Fascinating . . . Teeth

Fascinating . . . Teeth

I get many emails from people eager to learn more about the FASCINATING world of Teeth. Actually that's a lie. I have never got a single email relating to this matter, sadly. But deep down I know you have been craving some knowledge on this subject. Here are some FASCINATING Teeth facts. . . Teeth of different shapes do different work. Chisel-shaped 'incisors', the front tee...

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Funny story: Wooden Teeth To Make Comeback

Wooden Teeth To Make Comeback

Top Hollywood dentist Dr. Denver Colorado II has hailed his new technique as a 'genius breakthrough' for all his up and coming Hollywood actors.Denver takes up the story. 'It all started with my Father,Denver The 1st who invented Wooden Teeth for the likes of Walt Disney back in the early days of Hollywood. Walt was fed up with always brushing his teeth so Dad came up with the wooden teeth idea...

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Funny story: News Anchor hospitalised, Dental Patients left gagging as Natural Amalgam scandal unfolds

News Anchor hospitalised, Dental Patients left gagging as Natural Amalgam scandal unfolds

Dr. Harry Monk, a dentist in Newcastle has become embroiled in a major NHS scandal. Monk's Dental practice website states: "Mercury fillings are unsightly, and there is anecdotal evidence mercury amalgam may be hazardous to health" "At Mon...

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Funny story: Isle of Wight News - Churchill's Teeth Auction Failure Last Straw For Tragic Calbourne Collector

Isle of Wight News - Churchill's Teeth Auction Failure Last Straw For Tragic Calbourne Collector

Investigations into the tragic death of Calbourne man Dennis 'Den' Tystrie have swiftly revealed the tortured tale behind what Police are calling the suicide of the bachelor Chief Egg-Grader, writes Hailey Tociss, Crime, Dentistry, Antiques, Coarse Fishing, Short-Wave Radio, Classical Literature, Victorian Engineering, Commodities, Tartan and Cortical Architectonics Correspondent. Mr Tystrie, 5...

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Funny story: Simon Cowell to host new reality show "Britain's Got Teeth"

Simon Cowell to host new reality show "Britain's Got Teeth"

Simon Cowell's new reality t.v. show "Britain's Got Teeth" is to air very soon. When asked about the premise of this new show Simon explained, "Well, you must have heard how the people in the U.S. of A joke, frequently, about how bad the teeth of...

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Funny story: Esther's Teeth - Shock refusal to stand

Esther's Teeth - Shock refusal to stand

The faded television personality Esther Rantzen has unexpectedly withdrawn from her (doomed) quest to become an M.P. following a shock refusal from her teeth to be party to this charade. Calling a shock news conference to deliver the shock news her...

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Funny story: Horse and Jockey given severe sentence after admitting their part in "Toofgate"!

Horse and Jockey given severe sentence after admitting their part in "Toofgate"!

Liam Treadwell today had his "Fetlocks" savagely beaten in a hastily convened meeting at The jockey club in Newmarket where he was sensationally stripped of his amazing win in the 2009 grand National! He admitted cheating and named one "Mon Mome",...

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Funny story: 65 million complaints received over teeth jibe

65 million complaints received over teeth jibe

More than 65million complaints have been received since the weekend in regard to BBC presenter Sarah Boring's comment to Liam Treadmill. Yes, that's right, more than the entire population of Britain have nothing better to do than sit around making wh...

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Funny story: BBC's Clair Balding Imprisoned For Life!

BBC's Clair Balding Imprisoned For Life!

The BBC's Clair Balding has been sensationally sacked and sentenced to life imprisonment without trial for her foul mouthed tirade against winning Grand National Jockey Liam 'Buggsy' Treadwell's Gnashers. 'Don't smile and stand too close to the ho...

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