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Funny satire stories about heroin

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Funny story: Food Industry Touts Health Benefits Of Heroin

Food Industry Touts Health Benefits Of Heroin

Leading food industry specialists are now touting the health benefits of heroin. Following a trend in which food substances formerly famous as being detrimental to health are now 'discovered' to have healthy attributes, heroin, once seen as a vic...

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Funny story: Britain's Pensioners Turn To Heroin

Britain's Pensioners Turn To Heroin

Britain's pensioners are turning to hard core drugs in droves to escape the gritty reality of their useless lives in today's society, a report has today revealed. Pensioners are hounding down dealers on sink estates asking for cut price heroin and...

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Funny story: High School Musical 3 to tackle real issues

High School Musical 3 to tackle real issues

Waltfilms have revealed that the hotly anticipated 'High School Musical 3' will focus on realistic themes that will 'resonate better with the target audience.' Joe Robben, a press spokesman for Waltfilms worldwide, told us 'Setting it in Dundee gi...

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Funny story: Top 5 Reasons Your Teenager Needs to be on Hardcore Drugs:

Top 5 Reasons Your Teenager Needs to be on Hardcore Drugs:

1.) Drugs are insanely cool. Teens can jump start their popularity status by just injecting a couple of heroin shots-it's just that easy. Try mixing different hardcore drugs to get stronger effects; plus the higher you get, the cooler you become.

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Funny story: Heroin Users 75% More Likely To Be Successful

Heroin Users 75% More Likely To Be Successful

Figures out today suggest that heroin and crack cocaine users are 75% more likely to achieve success in the creative arts and music industry than non-drugs users.

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Funny story: Foot & Mouth Outbreak Caused By Heroin-Addicted Cow

Foot & Mouth Outbreak Caused By Heroin-Addicted Cow

The UK foot & mouth outbreak, Spoof News can reveal, was not caused by a sewage leak from the Government-funded Pirbright Research Centre, but was spread by a cow who mistook a sample of the deadly disease for heroin.

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Funny story: Brown admits Poppy production policy

Brown admits Poppy production policy

United Nations drug officials say the new Afghan Government has largely failed in its efforts to eradicate the opium poppy crop.

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Funny story: Smack can keep children from crime

Smack can keep children from crime

London - (Rotters): Giving children smack can keep them from turning to crime. That is the finding of a senior UK police officer who says the trouble with kids these days is they no longer respect their parents and turn to law breaking to get their...

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Funny story: Timmy Mallet - Chick Boy O.B.E

Timmy Mallet - Chick Boy O.B.E

Legendary children's television presenter, leading musician and heroin addict Timmy Mallet (real name Timothy Mallet) attended Buckingham palace today to receive an OBE for his outstanding work in recruiting transsexuals in Dorset.

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