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Funny story: St David's Day doomsday shocker

St David's Day doomsday shocker

London - (Armageddinouttahere! Mess): Biblical prophecy onanists have warned the transit of two-tailed Comet Lulin hails a terrible end for the Hellfire Club puppet monarch's reign this Sunday. "The comet augurs the fake dynasty matriarch choking...

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Funny story: Friday the 13th: noxious comet on collision course with toxic ghost ship scrapyard

Friday the 13th: noxious comet on collision course with toxic ghost ship scrapyard

London - (X-Files Mess): A highly noxious comet replete with Zyklon-B isotopes is on a Friday 13th February collision course with the UK shipping scrapyard charged with scuttling the toxic French aircraft carrier Le Clemenceau. Comet Lulin had be...

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Funny story: Aquarius solar eclipse news: Doomsday comet stationary over Buckingham Palace

Aquarius solar eclipse news: Doomsday comet stationary over Buckingham Palace

London - (Coup 'Stark' d'Etat Mess): Monday's magnificent Aquarius solar eclipse occurs horribly close to the credit crunching trajectory of a portentuous Doomsday comet that has been homing in on Buckingham Palace airspace all January. The comet'...

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Funny story: Comet 96P/Machholz 1 'on a collision course with Buckingham Palace'

Comet 96P/Machholz 1 'on a collision course with Buckingham Palace'

London - (Grateful Dead Sea Scolls Mess): The Biblical comet first seen at the Nativity in Bethlehem is making its Grateful Dead Sea Scrolls-predicted comeback this weekend over Buckingahm Palace. According to latest Scrolls transcripts we can exp...

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Funny story: New Comet Not-So-New After All

New Comet Not-So-New After All

Mount Palomar, California (IPP) - Astronomers have discovered a bright new comet which is being described as "not-so-new" after all. The comet was discovered in the constellation Ursa Major by the automated array system operating under very dark s...

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Funny story: Ancient Comet Wipes Out Earliest American Settlers

Ancient Comet Wipes Out Earliest American Settlers

In their latest findings, researchers Richard Bridgestone and Allen East say that they have found compelling evidence of a Native American culture predating the Clovis people, who were long thought to be North America's first colonists. The evid...

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Funny story: Comet Holmes Lands at American Airport

Comet Holmes Lands at American Airport

Palm Beach International Airport, Florida (IP) - Comet Holmes made history today when it became the first comet to land at an airport.

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Funny story: Comet Holmes Brightens to Negative 28 - Brighter than Sun

Comet Holmes Brightens to Negative 28 - Brighter than Sun

Detroit, Michigan (IP) - Comet Holmes has suddenly brightened to negative 28 magnitude which is brighter than the sun.

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Funny story: Comet Holmes has Second Comet Behind it

Comet Holmes has Second Comet Behind it

Mount Palomar, California (IP) - A second satellite comet has been found near the comet Holmes according to reports issued from the Mount Palomar Observatory Campus. Astronomer Dr. Povenmire Finootch has issued the name of Watson to the companion co...

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Funny story: Comet Holmes Heads for Planet Earth!

Comet Holmes Heads for Planet Earth!

Mount Palomar, California (IP) - Breaking news being broadcast in morse code from the Mount Palomar Observatory Campus indicates that Comet Holmes has changed course and is headed directly for the Earth. Morse code was used in order to avoid creatin...

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Funny story: Comet Holmes Signals End Times

Comet Holmes Signals End Times

Mephistophels, Tennessee (IP) - Comet Holmes is the fifth sign in a series of recent events that signals the end of the current world.

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Funny story: Hale-Bopp Comet Cult Returns to Earth

Hale-Bopp Comet Cult Returns to Earth

Cape Canaveral, Florida (IP) - The cult that left Earth and joined the comet Hale-Bopp in its journey trough the solar system has returned to a position near the Earth. The comet has been placed into a neutral zone in cislunar orbit.

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Funny story: Prey for Valentine's Day Second Coming says astrologers

Prey for Valentine's Day Second Coming says astrologers

London - (Rioters): Predators such as George Bush, Tony Blair and Pope Ratzinger could be in for a nasty Second Coming shock this Valentine's Day as a huge comet originating in the costellation of Aquilla the Eagle heralds the Return of the King,...

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