There was surprise and not a little anger in one locality this morning, as the progress of a man strolling through the streets minding his own business was suddenly arrested when a strong gust of wind blew his face mask from his face, and onto the pa…
There was much shivering and extreme reluctance to get into a shower in one household's bathroom this morning, when it was discovered that the water was cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey. Seasonal cold weather in this part of sout…
We have all, at some time or other, suffered the inconvenience of getting wet and having to change our clothing, but when one man and his wife got drenched in torrential rain yesterday, then drove into an underwater pothole and fell off their motorbi…
A distinct change in normal weather conditions left one man with no option but to endure a freezing cold shower this morning, an experience that virtually 'shrivelled up' some parts of his anatomy. The unseasonal week-long rainfall and dramatic dr…
As Autumn approaches and temperatures start to wain from the record summer highs of "Cold and Damp" to a mere "Bloody Freezing", a recent study has shown that men like being warm - even big, hard northern blokes. Statistics show that at least th…
A man who saw his back garden become a lake as it was submerged during a torrential downpour of rain over the weekend, has said he is considering his future employment prospects, and may decide to venture into the world of landscape gardening. Moy…
A weather whistleblower has said that supposedly funny news stories about the weather are now almost as popular as other supposedly funny stories about the US president, Donald Trump. The claim was made by a contributor to the satirical news websi…
There was utter confusion and a good deal of frustration earlier today, when the weather in one part of the world just couldn't make its mind up what it was going to do with itself, and kept changing from one extreme to the other. Having risen ear…
There was good news for fans of stability again, this morning, as, just as it has for the last 8.6billion years of the Earth's history, the Sun rose again over everyone's eastern horizon, bringing a bright, new day to each and every one of us. In…
A man who was in the countryside, far from home, when a deluge threatened to soak himself and his family, has revealed he took refuge underneath a tamarind tree - even though this exposed them to the danger of being struck by lightning. Moys Kenwo...
British award-winning freestyle rapper, Stormzy, is at a crossroads in his career this morning, after the second major extreme weather incident in two weeks battered the UK into submission under a torrent of rain, high winds and floods, leaving the s...
Thanks to weeks of unremitting thunderstorms, six-year-old Nashville resident, Chucky Dillon, was sentenced to consecutive time inside, without even time off for good behavior. "You really start missing the sunshine," said Chucky. "I would have gi...
An extra strong gust of wind was thought to have been responsible for damage to the fence of a house in Nottingham this morning, after the owner of the property woke early to go to the toilet, looked outside, and saw a section of his latted fence lai...
A cold snap that he was ill-prepared for resulted in one man going to bed last night clad in his tracksuit, big, thick football socks, a scarf, and a ski hat. Moys Kenwood, 56, a resident in Tapon commune, usually retires for the night in a T-shir...
A crisis engulfed the sleepy Durham mining village of Grim today, as locals reported several strange weather events throughout the week. Residents were baffled when the usually incessant rain began to stop for up to 20 minutes a day. Geordie G...
Tories are queuing up to support their leader, Boris Johnson, after his claim that flooding currently hitting the north of England is a direct result of EU membership. "It's simple," explained Johnson. "After 31 January, winds will be redirected a...
There was drama at the seaside at the weekend, when a man fell out of the sky onto a group of men who were innocently playing in the sea, causing them to become shocked and disturbed at the intrusion of their privacy. The incident happened at Marg...
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