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Funny satire stories about Unemployment

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America, Love It or Leave It says Milton Freeman

New York - The jobless rate in the U.S. has dipped to a five year low on steady gains. Employers hired at least 200,000 workers in the last four months. President Obama, upon hearing the news, said he was "ecstatic" and that the economy was "stup...

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Unemployed to be forced to wear identifying badges

Funny story: Unemployed to be forced to wear identifying badges

The Work and Pensions secretary Iain Duncan Smith today announced that the unemployed will from now on be forced to wear a badge identifying them as 'Work Shy' so that members of the public can easily identify them. "For too long the Work Shy have...

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CEO Envious of Temp Workers

Funny story: CEO Envious of Temp Workers

As industry relies more on temporary workers,  CEOs tout the benefits of temporary employment and the disadvantages of executive positions. "I know that this CEO position will only last 2-4 years. After that, I won't have an impressive title, free...

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Jobless rat hits another record

An unemployed rat has again caused damage in BBC Radio Gateshead's studio. DJ Ike Anspinnem was getting ready to play an old record by the BoomTown Rats when the jobless rat leapt on to the turn-table and hit the record with its front paws and hea...

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NY State Unemployment Benefits Collected by Dead People

Funny story: NY State Unemployment Benefits Collected by Dead People

It's the gift that keeps on giving. Even after death. Word is that officials will be trying to get the money back. Huh? Retrieval from The Great Beyond? Lotsa luck with that one! This situation intrigued reporter Gail Farrelly, so she went to a NYS unemployment benefits office and interviewed applicants waiting in line to see what they thought of this news. Here's what some of them s...

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Joblessness could affect millions

With unemployment among the working classes reaching record levels, a similar problem could well permeate the upper classes. Increasing numbers of 'toffs' are worrying about 'joblessness' (which is a 'posh' word for 'unemployment'). And hundreds o...

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Marijuana Legalization Responsible for University Patrol Lay-Offs in Colorado

Funny story: Marijuana Legalization Responsible for University Patrol Lay-Offs in Colorado

DENVER - University patrol officers file for unemployment throughout Colorado just a few months after the state effectively passed ballot initiatives legalizing, taxing, and regulating recreational marijuana use. After Amendment 64 had passed, un...

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'Jobseeker methane' used to preserve packets of value ham

Funny story: 'Jobseeker methane' used to preserve packets of value ham

It has come to light that the manufacturers of low-cost packets of ham have been using human-derived methane as a means of preserving the meat for longer periods. Unpaid staff who were recruited through the government's back-to-work scheme were force...

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Growing economic hard times have Irish little people community scared for their lives, gold

Many members of Ireland's little people community are scared tonight. There has been a dramatic and sudden rise of kidnapping amongst the little people community in Ireland during these economic hard times. Moody's Investors Service on Tuesday dow...

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UK Employment Figures Cause Rift in Fabric of Universe

Funny story: UK Employment Figures Cause Rift in Fabric of Universe

Emeritus Professor of Nonsensical Economics and Head of the International Monetary Fund, Brian Donahue addressed reporters yesterday from his secret lair on the slopes of an unidentified volcano in the South Pacific where Professor Donahue lives to a...

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Minneapolis Solves Its Unemployment Problem

Funny story: Minneapolis Solves Its Unemployment Problem

MINNEAPOLIS - The city council of Minneapolis, Minnesota has just announced that it has reduced the town's unemployment percent all the way down to zero. Council member Delta Joan Muscaretello spoke with an assembled throng of reporters and she re...

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Man Facing Redundancy Loses More Than One Job

An Iowa man, after learning he faced redundancy discovered that losing one job has a knock on affect, resulting in him losing three jobs in one day. Courtney Bowersocks, 45, was told that the factory where he works, producing chocolate fireguards,...

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Obama Uses Executive Order to Wipe Out Unemployment

Funny story: Obama Uses Executive Order to Wipe Out Unemployment

In a move that his supporters called brilliant, his detractors called an aberration of intelligence and the rest of us wondering why he ordered out when he could have saved money by eating in with DiGiorno, US President Barak Obama used an executive...

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Monopoly updated to reflect the current economic uncertainty

Funny story: Monopoly updated to reflect the current economic uncertainty

Monopoly, the world's most popular bored game, has had several incarnations, mainly by using different cities or the Simpsons. Now, MasterBate games have announced that the game will be getting its first major revision since the addition of the Scott...

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Nottingham News for W/E: 29th April 2012

Funny story: Nottingham News for W/E: 29th April 2012

Monday 23rd April 2012 Topic: Crime - Murder "Nottingham murder police in plea to taxi drivers" Source: BBC News Extract Police investigating the murder of a teenager outside a pub in Nottingham have appealed for taxi drivers who were in the area to contact them. Malakai McKenzie, 19, died from a gunshot wound following an attack outside the Hubb, on Hucknall Road, Sherwood, early on Saturday...

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Man Quits Job To Spend More Time With Netflix Queue

Funny story: Man Quits Job To Spend More Time With Netflix Queue

DES MOINES, IA-Area man Daniel Hammond has, according to sources, left his job as a soft drink vendor in order to stay at home and spend more time with his growing Netflix Queue. Hammond, 29, began his subscription two years ago, when his wife ca...

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Obama Points Out that Nation's Lack of Jobs Is Evidence of American Productivity and Efficiency: "We get our jobs done."

Funny story: Obama Points Out that Nation's Lack of Jobs Is Evidence of American Productivity and Efficiency: "We get our jobs done."

Throughout his reelection campaign, President Obama has remained unfazed by Republican accusations that the American economy has deteriorated significantly during his presidency. Despite record-high unemployment levels and the constant charge that "t...

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Britain's last crumpet factory closes

Funny story: Britain's last crumpet factory closes

There was wailing on the streets of Bradford as Kingsburton closed the last crumpet factory operating in Britain. "We have been making crumpets in Bradford for nearly four hundred years," said Kingsburton spokesman, Hillary Hovis. "Unfortunately,...

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