“It was just hard for me to believe I truly deserved it," said 19-year-old alleged armed robber Darien Keller of Nashville, Tennessee, after a high-speed police chase involving over 20 vehicles and an additional dozen officers on foot finally led to...
MILWAUKEE – Local authorities are reporting that overnight thieves broke into the Charmin Warehouse located on Soft Street and made off with 9,000 rolls of toilet paper. Surveillance cameras captured the three thieves who were dressed as Milwaukee...
Master of the Mint, Sajid Javid, is being held by officers from Scotland Yard this morning, after it was discovered a huge haul of special Brexit celebration 50p coins could not be accounted for. The commemorative coins should have gone into gener...
A London man was given two consecutive life sentences at The Old Bailey yesterday, after being found guilty of shouting loudly at a burglar who had broken into his home in the early hours of the morning in June of this year. Toby Dell, a postman f...
London, UK - A $50m stolen jewellery trail from a City of London heist is suspected of having been fenced into eager royal hands. The 2015 Hatton Garden theft saw a gang of professional safecrackers tunnel their way into a jewellery shop’s undergr...
My House - At the end of a busy day, around 11:00pm on a Friday evening, this writer found the alone time he needed to finally get some work done. Thanks to a disagreement over a questionable financial decision involving the purchase of one Harley-Davidson motorcycle (which, it is worth mentioning, should only grow in value if well-maintained - a task I feel entirely capable of managing), my wif...
Milwaukee, Wisconsin—A 20-year-old US Postal Service worker, whom police are calling “Jane Doe,” admitted to having stolen over 6,000 greeting cards full of cash or checks. “But it wasn't for the money,” Doe insisted during her arraignment. She...
There was trouble with a capital 'T' in Tapon this morning when it was discovered that a bicycle belonging to the daughter of a writer at satirical news website TheSpoof.com had been stolen. Delma Kenwood, 3, daughter of Moys Kenwood, loved that f...
There was 'tension around the table' in one Battambang household on Monday evening, when it was revealed that an airline fork, part of a cherished collection of airline cutlery, had gone missing. The fork - stolen from an EVA Air flight from Bang...
Osaka, Japan: A spate of robberies bamboozled Japanese police in Osaka as every time the cat burglar struck he was so fast nobody could catch him! Dressed in a Ninja outfit, the police thought he must be an upset Ninja warrior frustrated at not be...
Now in the days of sophisticated technology, hacking computers, CCTV cameras, smartphones, etc. A Birmingham (UK) bungling burglar wins first prize in being a total technological "dickhead!" The gentleman applied for a job at a betting shop in Bir...
As if we couldn't make this up ourselves, our attention unfortunately goes down to Florida the Sunshine State. The place where women run around in bikinis and the toughest decision one has to make is which beach to go to with your friends. A stat...
Two dimwit car burglars in Florida, wearing mandatory butt pants, attempted to burgle a car standing on a lonely parking area 'butt', the burglary went slightly pear-shape as they attempted to escape the scene of the crime! Caught on police CCTV c...
WASHINGTON, DC - President-Elect Donald Trump will be producing two other reality TV shows besides "Celebrity Apprentice" and one of these will be a mainstay on Faux News. Faux News, not to be confused with FOX News, is a supposed news channel tha...
Los Angeles, CA After her TV show was put on hold following her harrowing robbery in Paris where she was tied up and robbed, Kim Kardashian began a new crusade. "This incident really put the 'bare ass' in embarrassment" ranted Kim. "How could anyo...
In an unprecedented move Pfennigs the notorious law firm of London who protect their clients from 'defamation' have moved on The Sacred Heart Girls Secondary School in Hull, England. The students published a letter in their weekly online magazine...
In a major victory for a campaign run by The Sunday Telegraph, the Department for Justice will move to bring in a new law protecting criminals who break into people's houses. Ahead of the new law being introduced in the House of Lords this week, C...
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