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Funny satire stories about Suicide Bombers

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Funny story: Dead Suicide Terrorist Upset That 72 Virgins Are All Refurbished

Dead Suicide Terrorist Upset That 72 Virgins Are All Refurbished

Dead Afghan suicide terrorist, Oh No Mohammed, was disappointed to find out that his seventy two virgins reward for dying for Allah were all refurbished with non-human parts. Needless to say, he is really, really pissed. "I cannot believe this!"...

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Funny story: Pope encourages suicide bombings

Pope encourages suicide bombings

Today, the Pope controversially spoke of his desire to see Christian suicide bombers. In a speech to followers in London, he said "Those Muslims are getting all the attention by blowing themselves up. We Christians are being marginalised. The medi...

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Funny story: Stupid NYC Suicide Bomber's Fake Snoopy Blimp Blows Prematurely

Stupid NYC Suicide Bomber's Fake Snoopy Blimp Blows Prematurely

George Peay, also know as Habib Dibob, had everything worked out but the wind as he had built his own blimp and had some kid paint a big Snoopy on the side of it. His goal? Who knows but he was definitely determined to blow up something in New...

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Funny story: Suicide bomber sues Allah because he "only got 71 virgins in the after life"

Suicide bomber sues Allah because he "only got 71 virgins in the after life"

BEWARE THIS ARTICLE IS SO OFFENSIVE THAT EVEN THE AUTHOR ADVISES YOU NOT TO READ IT Al Qaeda extremist Mohammed Iqbal Yusuf, who died after detonating a suicide bomb last week in Pakistan, has said that he intends to sue Allah after discovering th...

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Funny story: Multiple Deaths Mar College Graduation

Multiple Deaths Mar College Graduation

The entire graduation student population was nearly lost when fifty-three were killed and six injured during the commencement ceremonies at an over-seas junior college. The graduation class had just finished the ritual of throwing up their caps, when...

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Funny story: Suicide Bomber says no Virgins in after life

Suicide Bomber says no Virgins in after life

A suicide bomber was miraculously brought back from the brink of death today after his left arm right leg and penis where blown to bits. In his first interview after his near death experience, he stated that he was ready and looking forward to dy...

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Funny story: Moscow suicide booby bombers: Mossad suspected

Moscow suicide booby bombers: Mossad suspected

Moscow - (Booby Traps): Mossad's Dubai hit squad is suspected of being behind the specialist Thought Police brainwashing division that trained today's Moscow Metro terror attackers. Two heavily burkhaed 'Jihad Janes' were caught on CCTV seconds be...

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Funny story: Suicide Bombers threat of Strike Action

Suicide Bombers threat of Strike Action

Terrorist suicide bombers in Britain are set to begin a three-day strike on Monday in a dispute over the number of virgins they are entitled to in the afterlife. Emergency talks with Al Qaeda management have so far failed to produce an agreement.

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Funny story: PM Blames Petrol Prices on Suicide Bombers

PM Blames Petrol Prices on Suicide Bombers

Barak Obama and Gordon Brown, today in a joint statement announced that petrol prices were set to rise again due to those pesky suicide bombers. Blaming those flammable bomber characters around the world for a hugely volatile petroleum market. At...

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Funny story: "Does My Bomb Look Big In This?"

"Does My Bomb Look Big In This?"

Al Quaeda has trained non-Arabic female terrorists to carry out attacks in the west. The news has been released by MI5 leaders in a bid to maintain vigilance. The women are thought to be 'clean skins'. Women notoriously take several hours to get r...

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Funny story: Terrorist Terrorised By Mom

Terrorist Terrorised By Mom

Potential suicide bomber Ali Von Bastard was stopped dead in his tracks today by his mom as he set out to wreak havoc on the world. "And where do you think you're going dressed like that?" Mrs Von Bastard called from the kitchen as she prepared du...

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Funny story: Jihadi Comes Back From Death; Outlines Disappointment.

Jihadi Comes Back From Death; Outlines Disappointment.

When budding Jihadi Mohammed al Pointlessrage ben Easilyled heard and understood the call to Jihad, he found the truth of his life revealed. Born into a seventh century culture in a barren desert, he was taught from birth that pleasure was unclean...

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Funny story: Jizz Bomber Arrested

Jizz Bomber Arrested

Potential jizz bomber Fred 'the Ted' Holden was arrested this morning on Cambridge Heath Road in London, by Bethnal Green tube station. Holden was suspected of undermining National Breast Appreciation Day by planting jizz bombs wherever bare breas...

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Funny story: A.C.L.U. To Represent Suicide Bomber in Lawsuit

A.C.L.U. To Represent Suicide Bomber in Lawsuit

The American Civil Liberties Union (the ACLU) has filed a lawsuit in behalf of failed suicide bomber Abdul Rahad, a man who attempted to blow himself up during a baseball game at Dodger Stadium. The Los Angelese Police Department (LAPD) arrested Rah...

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Funny story: CIA renamed 'Muslim Suicide Bombers'

CIA renamed 'Muslim Suicide Bombers'

America's Central Intelligence Agency, famous for doing Britain's dirty work across the planet in the name of American freedom, was today renamed the Muslim Suicide Bombers. As yet another MSB attack killed hundreds of innocent civilians in Iraq,...

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Funny story: Foiled Suicide Bomber Presses Assault Charges

Foiled Suicide Bomber Presses Assault Charges

A suicide bomber who shot and injured two police officers here in Kirkuk, northern Iraq has lodged an official complaint and is threatening to press charges against the men who brought him to ground and knocked him unconscious before tying his hands...

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Funny story: Suicide Bomber: "I'm in it for the money and fame."

Suicide Bomber: "I'm in it for the money and fame."

During an interview with a suicide bomber we were told that 'suicide bombing is freedom of expression and that all men are free to express themselves'. On further questioning we were told that 'some men want to leave with a bang'. We were also...

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