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Funny satire stories about Spiders

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Funny story: Men Seeking Banana Spiders for Killer Erections

Men Seeking Banana Spiders for Killer Erections

Scientists at a Georgia medical college have released study results which indicate banana spider venom contains a molecule which, when injected into a male subject, can cause a prolonged erection that out-performs any erectile dysfunction drug on the...

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Funny story: Eensy Weensy Spider - written to attract younger readers to the Spoof.

Eensy Weensy Spider - written to attract younger readers to the Spoof.

In an effort to attract younger readers to The Spoof, one writer has come up with the idea of writing especially for the kiddies. The following is her first attempt and, hopefully, not her last. Eensy Weensy Spider Gets Stuck in the Water Spout A near tradegy struck the Spider family this afternoon when Eensy Weensy Spider did not return home at the designated time. His mom of "Won't...

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Funny story: Upside of Australian floods is wipeout of horrible predators

Upside of Australian floods is wipeout of horrible predators

Brisbane - (Biblical Proportions): Millions of deadly brown snakes, tiger snakes, red back spiders, funnel web spiders, box and Irukandji jellyfish have been destroyed in the recent deluge. The predators are often cited as one of the biggest turn-...

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Funny story: Man Tries To Kill Spider, Blows Self Up

Man Tries To Kill Spider, Blows Self Up

A 28-year-old from Essex, England has suffered severe burns after igniting himself while attempting to kill a spider. The man was summoned by his wife after she saw the arachnid wreaking havoc in their bathroom yesterday afternoon. Unable to reach...

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Funny story: Progressives Would Rather Eat Live Spiders Than Trust Obama

Progressives Would Rather Eat Live Spiders Than Trust Obama

(Madison) According to Jones Applied Polling and Education Sciences, more than 90% of self-described American "Progressives" would rather shove live, furry tarantulas into their mouths, chew, and swallow, than trust anything that President Obama has...

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Funny story: Spiders with Massive Webs Start New Business

Spiders with Massive Webs Start New Business

Scientists had no sooner discovered a special type of spider that spins HUGE webs than these spiders decided to open a global business, "Snare The Bad Guys." What this unique spider service does is to grab up offending people and/or products, s...

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Funny story: 'Vegetarian' Spider May Not Be a Vegetarian

'Vegetarian' Spider May Not Be a Vegetarian

Scientists recently stunned the world by saying that they had discovered the world's first vegetarian spider. "Not so," claim his friends. Spiders the world over have contacted reporters to say that the story is not all that it seems. They ar...

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Funny story: Deadliest Catch Ann Coulter Bagged by Discovery's Channel

Deadliest Catch Ann Coulter Bagged by Discovery's Channel

DUTCH HARBOR, AK - In a bid to dramatically increase its viewing audience, Discovery's Channel will reportedly cut narrator Mike Roe from its highly-rated series Deadliest Crabs, bagging ice queen Ann Coulter to fill his role in the frigid Bering Sea...

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Funny story: Kurds See Spider, Riot In Khanaqin

Kurds See Spider, Riot In Khanaqin

A Kurdish official says hundreds of Iraqi Kurds, led by Miss Muffet, have stormed an election office in a disputed city after claiming many Kurds were not on voting lists for provincial elections. The protest in Khanaqin (pronounced as "Who Knows?...

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Funny story: Spider Bite Causes Genius

Spider Bite Causes Genius

A brand new species of spider has been discovered in Madagascar with a bite like nothing else. One bite from the tiny mandibles of this thumbnail sized arachnid, and the person bitten suffers from an IQ gain of more than 20 points. In more than 10...

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Funny story: Spiders Corner Web Design Market

Spiders Corner Web Design Market

Webb City, Missouri - In a predatory takeover bid, spiders have bundled up 83 per cent of the world's web design market. Tarantula Inc, a global conglomerate of spiders world-wide, sealed the deal with their recent hostile acquisition of a competitor...

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Funny story: Exotic Tropical Insects Invade UK

Exotic Tropical Insects Invade UK

Exotic species of spiders are making their homes in the UK according to a coven of dandruff-ridden, spotty, four-eyed anoraks writing in the latest issue of the Arachnid Stompers Weekly. Researchers believe arachnids and a myriad of other tropical...

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Funny story: Mythical WMDs Found In Spider's Web

Mythical WMDs Found In Spider's Web

Iraqi WMDs have been found inside a spider's web in Scotland.

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Funny story: Spiders Found Living In Boy's Ear

Spiders Found Living In Boy's Ear

An Oregon boy got the shock of his short life so far, when he found spiders living in his ear. Earache, followed by a loud 'popping' sound and a mad scrambling of tiny feet, alerted the boy&#...

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Funny story: Female spiders: Dine and Dash?

Female spiders: Dine and Dash?

VORACIOUS female spiders just cannot help trying to eat suitors before sex. Why? It's their aggressive personalities. Females of several spider and mantis species dine on their partners, but only after acquiring the sperm necessary to fertilize t...

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