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Congress Considers a Ban on the Trophy Hunting of Sexual Predators

Funny story: Congress Considers a Ban on the Trophy Hunting of Sexual Predators

WASHINGTON, DC--Two representatives today co-sponsored a new Bill in Congress that would ban, in the United States, the trophy hunting of sexual predators. The bipartisan co-sponsors, Rep. John Conyers from Michigan and Rep. Blake Farenthold from Te...

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Alabamians Vote in Alleged Serial Killer Judge Roger Ray Morris as Their New Senator

Funny story: Alabamians Vote in Alleged Serial Killer Judge Roger Ray Morris as Their New Senator

AL--Alleged serial killer Judge Roger Ray Morris, who maintains the nine bodies buried in his basement were already there when he moved in, won an election on Tuesday against Democrat Doug Jones. Morris, who is out on bail pending an investigation...

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Roy Moore: An Entire Nation Bemoans Media Attack on Visionary, Insightful Leader

Funny story: Roy Moore: An Entire Nation Bemoans Media Attack on Visionary, Insightful Leader

Mobile, Alabama - Republican voters, politicians and commentators in Alabama and across the country are stunned and disappointed by the Washington Post story detailing possible sexual abuse by Senate candidate Roy Moore of a young teenager 40 years a...

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Everyone Safe After Florida Man Guns Down Intruders

Funny story: Everyone Safe After Florida Man Guns Down Intruders

A Florida man and his family are safe, thanks to his quick thinking, and gunning down intruders on his front stoop. "I heard a knock at the door," says Robert, a thirty six year old white male from Tampa. "I grabbed my AR33 assault rifle and went...

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Gun Nut Layme DeRierre Says the Real Victim in the Las Vegas Mass Shooting Was the Much-maligned AR-15 Assault Rifle

Fairfax, VA--Layme DeRierre, CEO and Executive Vice President of the Gun Nut's Lobby, today said that the true victim of the mass shooting in Las Vegas was the AR-15 assault rifle used to kill over fifty people, in what is now the largest mass shooti...

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"I Stand By My President"

Funny story: "I Stand By My President"

Hypothetical: President Trump calls for the processing and imprisoning of 3 million illegal immigrants in internment camps in the United States. How will his fellow Republicans respond? Paul Ryan: "I idea of imprisoning 3 million immigrants--le...

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The politics of survival in Ghost Town, N.J., is existential, brutal and sad!

Funny story: The politics of survival in Ghost Town, N.J., is existential, brutal and sad!

GHOST TOWN, N.J. - "Mayor, Fat Cat Fringo wants to know if you've had the city water crew run the city water lines to his underground casino on the north side yet." I walked into the mayor's office and he was finagling around with one of those Rub...

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Sinkhole Swallows the White House

Funny story: Sinkhole Swallows the White House

WASHINGTON, D.C.--Residents are being evacuated from the White House due to a massive sinkhole that's already swallowed much of the Trump Administration. CNN reports that a depression the size of the Trump estate at Mar-a-Lago formed at around 8:...

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After Extreme Makeovers, Sean Spicer and Sarah Huckabee Sanders to Hold Press Briefings on Camera, with Sound

Funny story: After Extreme Makeovers, Sean Spicer and Sarah Huckabee Sanders to Hold Press Briefings on Camera, with Sound

WASHINGTON, D. C.--President Donald Trump, who had formerly called his Press Secretary and Deputy Press Secretary "too fat and ugly" to appear on camera, has tweeted that both Sean Spicer and Sarah Huckabee Sanders will again, after the duo's extr...

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So Sad!

Funny story: So Sad!

For a couple of decades now, I've made a practice of celebrating the Fourth of July by reading the founding and historical documents that underlie the exercise in representative democracy that is the United States. This has given me a new appreciatio...

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Encomium by a Conflicted Republican

Funny story: Encomium by a Conflicted Republican

Friends, Republicans, deplorables, lend me your ears; I come to defend Donald Trump, and to praise him. The tweets that men post oft live after them; And good is oft interrèd with their boners. So let it be with Trump. Sarah Huckabee Hath told you Trump is a fighter. And so he is, however fatuous, And pettily hath Trump now proven it. Here under leave of Huckabee and the rest (For...

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Deep Esophagus Reveals the Source of the White House Leaks

Funny story: Deep Esophagus Reveals the Source of the White House Leaks

AT A PARKING GARAGE SOMEWHERE IN WASHINGTON--In a meeting between David Corn of Mother Jones and a shadowy figure who only identifies herself as "Deep Esophagus," the source of the many leaks that have plagued the Trump Administration are coming to l...

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HB3 to Make Public Bathrooms Unavailable to Straight Men Unless They Can Prove They Aren't Child Molesters

Funny story: HB3 to Make Public Bathrooms Unavailable to Straight Men Unless They Can Prove They Aren't Child Molesters

New York, NY--The New York state legislature is poised to pass House Bill 3, which would make public bathrooms unavailable to straight men unless they can prove that they are not child molesters. Said Representative Anthony Sawyer, one of the spon...

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Reflections of a Cranky Atheist

There are times when I wish that more Christians, especially of the Social Conservative stripe, were more neighbor loving and less God fearing. I also suspect this would have the added effect of making them happier, more balanced people. Republicans have rewritten the Establishment Clause, "Congress shall make no law respecting the practice of Islam but shall make one prohibiting the free exer...

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Gov. Bourbon Signs Conceal Carry Law That Allows Children to Carry Without a Permit as Long as They Have a Valid Kindergarten ID Card

Funny story: Gov. Bourbon Signs Conceal Carry Law That Allows Children to Carry Without a Permit as Long as They Have a Valid Kindergarten ID Card

BISMARCK, ND--The state legislature of North Dakota today signed into a law a Conceal Carry bill that would allow children to carry a firearm as long as they possessed a valid kindergarten ID card. Gov. Doug Bourbon, eating lunch at his favorite b...

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Fox and Fiends to Welcome Satan As New Co-host

Funny story: Fox and Fiends to Welcome Satan As New Co-host

NEW YORK--The long running morning show Fox and Fiends announced today that it is welcoming, as its new morning co-host, Satan, the Commander-in-Chief of Hell. Enthused Steve Doocy about the new co-host: "We're really excited to have Satan as our...

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Republicans Praised for Reducing Stigma for Psychopaths

Funny story: Republicans Praised for Reducing Stigma for Psychopaths

Dateline: WASHINGTON, D.C.-The National Institute of Mental Health congratulated the Republican Party for helping to make less infamous those with mental illness, by elevating obvious psychopaths to positions of high office. Doctor Fernando La...

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Harrison Ford Fans Plead To Famed Actor To Land Plane On Trump And Pence. "Please use your awesome and terrifying aerial abilities for good instead of evil" says fans.

Harrison Ford, famous for playing such roles as Han Solo, and Indiana Jones, has a FUN new hobby of landing airplanes in comedic places. He's recently landed a series of small planes, ones that were built by the Wright Brothers personally, onto su...

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Breaking news…

Trump to Continue Dictator Tour

There are still a few dictators in the world that Trump hasn't groveled to.
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